This story isn’t as ridiculous as the title implies. Oh wait… it totally is. While filming the next season of Steven Seagal: Lawman, the martial arts master teamed up with Maricopa County, Ariz., Sheriff Joe Arpaio — himself no stranger to reality television — to raid the house of alleged cockfighter Jesus Llovera. According to The Onion AV Club, Seagal commandeered a SWAT tank and led dozens of officers in riot gear into the house, where they set off explosives, basically ripped apart the house from the outside in, and killed about 100 chickens in the process. Also a casualty of the raid: Llovera’s 11-month-old puppy. READ FULL STORY
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The best thing about going to New York Comic-Con — or any Comic-Con, for that matter — is that you have that all-too-rare, comforting feeling of not being the weirdest person in the room. In fact, no one is!
And it’s this spirit of acceptance that I tried to capture when I hit the Comic-Con floor with my handy flipcam this weekend. Take a look at the fun below. (And sincere thanks to all who participated!) READ FULL STORY
It was an awkward conversation with my college roommate the day we moved in together. “Are you really hanging that up?” he asked, glaring at my Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers poster. “Of course!” I replied unapologetically. I mean, if I was going to have to stare at his giant Moroccan tapestry all year, he could handle my little Power Rangers poster. (And my WALL•E poster. And my Lost poster. Oh, and maybe my Spider-Man and Pokémon posters, too.) My roommate sort of grimaced, trying his hardest to seem pleasant, and I gave him a similar look of pity — clearly, he was deprived as a child.
After all, what’s not to love about the Power Rangers? Jason, Zach, Billy, Kimberly, Trini, and Tommy were my gang growing up! READ FULL STORY
James Van Der Beek may have finally discovered his greatest role: James Van Der Beek. Consider the evidence. He made us laugh last month with the Funny or Die “Van Der Week” videos. Today, he co-stars in Ke$ha’s new “Blow” music video as a tuxedo-clad, laser-toting version of himself. And he was recently cast in the comedy pilot Don’t Trust the Bitch in Apt. 23 as a former teen heartthrob named James Van Der Beek. We talked to the ex-Dawson’s Creek star about unicorns, getting beheaded, and the difference between himself and “himself.”
ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY: What was your reaction when you were pitched the idea of shooting unicorns with lasers?
JAMES VAN DER BEEK: I’ve been on this kick in the last year or so of whatever’s being offered — no matter how off the wall — if it sounds fun, just saying yes. The pitch is, “Unicorns and lasers and a James Bond tuxedo?” I just said, “Why not?” READ FULL STORY
Ratatouille, and nerd demi-god Patton Oswalt has written a fascinating piece for Wired about the rise of geek culture from the schoolyard fringes — kids quoting Monty Python and playing Dungeons & Dragons — to its present status as an all-encompassing cultural force. You see geek culture everywhere now, Oswalt notes: The relentless parade of superhero movies, the post-Lost vogue for detail-obsessed TV fandom, “Boba Fett’s helmet emblazoned on sleeveless T-shirts worn by gym douches hefting dumbbells.” As you might guess from that quote, Oswalt’s less than joyful about geekery’s current mainstream dominance. “Everything we have today that’s cool comes from someone wanting more of something they loved in the past,” he notes. “Action figures, videogames, superhero movies, iPods: All are continuations of a love that wanted more.” Oswalt’s piece is hilarious and incredibly thoughtful, but his ultimate point is worth discussing: Has the internet-assisted rise of geek culture had a negative effect on pop culture? Certainly, Oswalt’s vision of the future sounds eerily possible: “One long, unbroken, recut spoof in which everything in Avatar farts while Keyboard Cat plays eerily in the background.”Comedian, starring-voice-of-
Oswalt begins with an extended personal riff about his own youth as an otaku with an encyclopedic knowledge of Alan Moore comics, a more leisurely time before the Internet made The Lonely Geek extinct. So you could feasibly dismiss Oswalt’s piece as a typical elder rant: Things were better in the good ol’ days before modern technology has ruined everything, and also what’s the deal with these kids on their cell phones and the Twitter, am I right!?!?! READ FULL STORY
Milla Jovovich points a lot of firearms in this weekend’s zombie thriller four-quel Resident Evil: Afterlife. Let us count the ways:
But which way is best? Let’s vote! READ FULL STORY
George Clooney. Oscar winner, former People‘s Sexiest Man Alive, international superstar with a new movie in theaters, and, finally, star of the sequel to a no-budget movie about evil tomatoes that try to take over the world. Perhaps Clooney would like to forget that last title, or at least the mullet he sported for it, but we sure won’t let him. Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the produce aisle, this week we’re taking a look back at one of the craziest and schlockiest horror-comedies of the 1980s, 1988’s Return of the Killer Tomatoes! Whether they’re vegetables or fruit, it’s pretty clear this film’s a bomb. But a bomb filled with mad scientists, product placement, sexy plant women, and vine-ripened hilariousness.
Keith Staskiewicz: The theme song has remained the same, the plot itself has hardly changed…
Darren Franich: [Humming theme song]
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