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Let's NOT discuss Hayden Panettiere's 'Wake Up Call'

Jul 17, 2008, 01:09 PM | by Michael Slezak

Categories: 'Heroes', Music, Ouch! That was my ear!

Today, I shall not speak of Hayden Panettiere's new single and video for "Wake Up Call." Yes, I know we could all share a laugh about the Heroes star's goat bleat "whoa-oh-oh-ohs" and the song's Paris Hilton-lite "reggae" beat. Or we could talk about our common discomfort at watching the 18-year-old actress seductively swivel her hips, writhe her jeans over her visible red undies, and pull off an oddly accurate resemblance to Ashlee Simpson when she slips on that baggy black hoodie. But then we'd just be succumbing to the same bi-coastal media cabal that has given us a depressing baseline awareness of the "singing" careers of Heidi Montag, the sisters Simpson, and El Lohan Diablo.

So instead, let's turn our attention to Little Jackie's "The World Should Revolve Around Me," the hip, happening new single from the act's terrific recent release The Stoop. No surprise that I'm loving this track, since I'm a long-time fan of the solo work of Little Jackie lead singer/songwriter Imani Coppola, but seriously, I think if you take a moment and press play, you'll find you love it, too. (How can you not love a song with lyrics like, "I bide my time with philosophical questions/ Not for nothing/ But what came first/ The chicken nugget or the Egg McMuffin"?)

What say you, PopWatchers? How about we collectively decide that today is the day we take back the airwaves, and the conversation, to focus on music that moves and excites us, instead of gumming the latest gruel served lukewarm and tasteless off the celebu-powered assembly line? Let the revolution begin right here, right now!

Cyndii Wed, Oct 15, 2008 at 06:45 AM EST

I actually liked the lyrics of this song..just because they are easy to relate to..if your in a relationship feeling unappreciated.

But I agree the video makes Hayden look awful. She does look like a bad Ashlee simpson look alike in the end.

The beat is a bit like the Paris Hilton one...but it makes a different direction which makes it, it's own.

The sleazy panty line thing and the skanky dancing...was horrible..made hayden lose some of my respect for her as an actress...never thought she would behave like lohans, britney or paris and try and get attention in a similar way...:(..sad because I liked her as a young actress.

And I liked the beat and lyrics until she tried raping and looking all hip hop near the end...it was dreadful to watch...and it made the song and video worse...

She should have made the video like a mini movie with a real meaning towards the lyrics..since acting is her real talent...and passed on the rapping. And it would have been a great song.

annie Thu, Sep 18, 2008 at 07:47 PM EST

it was kinda catchy but i wish the lyrics were different

workworkwork...stillworkingright? Wed, Sep 10, 2008 at 03:09 AM EST

you know... half the dudes on this planet all thought the same thing when that video came out "YES!" and now they hide cowardly in their homes posting meaningless blogs that show about as much respect as they have for themselves... stop running from the truth and know that if you were someone in this world you would be hated by people like you. Hayd your music is awesome... everything about you is awesome... dont give up hope for any of these people and remember to hold your colors against the wall
respect and love

enim Wed, Sep 3, 2008 at 11:06 PM EST

You guys are horrible the song is nice. Neither of you can do any better. Just because your dissing the song and giving it so much attention it's going to hit number one on the charts. By the way haters only make you feel good. That's when you know your doing something good.

Claire Sat, Aug 16, 2008 at 07:39 AM EST

The song is good the video sells her short, its very unoriginal and she doesnt need to sell herself. I was very suprised by it.

Carli Tue, Aug 12, 2008 at 10:59 AM EST

I love hayden and her new song! she is a great role model you dont see her taking naked pictures of herself and puting them online or selling drugs or in a rehab she has a great voice and is a good actress as well. She has a lot more talent then a lot of these "rappers" casue lets be serious anyone can make a friken ryme and "rap" it on t.v its not that hard!

sham Thu, Aug 7, 2008 at 06:24 AM EST

ugh, Hayden really p***s me of she's nothing but a spoilt brat. Just because she's going out with Milo Ventimiglia she thinks she's all grown up err, "wake up call hayden" you'r childish and pathetic you suck.

Brad Sat, Jul 26, 2008 at 05:41 AM EST

Sorry but anyone that cant keep their eyes on Hayden doesnt deserve the effort of cheating on to get their attention back on her!! My attention was there all the way through!! Good song though!! Love Hayden!! XxX

Elizabeth Tue, Jul 22, 2008 at 03:16 PM EST

I saw Little Jackie two weeks ago at the Knitting Factory. I'd never heard of them at the time (I was there solely to see Tally Hall, who came on right after them) but I was definitely impressed. They put on a good show, too.

Yuki Tue, Jul 22, 2008 at 03:11 AM EST

I don't know why Hayden decided to shoot that music video, and her mother led her to do it! I thought she'd be more original not a obvious copy version of Paris and typical 'rock chick girl' look...That was 3minutes of pain looking at 18 years old girl singing about that kinda stuff....She's a great actress, I thought if she'd try something different in Entertainment career like singing, she'd pursue a different look...than that, now she just looks like another one of stupid blonde chick...

But I like Little Jackie's song, that's nice, this society needs to focus more on good music thats with a good singer and band , not a name value celeb-wannabe singers..

k.. Mon, Jul 21, 2008 at 08:41 PM EST

she CAN sing thats for sure .. its not a bad song .. its just that when an actor wants to sing everyone judges them instantly .. maybe her song is not a hit but that dosnt mean she cant sing .. her other songs are not bad at all... she has talent for singing .. you should listen to her vocal instead of judging her like that .

Frankie Mon, Jul 21, 2008 at 08:14 PM EST

I guess she got over those dolphins.

ME Mon, Jul 21, 2008 at 05:17 PM EST

SKANK ALARM!!!! Who directed this video, Spencer Pratt? You think she would have picked a better video concept

Dan Mon, Jul 21, 2008 at 09:41 AM EST

That is the worst song I've ever heard. I don't know how else to convey the worstness of the song. Blech.

Fatima Mon, Jul 21, 2008 at 12:51 AM EST

I now hate Hayden more than anyone of the young starlets. Not only do I hate this feeling of entitlement that all young actresses automatically feel they deserve a pop career, but Hayden is really disgusting in this. Her relationship with Milo whatshisface was clearly when she was still a minor, and now she's even trashier than how she looks in her Candies commercial. A little prostitute. Seriously someone should slap her mother

Casey Sun, Jul 20, 2008 at 06:32 PM EST

Bad song.....Stick to Heroes she is Hot..but not a good singer

Lauri Sun, Jul 20, 2008 at 06:06 PM EST

In the spirit of paying attention to unknown bands, Mike why don't you write an article on Bond? They are an all-girl string quartet that play pop/dance music. They are a group who could use the kind of exposure that is too often given to the Hayden Panettiere's of the world.

monica Sun, Jul 20, 2008 at 12:49 AM EST

i didn't think hayden's song was that bad. it has the right amount of summer fluff for z100.

Lennie Sat, Jul 19, 2008 at 11:08 PM EST

i don't think hayden has a bad voice. it would sound so much better if it was just her and a guitar singing something that had a little heart. or maybe i would like the song more if the first time i heard it was when i watched the video right now. i'm tired of the whole being seductive in the club motif. it's boring. she should've had a video with more of a wow factor.

lola Sat, Jul 19, 2008 at 10:02 PM EST

i love haydens new song!!!!! it is catchy, i also like the vid

nujerz Sat, Jul 19, 2008 at 09:20 PM EST

I like Hayden as an Actress but her music is trash.

ziggy Sat, Jul 19, 2008 at 06:52 PM EST

Little Jackie's song is so great: fresh, unique, witty and very catchy. Thank you Slezak for introducing me to that group. As for poor Hayden, the song isn't gruel, it's Krusty-brand imitation gruel. She actually reminded me of Pete Wentz in the hoodie, not Ash. She should stick to pouting, I mean acting in Heroes. :)

Jessica&BritneyFan08 Sat, Jul 19, 2008 at 04:08 PM EST

loving Hayden's new single it's catchy!!!

fussbucket Sat, Jul 19, 2008 at 10:57 AM EST

Wow, that Little Jackie track is very catchy! Love it!

DM Sat, Jul 19, 2008 at 04:34 AM EST

Although this isn't my kind of music, Hayden does have a good voice. It's an odd choice for the first single from an album, but to be honest, I can't understand all the hatred directed at her here. Sure, it's not Thom Yorke or the Klaxons, but it's meant to be a pop song, right? I think a lot of this criticism is based on jealousy and snobbery.

Fri, Jul 18, 2008 at 08:19 PM EST

the club setting of hayden's video doesn't go with the reggae.

who do these starlet's think they're kidding? Their claim to fame isn't even for their talent, it's for being skinny and being willing to show cleavage.

portland Fri, Jul 18, 2008 at 07:23 PM EST

Haydens freaking amazing and she looked hogg in the video.Everyone needs to quite hatin.

delta Fri, Jul 18, 2008 at 07:00 PM EST

Hadyen reallly surprized me!!!!!!!!!!! i like it. im surprise.!

Joey Fri, Jul 18, 2008 at 04:44 PM EST

hayden's song is so good!!

Fri, Jul 18, 2008 at 11:31 AM EST

she sucks.

Lili Fri, Jul 18, 2008 at 08:15 AM EST

No comment on Hayden's track... I would like to say a big "thank you Slezak" for introducing me to Little Jackie! Awesome song! The lyrics are refreshing and hilarious! Love it!

IAA Kristi Fri, Jul 18, 2008 at 08:06 AM EST

OK. Lets all take a moment and bask in the brilliance of whoever thought of rhyming "jealous" and "wake up". Wow. Maybe they were thinking, "Let's take Emily Dickinson's not-quite-rhymes to a new level!" or maybe they were thinking, "She's 18, blond, and a size 2. Who is going to notice?"

IAA Kristi Fri, Jul 18, 2008 at 08:03 AM EST

OK. Lets all take a moment and bask in the brilliance of whoever thought of rhyming "jealous" and "wake up". Wow. Maybe they were thinking, "Let's take Emily Dickinson's not-quite-rhymes to a new level!" or maybe they were thinking, "She's 18, blond, and a size 2. Who is going to notice?"

nick Fri, Jul 18, 2008 at 06:15 AM EST

hahaha wow!! this video made my day! this video should be put on comedy central; boost the ratings. haha

this song/video lacks originality, substance(lyrically and creatively), and enthusiasm. but, she has some courage; a white girl doing reggae, very courageous.
seriously, if she wrote her own lyrics, she must read at a 5 grade level.
she has quality vocals but if her lyrics have absolutely no vocabulary or imaginations, then the song is going to suck. simple as that.
oh yea, the faces she makes in this video, priceless* The dear hunter and circa survive check it!

Joe Fri, Jul 18, 2008 at 02:55 AM EST

Hey Michael, go to YouTube and search for Jessica Simpson's "I Wanna Love You Forever." Let that be a reminder to you to do your research before typing up your list of female singers you wish to diss. That's a vocal range any singer wished they had.

Hayden's song is fun. Shabooyah, sha sha shabooyah, role call!

Ew Fri, Jul 18, 2008 at 01:17 AM EST

That song reminded me of Gwen Stefani's Underneath it All (and i love Gwen).. what's with the constant mugging for the camera and the shiny make-up? Talk about NO originality in that video or the song.

ben Thu, Jul 17, 2008 at 09:53 PM EST

I thought it was pretty good. U guys are pretentious. If she wants to sing let her sing. If you don't like it don't buy it.

jonny rocket Thu, Jul 17, 2008 at 09:03 PM EST

you guys are crazy. that wasn't that bad. she will make some money with that.

aps Thu, Jul 17, 2008 at 03:19 PM EST

he doesn't buy you drinks hayden???? oh wait...he really shouldn't be. you're not old enough to drink.

Frances Thu, Jul 17, 2008 at 03:17 PM EST

I'm all for an end to celebrities who think they can sing and overpopulate the airwaves when there is so much great music not being heard. I was more disturbed by the way Hayden was oversexing it and the lyrics. She doesn't sound that bad and the beat is kinda stuck in my head. But I can see all the Paris, Lindsey comaprisons already. So sad. I kinda liked her...

Gary Thu, Jul 17, 2008 at 02:53 PM EST

Put me in the minority. I actually preferred Hayden's dreck. The other song was terrible.

Martha Thu, Jul 17, 2008 at 02:21 PM EST

Hooray for Little Jackie! I've been listening to several songs off "The Stoop" over the past few weeks courtesy of KCRW and the awesome Nic Harcourt. Great stuff. Didn't even consider pressing play on the Hayden P. video.

ed Thu, Jul 17, 2008 at 02:16 PM EST

Hayden may play someone who cannot be killed on "Heroes," but that song just murdered her career.

cruzilla Thu, Jul 17, 2008 at 01:56 PM EST

I'm pretty sure the phrase "Paris Hilton-lite" is a sure sign of the end of civilization as we know it.

Elizabeth Thu, Jul 17, 2008 at 01:33 PM EST

Viva la revolution Michael!
I just thought of when Donny Osmond release "Soldier of Love" and no one knew for a while who it was, or what they looked like, it was just a simple pop song that people liked. Oh, those were the days when the package didn't matter.

Em Thu, Jul 17, 2008 at 01:12 PM EST

Oh Hayden. Say it ain't so. That was the most dreadful thing I've seen in a while.

Emoney Thu, Jul 17, 2008 at 01:07 PM EST

Thanks Michael! Little Jackie is adorable and fun. I will go download that song tonight, I think.

Green Gummi Bear Thu, Jul 17, 2008 at 01:06 PM EST

Oh. My. God. I've never lost more respect for someone that quickly in my life. I know, we're NOT supposed to discuss it (just as we should NOT post a link to it), but what the hell is she saying? Starts of saying buy me stuff, then talks about how since the guy isn't buying her stuff and otherwise "paying attention" (because he "already bagged" her?), she guesses she'll have to cheat?!? What is this teaching young girls? Be a ho for stuff? I smell a celebrity sex tape in her future...

Snarf Thu, Jul 17, 2008 at 01:00 PM EST

80% awful 20% hideous, %100 crap.

Phil Thu, Jul 17, 2008 at 12:43 PM EST

Ok, I'm in with Michael on this, this Hayden song/video is complete crap. As soon as I started the song, I was reminded of Paris Hilton's "Stars Are Blind" almost instantly. Hayden should be ashamed, but I would seriously love to know what a straight guy thinks of this. I mean, if the gays aren't sold, you know this song is not going anywhere. I mean, between this and Ali Lohan's tragique single released last week, all these teenage girl pop-star-wanna-be's should all get together for lunch at the Ivy and wonder why everyone, like hates them y'all! Side-note, I still LOVE Linday's "Bossy" track. And the best pop song of the summer has gotten no love, other than being quietly released on iTunes back in May: Tami Chynn Feat. Akon "Frozen" ! Go download that, and forget this Hayden crap!

seon Thu, Jul 17, 2008 at 12:35 PM EST

Hayden needs just that- a wake up call from this disaster. groans and I love reggae!

Nancy Thu, Jul 17, 2008 at 12:34 PM EST

I will join your army, Slezak! I've never heard of Little Jackie or Imani Coppola, but I love those lyrics! And your words about taking "back the airwaves, and the conversation, to focus on music that moves and excites us, instead of gumming the latest gruel served lukewarm and tasteless off the celebu-powered assembly line" - music to my ever-hopeful ears!

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