MTV Movie Awards host Rebel Wilson is known for a particularly uncomfortable brand of comedy. Witness: Pitch Perfect‘s Fat Amy, who told the Barden Bellas she adopted the moniker “so skinny bitches like you don’t do it behind my back.” Considering the fact that at least one promo for tonight’s show featured a punchline in which Wilson found her in a compromising position regarding Channing Tatum’s junk, it seemed clear that the Aussie hostess wouldn’t spare the salacious.
To her credit, Wilson didn’t go the safe route. Most of her jokes fell on the absurdist side of the comedy spectrum rather than the conventional, Poconos-style yuks that hosts generally adopt for these occasions. (The one exception, in her intro of Kerry Washington: “Our next presenter is one of the few actresses that plays strong black women more than Tyler Perry.”) Whether her one-liners landed or not, they certainly delivered an across-the-board jaw-drop factor.
Below, we run down Wilson’s most obscene, sometimes cringe-worthy, lines from the 2013 ceremony.
On being chosen to emcee: “I’m just a fat, simple girl from Australia. All I’ve ever hosted is this parasitic worm.” [Oh yes, there was a prop for this one]
On her Channing Tatum body pillow: “It’s not what you think. I use that to masturbate.”
After an Iron Man-gina landing in the auditorium: “Oh, I landed right on my vag!”
From her opening monologue: “A big hello to our international viewers in North Korea! Special shout-out to Supreme Leader Lil’ Kim. Hopefully he doesn’t see me onstage being all hard and prematurely fire his missile.”
Re: Best Shirtless Performance: “‘Cause we can’t call the award Best Softcore Porn.”
On Sexiest Beard: ”Nominees for that include Ben Affleck for Argo, Daniel Day-Lewis for Lincoln, and Lena Dunham’s vagina. [Crowd gasps] What? It’s been on a lot of faces.”
Paging Channing Tatum! “He has a Magic Mic that I’d like to sing into.”
On the role that got away: ”My personal WTF Moment was when I found out I lost out to Jamie Foxx for the title role in Django Unchained. I was like, ‘What the? I could play black! I’m really into fat white chicks.’ Yeah, I’m inside one right now.”
Presented without comment: ”If you’re wondering why I was only nominated for three of the categories tonight, it’s because I don’t swallow.”
Accepting her Breakthrough Performance trophy: ”The only thing that would make this better is if Zac Efron [who's presenting the next award] took off his shirt right now and came and kissed me. Do you want to give me an Australian kiss now [Zac]? It’s like a French kiss but down under.”
And then there was that whole wardrobe malfunction-evoking visual gag about her supposed third nipple. Ummmmm… yeah.
What did you think, movie fans? Which of Wilson’s lines did you find most shocking? And were they shocking in a good or bad way?
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Rebel Wilson talks hosting the MTV Movie Awards, voting for Channing Tatum, and (probably) losing to Jennifer Lawrence