Offering further evidence that all the fun internet things you love are owned by companies with the goal of ruining your life forever, Instagram has disabled its Twitter cards integration, which means that any Instagram photo viewed on Twitter’s website — all those shots of you and your friends partying in a sepia-tinged universe, all of your vacation pictures which look like they were taken on a Polaroid in the ’70s back when things made sense, various semi-nude portraits of Rihanna — now look a little bit off-center. You might think that they look artfully off-center, much like how all of your Instagram pictures look artfully terrible, but you would be wrong.
In fact, Instagram has completely changed its relationship with Twitter. Instead of viewing Instagram photos on Twitter, clicking on an Instagram link in a tweet now sends you straight to Instagram’s website — which basically looks exactly like Twitter, except just different enough.
According to The New York Times, this decoupling is part of a slowly-brewing war between Instagram and Twitter over one of the world’s fastest-growing industries: Specifically, the industry of “Sharing relentless photos of yourself with really cool lighting effects that make you almost look like a movie star, but not really, partially because modern man has snuffed all the stars out of the sky, but mainly because you aren’t a good photographer.”
The good news is that nothing has actually changed except that Twitter and Instagram are both .00001% more annoying than they were yesterday, and also we have advanced one day closer to the inevitable point where your Instagram profile will occasionally apply an “Advertising Filter” which photoshops Andrew Garfield’s Spider-Man and the Colonel from KFC into a photo of you and the old gang at your college reunion — a photo which you didn’t actually need to post, since everyone else took the same photo with their iPhone and posted it immediately, and they used a really sweet black-and-white filter and not that annoying red filter you love so much. In conclusion, all the cool kids are using Hipstamatic, man, it’s so much more authentic.
Follow Darren on Twitter: @DarrenFranich
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