Hot on the heels of a real tragedy, sources close to The X Factor say that judge Nicole Scherzinger will join host Steve Jones in their expulsion from the harsh, red galaxy. Nicole will not return for season 2, having received Simon Cowell’s blessing to go forth — far, far, away… no, no, a little farther… please, love, if you could just keep walking — and work on her music.
Since turning my “I love Steve Jones” post inside out and doing “10 Things I Won’t Miss About Nicole Scherzinger” seemed a bit cruel, here’s a benign roundup of some of Nicole’s most poignant and thought-provoking utterances in season 1. Print these out and let her wisdom guide you through life. You’re an inspiration for her.
Merely 12 of Nicole Scherzinger’s Most Powerful Lines of Poetry from ‘The X Factor’
“We’re nothing without the talent.” (during a confessional from her hotel suite in Seattle)
“If I were a teenager again, you’d be all over my walls.” (to the Brewer Boys) (ew?)
“If I were a season, I’d want to look just like you.” (to Lakoda Rayne)
“I felt like we were at LeRoy’s rock concert, and you took us to church at the same time, honey!” (to LeRoy Bell)
“You are America’s sunshine.” (to Rachel Crow after “Walking on Sunshine”)
“You’ve made a believer out of everyone in America.” (to Rachel Crow after “I Believe”)
“If that song doesn’t save a small country somewhere, I don’t know WHAT will.” (to Melanie Amaro after “Earth Song”)
“You remind me of a young Al Green.” (to Marcus Canty)
To Rachel Crow, moments before twisting her stiletto into a young girl’s heart: [DELICATELY DABBING EYES WITH TISSUE] “I can’t make this decision, please. Cuz I been up there and I love both of you I have to go with a deadlock please. I don’t wanna have to say that… I don’t wanna… um. Uh. I’m just gonna have…. Yeah. You know… Unhhh?!… So the act that I have to [AIR QUOTES] send home is Rachel.”
“This is your freedom anthem.” (to Melanie Amaro after “Feeling Good”)
“Your spirit transcends across the universe.” (to Chris Rene)
“You made me feel in that moment that I wasn’t alone, and you empowered me. People like you inspire me.” (to winner Melanie Amaro re: her audition)
Special mention: “I believe in you. You believe in me. You transcend the universe. God is smiling on you. Life is a waterfall, and you are the ultimate rainbow.” –Simon Cowell imitating Nicole’s judging style. (This also happens to be the best compliment in history.)
Will you miss Nicole’s wisdom on The X Factor? How can Simon and His followers possibly replace such an elegant sage?
Ask Annie about how to get over Steve Jones gracefully (or another topic) in the video player below. To see her answers to previous questions, click on the text links below the picture.