Image Credit: Martin Bernetti/AFP/Getty ImagesNow that all 33 of the miners have been safely rescued in Chile, and Discovery has just announced that it will premiere a documentary on “the triumph of engineering and human spirit” on Oct. 28 (working title Rescued: The Chilean Mine Story), you can bet the pitches are flying in Hollywood. So, which one of these hypothetical, completely made up by us projects are you most eager to see get the greenlight?
• 70 Days: The gritty, powerful, realistic Oscar bait directed by Danny Boyle. (We’d like to call this 10 Weeks, to complement Boyle’s 127 Hours and 28 Days Later… but it doesn’t have the same ring to it.)
• Buried: Not the Ryan Reynolds movie, but the J.J. Abrams-produced miniseries that would be recapped by Doc Jensen and given the Hidden Gem treatment by Annie Barrett, who’d consider the darkness a challenge.
• Mine: The Lifetime movie focused on the above-ground drama between Yonni Barrios’ wife and mistress. (He’s clearly everyone’s favorite miner after he invited them both to the families’ televised reunions, right? Only the mistress showed.)
• Camp Hope: The feel-good Disney flick. “They were buried for 70 days, but they never gave up… hope.” The poster would be charcoal-colored with a silhouette of the pose struck by 63-year-old Mario Gomez in front of the Fenix (pictured) in white.
• Shaftopus: The Syfy Saturday night movie in which miners become trapped underground with an ancient tentacled creature capable of reaching into eight tunnels at once.
Not happy with any of these pitches? Suggest your own.
Read more:
Chilean mine rescue: Celebrities tweet their support
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is this appropriate?
yes, they all made it out alive and well. and you know Hollywood is all over this right now.
Yes, I’m with maj. And “Shaftopus” sounds BRILLIANT.
It feels at least borderline inappropriate to me. Since they all survived, it may not quite cross that line. But it sure comes close. But to answer the question, none for me. Thanks anyway….
I’d go see “70 Days” if it got good reviews/out of curiosity, but nothing can top the real thing.
I agree. How about a documentary about the rescue operation?
Just the documentary, thanks.
A bunch of guys trapped in South America … if they didn’t start eating each other, there’s no way this movie can be as good as Alive.
none would be my choice.
Agreed, this movie would be boring as all hell.
x2
None of them, really. I swear the minute I heard about this event I thought “in two years there’s gonna be a Hollywood movie about this”.
Alive 2 ?
None of the above.
Hoping for a decent documentary with a sit down with all the fellas if it has to be done. Honestly, I’d rather read a book with a chapter from the point of view of each of them.
Oh I’ll probably watch the documentary and 70 days.
Great list, Mandi.
I especially like the succinctness of “Mine”. Funny!
But I think Paul Greengrass would be best to direct a gritty, powerful etc.
I want to see the gay porn version: “Deep Inside My Mine” or “33 Men and a Shaft”
So inappropriate, yet so funny!
I was going to say Shaftopus sounded sort of filthy. maybe that’s just me…
“So Many Miners, Such A Tight Hole”
How about jazzing it up with a little of The Descent? Have some blind cave dwelling cannibals stalking the miners. If they don’t get out by Halloween, they’ll be eaten!
I want to see the South Park version where, after 69 days in the hole, the boys meet L. Ron Hubbard, Chef, Jesus – and Johnny Depp in Wonderland. The whole second half of the show will be negotiating the movie deal, with subtitles for the various foreign rights.
i don’t want to see one at all. the real thing was unimaginably gripping pure drama
How about the Elvis loving miner’s trip to Graceland (which is actually happening)? You could Hollywood/Disney it up by having them all come along.