'Gossip Girl' recap: Dan, Olivia, and Vanessa get REEEEAAAAALLLLY close

gossip-girl_lYou can tell it was a good episode of Gossip Girl because the much-hyped threesome wasn’t even the best part. In fact, it kinda yielded mixed emotions…at least from me. Hilary Duff attempting to be sexy just felt, uh, weird. I had a similar reaction to seeing Julie Andrews naked in the movie S.O.B. It’s just not something you want to see, kinda like grown women wearing Loony Tunes paraphernalia. But, honestly, the whole thing was pretty chaste. Aside from a shot of them all in bed together in the end, it was basically no more risqué than a game of spin the bottle.

I still really think a guy-on-guy-on-guy love story would have been hotter but that could be my own personal bias. Chuck needed to somehow be involved in this situation. He’s the sexually adventurous one. Dan’s and Vanessa’s idea of experimenting is picking out exotic teas at the coffee shop.

I like where this is all going though with Vanessa and Olivia getting into it next week. Vanessa has CLEARLY never gotten over Dan and I’m sure there was a part of her (I’ll let you guess which part) that was completely thrilled at the chance of sleeping with Dan. Take her down, Olivia!

The storyline I enjoyed more than all the ménage a trois action was Jenny’s. One of my big problems with this season so far was that there wasn’t really a villain or anyone to unite the cast against. Well, folks, that sure has changed. Jenny’s evolution into a true Upper East Side beast is totally fantastic. I don’t buy that she could become this popular with those clothes or that hair but whatever (Also did we always know that her middle name was Tallulah? Where in the hell did that come from?). Her cotillion dress was a little underwhelming too and what was with the gloves? Still, I love Jenny and Eric going at it. This is developing into a really fun rivalry. It’s like a younger (and gayer) Serena and Blair, complete with a blonde versus a brunette.

We were introduced last night to a new character, Kira Abernathy who appears to be Eric’s new partner in crime. I think Kira could be my new fave character, a substitute for the loss I feel for Nelly Yuki. I loooooved (and laughed out loud) when Eric promised Kira that next time they would take Jenny down “for good.” I only wish he had a mustache to twirl although I’m not sure he’s old enough to grow facial hair.

Farewell to Eric’s boyfriend, Jonathan. You were kinda boring and your bangs were not good. Also, Gossip Girl has no place for people with ethics and morals. It’s a show for those that love plotting and bitching. Either get on or get out of the way. With Bad Bangs gone, it’s time for Eric to get a hot boyfriend. Or maybe reunite with some of his cute camp friends. While we’re on the subject, let’s have some flashbacks to camp time. Clearly, this was not the same camp in The Parent Trap.

Fighting with Jenny also brought the joy in Blair, who was like her old self again: condescending and rude. It was nice to have her back. But Jenny might have won this round, particularly after delivering this line: “Your era is over. And so is that headband.”

What the hell is going on with Chuck? Is Ed Westwick filming a movie or something? Because his screentime has been so diminished this season so far. In fact, one of his major scenes in this episode was just a disembodied voice in the elevator. Um that is not the quality time we GG viewers need. Still, that ended up being a really nice scene between Blair and Serena and really showed off the chemistry between Leighton Meester and Blake Lively. As much as I enjoy them being at each other’s throats, it’s nice to have them back to being friends too.

Nate seems to be in the same black hole as Chuck. But I’m guessing this has more to do with Chace Crawford getting prepped for Footloose. Or I could be wrong. Also, what in the hell happened during that “lost weekend.” Do we think Chuck got it on with those ladies? While they were wearing Blair’s lingerie? Um, because that is not classy.

I could care less about Tripp and his dumb political campaign. Snooze. But I kinda like Serena becoming the Other Woman. She totally seems like the girl who gets embroiled in some kind of political scandal and ends up on the cover of the New York Post. Also, I love that she showed up to his office after the cotillion party wearing a not-so-appropriate dress. Like, S, couldn’t you have changed into some jeans or a Juicy Couture sweatsuit.

So, it appears Serena’s father is attempting to make his way back into her life. And he’s a doctor? Did we know that? Interesting.

What did you think of last night’s Gossip Girl? Did the threesome live up to the hype? Are you loving Jenny the villain?

Comments (198 total) Add your comment
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  • T to the B

    You’re right … the much hyped threesome wasn’t the best part of the episode. My favorite part was when Blair took over as Jenny’s mentor, only to be backstabbed. I heart Blair Waldorf.

    • Dee

      Completely agree. My favorite part was when Eric teamed up with Blair. I kind of hope Eric is the new blair and somehow becomes King B. Is that possible? Wouldn’t it be awesome if it became true. Scheming Eric is awesome.

      • the future

        3-some should have been Jenny..Chuck..Nate..that would have put Blair in her place

      • GG-master

        Eric is terrible…time for a bus to hit him…bring in somebody else…this show rocks when it stays youth-focused..the old folks are boring..and what is with this reviewer…all he does is try to push his more gay agenda down our throats…bet he loves that..lol..

      • softlysosoftly

        yes…Eric should be disposed of…drags down every scene he is in..

      • AnonymooseBlog

        Eric would be a horrible “queen” because he is too good! Thought that seems to be changing! I can’t see him taking her down, but eh can definitely cause trouble since she has no idea he is working against her! That is probably the juiciest part of this whole thing! He attacks her and she just blames it on Blair! Loves it!

      • S

        I think they could do a lot with Eric, make hism hotter, taller, steal Jenny’s bf again lol. Jenny makes a really good Queen, but i think she should be wary of Blair, she just asnt as good as Queen B

      • saintofE69th

        S,

        They could do a lot with Eric..a whole tear-jerker episode about his second “successful” suicide attempt..funeral would be the best thing this show could do to get rid of a horrible horrible character that diminishes the whole show..I think the actor is ok it is the way the part is written..way to cliche

    • Robbyrob

      GG master,

      If your so sick of the gay agenda being shoved down your throat…oops, then why, oh why are YOU even reading a recap of Gossip Girl???? Chuck, as written in the books is clearly bisexual…I guess that didn’t bother you. Do you even read? It’s also pretty lazy brain power to come up with your gay puns. Newsflash to GG master: The entertainment world is pretty gay. Gay people are your neighbors, siblings, parents, and friends with all sorts of professions and age ranges represented. If we have to read your uneducated posts, then you can certainly tolerate Tims. Just don’t read the offending sentences and you’ll be fine. I mean, relax dude or dudette. Reading anything from a gay writer won’t make you gay, just like by reading your post won’t make me a hateful person. Tah.

      • GG master

        easy tiger…no propblem with alot of what you and say and agree with most of it.just ot ask for a more even-handed approach is not anti-anything…

      • Bronze Star

        Agree with GG relax just to ask for a review that is not so slanted is not an offense and there is no need to get personal in attacking someone’s comments

      • Clarice

        I agree with GG I embrace all people but it seems if anyone every raises an opposing idea to anything gay they get the kinda treat R is dishing out..GG is a great show and GG master is entitled to his/her view please do not demean others becuase they look at it differently than you R

      • NYCBrad

        Gossip Girl has always belonged, and will always belong, to the gays first and foremost!!

      • hmm

        how is this not an even handed recap? merely expressing a wish for more gay characters or more screen time for the gay character is not even handed? if tim stack wrote that he really wanted to see more chuck/blair screen time would you say he was pushing a straight agenda?

      • broadwayreallybroadway

        hmm,

        it is not just this review it is the constant drumbeat I like tim’s writing but I see the point of those that fel he is slanted and pushing for more gayness that being said I would like more bisexy chuck off to a show toodles straight people and gay people who feel they have to lash out at straight people who question things

      • demented

        Personally all the squeey gaycentric stuff just ends up making this columnist sound like a giggly yaoi fangirl who gets defensive if anyone says, “Hey, enough with the teehee-I-wish-everyone-was-gay” stuff.

    • ellen

      belong..shows don’t belong to anyone…you are delusional try looking at something from someone else’s perspective once

  • TheObserver

    All this talk of people against a threesome that was totally chaste. they kissed each other and then in the end they had that shot of all three of them in bed together…not at all racy. I buy that Vanessa would take any opportunity to get it on with Dan, she never seemed quite over him. But its weird…I mean…she dated his brother for petes sake! Also I do not like Serena becoming the other woman and the whole political backlash this will cause. for jaded upper east siders it seems that they would and should know better. Eric should get off of Jenny’s back and appreciate the kind of pressure she’s under, his counter-scheming seems more like jealousy to me though I do appreciate his fear of losing Jenny to the dark side, though its odd since he has no objection to his sister (Serena) being friends with the Queen of all Queen B’s Blair. We need more Chuck and more Nate…I’m sorry but Dan doesn’t qualify as guy candy. Oh…and is Duff going to become a regular? I’m curious cause she wasn’t toally bad…and one last thing…does any bar or club in new york check ID? these kids are years away from 21 and are constantly consuming copious amounts of alcohol! seriously! forget being up in arms about the threesome that was totally PG… One of these kids is gonna develop a substance abuse problem!

    • ALE guy

      nop eno ID checks much…right about Eric…write that turd off…Duff’s arc about over…Jenny rocks wish she had been in 3-way…with S and Nate

      • J Girl

        Jenny is 16 in real life, so the GG writers are very careful about the scenes she’s in. People freaked out when she made out with Nate last season. It was a ll strange considering he’s so muh older in real life.

      • blowupdoll

        yea, but that was lame threesome just a girl/girl kiss and three people lying in bed…Little J could do that…Taylor M is sooooo hot

    • S

      I dont know that ID’s exsist in the GG universe. I wouldn’t mind seeing jenny kiss nate again, or see nate kiss anybody but his last fling, buckly…boring something like that. And i think Serena should get the substance abuse problem, seems like a natural course for the way the writers are sending her. I think the 3some was just hype for the show, as if we really care that hilary duff shared dan with vanessa. It was like the three lamest characters got lamer together. Vanessa and Dan should do it and Serena should get pissed about it, so then she gets back with dan and i dont care that their parents are married lol

      • broadwayreallybroadway

        how about Vanessa and Rufus with Lilly that would be spicy oh my!

    • DNW

      And Chuck qualifies as guy candy? I know people are attracted to him bcuz of the bad boy thing, but he is one strange looking dude. Penn’s at least attractive off the show in pics.

  • Becky

    This episode was ok. The hyped up threesome turned out to be no big deal. There have been way hotter scenes with Blair and Chuck. And I totally agree with the recap…Chuck needs more screen time! I did love Blair, Eric, and Kira going up against Jenny but as soon as Nate showed up in a tux, you kinda knew how she would save face. Jenny has become a lot more interesting since she’s become “queen”. I guess my real question is…as much as I love Blair is she ever going to move on from high school?

  • Aagumb1

    The best part was Jenny and I disagree about her outfit. It was killer & the gloves were perfect! Her clothes are more ultra hip/rockstar daughter (which she is) vs. teen soshes who lunch.

  • Stephanie

    I don’t get why Nate is such a catch though-I mean it was two years ago that he escorted B. Wouldn’t he be old news by now? I also agree with Dee above that Eric should be the new ruler of the UES. I like B more than S and E more than J. I also agree that we need more Chuck/CHAIR-that couple is what keeps me tuning in to GG so they better step it up. I do like Aaron Tveit as Tripp so I hope he hangs around even if it means S will continue to be a whore.

    • Ace

      But he is in college! Clearly that means he trumps every other escort that is at the high school level! *sarcasm*

      • Q

        I also totally question this! What, do you just get to cheat and pick a college guy, and that trumps the Best Escort high school guy? Sounds like a gigantic loophole to me. My thought would be, if Nate is such an It guy, why would he be hanging around a cotillion a year later?

  • Pammi21

    Agree with pretty much everything, except, Eric and Jenny could NEVER be gayer than Blair and Serena.

    • Gabby

      Srsly. Blair and Serena just need to get it on – they are clearly the love of each others’ lives. Luv B and S!

  • Katie

    Looks like Gossip Girl/CW really chickened out with this “threesome” – this, coupled with that LAME “gay kiss” just proves this show is all hype, no substance.

    No wonder the ratings are at an all-time low for this show…

    • Katie

      WOW
      Just read the show is going on HIATUS in January….never a good sign

      *tick, tock, tick, tock* – cancellation axe is sharpening…..

      • Remy

        The show almost always goes on hiatus for a few months in the winter. It’s nothing new, it’s just how CW does its scheduling.

      • Gina

        CW shows ALWAYS go on hiatus during the winter/Christmas/New Year months. Pipe down.

      • voyager

        rhhhrrrr…catfight..continue…dump eric..another suicide try (good luck this time)….jenny jenny.jenny…lame 3-some…c’mon…

      • Sammy

        Gina, what are you yakking about? Gossip Girl is being REPLACED by another show in mid-January (way past Christmas, in case your brain can’t process that).

        Please do a bit of research before you babble next time.

      • J Girl

        Actually heard they aready know they are renewed for next season. Ratings are lower because they are on at 9 now instead of 8. GG isn’t going anywhere. The rating aren;t really high but they are still very good for the CW, and the show gets more hype than any other show on the network.

  • Dina

    You kidding? Teh 3some was the most memorable thing in the ep! How many times am I going to see BS reconcile? Or Nate do nothing? Or Jenny be a bitch?! Even though, yay for evil Eric! And yeah, it’s time to bring in the hot bf for that kid.

    Let’s not act like Dan doesn’t want V too, lol.

    • Clarice

      Eric is horrible please writers dump him rest of show is awesome

  • BLM

    “You were kinda boring and your bangs were not good.” Hahahaha! Almost spit out my coffee! I liked this episode. For the first time ever, I thought Blake Lively’s acting was really good when she was talking to Blair in the elevator. My favorite moments: when Chuck asked Blair and Serena to kiss each other when they made up and when Blair yelled “SERENA! I mean, Serena” when she caught Serena with Tripp at the end.

    • Q

      Agree, watching B&S together was sublime. That line at the end was the best, well done L.M.

      • S

        Couldn’t anybody else tell that Blair was pissed at the end of the episode? She blew off Chuck(and really who does that?) for serena who blew her off to hang out with another woman’s husband. I hope Blair puts serena through the ringer again.

  • Sheri

    Threesome= totally predictable and SNOOOZE!! I hope next week’s “flashbacks” are better..

    I’m glad I’m not the only one who thinks Hilary Duff and her fake teeth are the epitome of anti-sexy.

    My hubby actually watched with me last night, and suggested Chuck, Nate and one of those whores should have been the threesome. How AWESOME would that have been!!

    Go Go Bitchy Jenny!! I dont believe for a minute she’s going to run the Queen Bee mafia over those other girls, but heck, we’re talking about GG here.

    Am I alone on the Serena is a skank factor? Really? Nate, Dan, Carter, Aaron, now Tripp? SHEESH!!

    • J

      Yes! Stop hating & call it both ways… Look at Nate: B, S, lil J, V, the married cougar, Bree Buckley… what would be “scandalous” on the Upper East Side if they were all in commited relationships?!

    • Jennifer

      Skank factor indeed, the only guy she hasn’t tried is Rufus. I remember when she got Lily to break up with Rufus because it was too wierd him being her boyfriend’s dad.

      • S

        I wish Dan and Serena would get back together just to stop serena from whoring around again… maybe Vanessa should figure out she’s les,and fall for serena who would after all sleep with almost anyone this season. And in Nate’s defense… he is a man whore but a damn sexy one, and probably still in love with blair

      • broadwayreallybroadway

        S,
        lik eyour take on V as les or at least bisexy…her and serena would rock…maybe with a slighly older college guy…or just hose two..hottttt

  • Amber

    Serena should hook up with Tripp and cause public scandal. Its her specialty. And I need a shake up in my plotlines, something juicy (a neutered threesome starring Hilary Duff doesn’t count).

    • bowser

      yes S and tripp JFK and jackie for a new age

      • J

        I like it! Especially since we know Tripp’s wife is a manipulative b*tch!

  • nina

    I loved this episode, it was the best so far, although I am not sure about Nate and Chuck disappearing all thetime. I just hope that it was Vanessa instead who got the axe.

  • Kat

    Tim – I thought the same thing about Jenny vs. Eric being another version of the Blair vs. Serena dynamic. Love the direction this is going in esp that Eric has a new partner in scheming. Team Blair, always! I don’t think Chuck had sex with those girls & I loved Blair’s blase attitude when she was at Chuck’s picking up an outfit. Good & entertaining episode.

    • Zone312

      Eric is sooo weak..run him out of here on a rail…you think Chuck had those girls there and did nothing….grow up…

      • S

        I almost agree, Blair seems to trust Chuck an awful lot. I wish Chuck would do soemthing bad boy again, but keep it so that Blair could forgive him, id like to see a threesoem with Blair chuck and nate ahahahaha

      • broadwayreallybroadway

        S,

        dig your threesome cast..with you on need for chuck to get “badder” again…time for chuck/blair split take characters down other paths let’s see more of college-life…loved the FatBlack Pussycat ref in this episode bathrooms there are yuck…

  • smokey gets in your eyes

    lay off the all the gay pushing….no problem with it being there but your reviews just ask for more more more…it is not cool…

    • Via

      I disagree.. I say bring on the gay! Hell, let’s see if we can sprinkle some tinsel on this recap and really make it merry and gay.

      • smokey gets in your eyes

        great comment….I respect your idea and no problem with quite a bit of gay just wish reviewer would be a little more even-handed and look at show from different perspectives

      • zod

        very funny Via tho I would like a little more unbiased view

    • Kramer

      yea nothing wrong with wishing for a “straight” view, but I do love “happy fellows” and happy girl characters for realism

  • Kat

    I hope Vanessa gets her ass handed to her next week. I cannot stand this character & wish she’d go away.

    • merchantof32ST

      agree Vanessa and Eric should die in a tragic Handsome Cab ride this holiday season…what a great ep to start the new year with!

      • smokey gets in your eyes

        damn that is funny….and a great way to get rid of two of the worst characters in TV history..

      • ger

        “Handsome Cab”. Yep, that’s funny.

      • Kramer

        Handsome cab after horse eats beenie wiennies

    • S

      No she cant die!!! We need her to fall for dan to upset everybody so that blair can finally run her out of the upper east side forever, then come back as a devious and actually entertaining character

      • saintofE69th

        yea just kill eric in the handsome cab accident or maybe a ballon from the Macy’s parade take shim away alah “ballon-boy” let V and Rufus get it onnnnnn!

      • yyyyyy

        hell ya…Rufus and V that woul dbe cool…..let Lilly mess up and teh R-man can take V for a ride on the 90’s train evey watch how those two look at each other sometimes….hmmmm is it the characters or the actors? Also, please get rid of S’s little pile of poop brother so out of place

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