I hope everyone is limbering up their speed-dialing fingers RIGHT THIS SECOND, because we’re about 24 hours away from the very first episode of American Idol‘s eighth season finals, after which you can vote for whatever contestant rocked Michael Jackson night the hardest! (And the whole world has to text or else call, just to tell you once again: Who’s bad?!?!) I am shocked to report that I got a sudden surge of the internal squealies as I typed that last sentence, despite the fact that none of this season’s top 13 contestants has yet to turn me into a megafan. (Allison Iraheta, you’ve come the closest. Do not disappoint me and choose something atroshe like "Ben" or "Heal the World.")
Anyhow, I am rambling. This is what happens when you spend days and weeks in the Idol Cave. But let me get to the point: We just finished up a brand-new two-part episode of Idolatry — a top 13 preview!!! — and I’ve taken the liberty of embedding it below. Part one finds Jessica Shaw and me discussing which contestants we’re most looking forward to hearing on Tuesday, and who’s likeliest to get das boot on Wednesday. Part two (which automatically plays when part one finishes, and features a can’t-miss cymbal-clang rant against the show’s most useless judge) is a debate about the things that matter in life: Paula, Kara, Simon, or Randy. You may choose only one today. So go to the message boards and make it happen — after you press play, and after you sign up for EW.com’s Idol Prediction Challenge. Failure to enroll in this most awesome of games carries a mandatory sentence of having to wear a combination of Simon’s t-shirts, Randy’s accessories, Kara’s scowl, and Paula’s weaves for the rest of the Idol season. Get signed up now, and remember you can change your vote right up until 7:59 p.m. Eastern Time on Wednesday night. So if/when Jasmine Murray someone chokes, you can change your elimination pick at the last minute. Holla! Hey-ey!
I heart you Michael Slezak- although I really disagree with your reservation with Adam Lambert (I personally kinda find him great) I think you are spot on when you say that Adam will be the interesting performer to watch. But for future reference, please do not compare him to Sanjaya as a non-sexually threatening heartthrob (if you do, please go with David Archuleta for that).
Matt Giraud is amazing…Michael I am disappointed that you don’t see his talent! He has real passion for the music business…and great skills! Watch out!
Slezack,
You are spot on this season! If it weren’t for your articles and Idolatry video clips I’d have long abandoned this train-wreck-of-a-season long ago. Listening to Jasmine Murray attempt to sing is like listening to an old person with a bad case of flatulence. Adam Lambert is sketch at best. The snarling, the tongue licking, screeching is absolutely embarrassing to watch. My vote goes with Alison. Her vocals keep me glued each week (yes, I am weak).
Michael and Jessica, things will be so much easier once you give in to the magic that is Adam Lambert. Yes, he is distrurbing and creepily sexual. Yes, he’s like every character in Waiting for Guffman multiplied times a thousand boys doing air guitar and making sex faces in front of the mirror. But he seems to be also 100% in earnest about it which is what makes him awesome. He is bound to bring the high entertainment value. Personally, I would happily show Megan Corkery the door. Overrated, can’t sing, twitchy dancing, not really all that cute and all – boom right out the door. I think Sarver will hang on for a while as he’s really the only choice for your country lovin’ fans. He’ll at least pull a Josh Gracin like run. As for Paula vs. Judge #4, I’ll just sit in the Amen corner. Judge #4 needs to take her package and go. She can take the Dawg with her on her way out for what that’s worth.
Totally agree about Paula being the best judge this season.
Micheal, I would love to have you make more of(touched on it in the video)Randy being Simon’s representative in this competition. I also think your pretty close with Kara but a little more crdit needs to be given her (not much)! I used to agree with Simon about 90% of the time in past years but he completely sucks this year and is obviously pushing through contestants who in no way should be in the 13 Wild card round. Paula should get an ovation this year for actually being the best judge by far. We would have had a lot different looking 13 than the ones we are stuck with now. Great job Paula!!!
Dog–Randy Jackson–useless comments, no constructive criticism to help the contestants… Adam Lambert creeps me out as well and he acts like he is in a musical instead of singing. I love the wiid card format, but more time and thought should have gone into the process. Maybe announce the 8 possibles on another show and have everone ready to perform at that point.
If you got to utube and watch Adam Lambert do “I make you Crazy” you will see his true talent. If he tries to be anything other that what he is, he will come off as fake. Most of america has not seen a male performer like this on a “big stage’. If American idol allows him, and he allows his self, and lets an unapologetic “Freddie Mercury” to come flying out, we are in for quite a ride!
He just might keep me watching this american idol “cast” this year.
Seriously Slezak, when did Matt kick your puppy?
Paula’s comments have been right on this season. Waaaay moreso than Simon, who has become the producer’s puppet–boosting Jasmine and Megan while killing Ricky Braddy and Kristen Stewart’s chances.
Paula has always been awesome–she’s making Kara look like a burned b*tch, and I always agree with what she says.
Why Michael’s songs? Why? Why? Why?
Idolatry: making lemonade(great video blogs) out of the lemon that is this season of Idol. Sigh. I wish I could get excited about this season. I find myself watching it with a sense of duty, as opposed to anticipation. I watch just in case it STARTS to get good, not because it IS. Paula is definitely less cracked-out this season. Randy seems to be phoning it in, and Simon seems kind of sick of the whole thing. I loved how Paula actually remembered contestants and their performances from Hollywood week, and the other judges were all amazed. Clearly they don’t feel compelled to do too much towards earning their million dollar paycheques. They seem to think they are there as hosts/personalities, not as actual judges who may be required to, you know, think about and remember the actual contestants.
“Is Paula making sense?” asked the cute guy on the other end of the couch. And I had to admit, rather than FF through her comments, I’ve been listening. Oh, and Michael, so glad someone else thinks Matt wears an asshat. Jessica, I showed the cute guy (AKA hubby) your reaction to Adam L. He thought it was perfect! The guy is beyond skeezy. I’m going to predict he’s out before the top five are chosen. I don’t care if Simon and Kara cry; he’s gotta go. And both of you called Kara perfectly. This is ‘the people’s’ chance to pick our ‘star’, and we’re not settling for some crummy package arteest!!
Anoop can sing. Youtube him now.
Ugh–so over AI. I say it every year. This is the BEST they could come up w/? I’ve heard better singers at Six Flags. Most of them sound like a combination of a cement mixer and a spin dryer full of zippers? I pray they are all quickly and painfully eliminated & the show promptly canceled. It will never happen, but I can dream.