Okay, a 'He-Man' movie? C'mon, really?

You know what? Here’s where I draw the line. This far and no further. Joel Silver and Warner Bros. are planning a live-action take on He-Man and the Masters of the Universe. You remember He-Man, don’t you? The muscle-bound hero of Eternia who battled the villainous Skeletor with the aid of a magic sword and a giant green tiger he rode like a horse? A shoddy ’80s cartoon concocted to sell a line of Mattel toys? Of course you do.

And you remember the first crappy live-action attempt at this material, 1987’s Masters of the Universe, starring Dolph Lundgren and Frank Langella? How could you forget it? I can’t…sometimes it keeps me awake at night.

So, clearly emboldened by the success of Michael Bay’s Transformers flick, they’ve launched into this. What they seem to have overlooked is that giant robots blowing stuff up is cool, will always be cool. Watermelon-thighed lunkheads shouting "By the power of Greyskull!" is not cool. Never really was. And Transformers has constantly been in the minds of geeks, nurtured by new TV series and comic book continuations. He-Man, not so much.

Am I wrong? Are you gonna be the first in line for Masters of the Universe when it hits screens in 2010? Are you as optimistic as this dude, who clearly thinks it’ll be the movie offspring of Lord of the Rings and Conan the Destroyer? Or will you, like me, run for the hills?

Comments (62 total) Add your comment
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  • Vicky

    “The muscle-bound hero of Eternia who battled the villainous Skeletor with the aid of a magic sword and a giant green tiger he rode like a horse?”
    Hahaha great description!
    When I was a kid, Skeletor use to scare the crap out of me. So it did leave an impression, but I don’t really need a live action movie. Not at all.

  • Matty

    You’re wrong. A lot of people loved He-Man in the 80s. Maybe you were too cool or not geeky enough, but it was very popular. A lot of people would love to see a comeback. A lot of those people have little kids now, which is what makes the timing so good. They’re not looking to make an artistic impression with He-Man. It’s a money grab, and a well-timed one at that.

  • jd

    i had fond memories of this cartoon. then i watched it recently on joost.com. WOW I WAS DELUSIONAL AS A KID.

  • QuestLuv

    I grew up on He-Man and even as a kid, I knew the movie sucked but I’d totally give it another chance as long as they stayed true to the story of the tv show with epic style and little winks to the series.

  • Adam

    Forget He-Man, I just want a comeback for Dolph Lundgren!!

  • JEFF

    whats next.. she-ra? and then will have strawberry shortcake .. care bears… and all the other cartoons that were out there..
    although i wouldn’t mind watching and paying for a GI Joe movie franchise.. that was my favorite cartoon of all times..

  • JT

    The comics and toy line were cool, but the Filmation cartoon was crap, and Frank Langella’s Skeletor was better than that movie deserved. But I’m willing to give this a shot, if they’d be true to the Eternia of the comic book and forget Orko.

  • ks

    I liked He-Man, my kids had every toy! I don’t know if I would like a remake. Just look at all the other remakes recently……

  • Liddy

    Will the movie have the same undercurrents of homoeroticism as the cartoon? And will Adam have a cat and wear the purple pants?

  • Mke

    I was absolutely a fan as a kid, but He-Man was for kids slightly younger than Transformers and (my favorite) GI Joe. So I grew out of He-Man before the latter two. The 80’s movie hardcore sucked- I even hated it back then, but I’m open to them redoing it and will, at the very least, rent the blu ray. Stoked on the new GI Joe but I DO know it’s gonna be a huge disappointment. Not that I’m expecting much. And Transformers 2? Same thing- I hate you, Micheal Bay, for being the one chosen by the studios to ruin Transformers.

  • Anonymous

    Well this summer should set the standard for the return of 80’s cartoons on the big screen with Transformers 2 and G.I. Joe.

  • dj

    i was 19 and saw Dolph Lungren’s “Masters of the Universe” TWICE in the theaters. ’nuff said. Good Journey.

  • Christy

    I am game…as long as the sequel includes…She-ra “Princess of Power” She rocked it on her magical pegasus!

  • Steve Barnes

    Why is the writer acting like a He-Man movie is suddenly news? There’s been a He-Man project in development for at least a decade. John Woo was attached once.

  • Whatever

    Old news, buddy. He-Man movie’s been around for almost two years. Get a clue.

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