Okay, even if this action figure wasn’t Duff from the Food Network’s porn-like series Ace of Cakes, I’d still want it on my desk. Maybe I just want cake. Whatever. The point is, I’m loving how virtually anything on TV warrants a toy at this point. We expect there to be action figures for action-driving characters from action-based shows, but suddenly there’s one for Shannon from Lost. Her toy is sunbathing. And her character is dead. I could not love anything more. So here’s your fake assignment: Think of a random TV icon whose action figure you’d die for, "Google it up" as my mother would say, and if it really doesn’t exist, put it on an imaginary wish list. I’ll start it off:
*Lucille Bluth, preferably wielding a cupcake (Arrested Development)
*"Comedy"-writing manatee (South Park)
*Grow house on fire (Weeds)
*"Special Agent Seeley Booth, with his ‘cocky’ belt buckle and festive socks!" –as uttered by Mandi, while she literally wiggled her feet. (Bones, this one deemed unacceptable due to lack of accessories)
*Mandi Bierly wiggling her feet (EW.com)
Play with us!
I love the Duff figure! Where can I find one?
Tim Gunn wielding the “coat hanger of justice”
I’ve got a few that I’d like to see, all of which would look great beside my bunny-suited Anya from “Buffy the Vampire Slayer.”
First, a Felicity Huffman action figure, complete with drunken dance moves set to “My Boogie Shoes.” Either from the second season of “Desperate Housewives” or the first season of “Sports Night.” I’m not picky.
Second, can we please get the Kathy Griffin “My Life on the D-List” line together already? Where’s my tattooed Jessica figure? Or my Maggie figure, complete with box of wine? Or even my destructive Chance and Pom-Pom, who get oddly calm when Cesar Milan’s Emmy-less figure stops by?
And I know its early, but can someone already get on making figures for “The Cho Show”? Margaret in a body painted dress, her parents with talking chips (that only play Margaret’s hilarious impressions of them) and as a special, hard-to-find figure, assistant Selene Luna in a Lambchop costume. Haven’t seen the episode yet, but I already know its gonna be hilarious!
Oh, and Nancy reminded me of one more. Tim Gunn is cool and all, but can we please get a figure of Chris March in drag? Was that the greatest and funniest episode of Project Runway or what?
Joey from Friends holding a meatball sub and saying “How you doin?”
Mary-Anne from “Cybil” with a drinky-poo in hand.
You can get almost anything made into an action figure:
http://blog.wired.com/music/2008/08/rock-band-2-ava.html
jack bristow holding a spork saying “whats a spork?”
Barney from How I Met Your Mother – suited up, naturally!
I’d love to see action figures of the kids from John & Kate Plus 8! They could each have a little toy that comes with them, like Alexis’ alligator or a train for Collin. And Aaden would have to come with his little glasses… how about even a little potty that comes with each of them! I’d also love to see some 30 Rock or The Office action figures.
How bout Pushing Daisies. With all those bright colors, that show is asking to be in action figure form. You can have the Pie Hole set. Ned can have this like flower that rises and falls in his hand (meaning bringing it back to life and so on). The Aunts can come in regular or synchronized swimming. Olive Snook could be a singing doll. And of course everyone comes with a pie in hand.
Omar with shotgun, complete with a button you press to hear “Farmer in the Dell.”
1. Lucien LaCroix action figures from “Forever Knight” – 1 in vamp mode (yellow eyes, fangs), 1 in Nightcrawler mode – black Nehru jacket with silver sword pin, silver ring. (And I wouldn’t mind one of him in full Lucius Roman toga gear with matching marble bust.) Also a three figure set of Nick, LaCroix and Janette either in Victorian clothes or Crusades gear. And a two figure set of Nick and Schanke.
2. Vamp Henry Fitzroy from “Blood Ties”. And three figure set of Vicki, Henry and Mike.
3. Entire range of Witchblade TV figures: Sara in ‘cop clothes’ (jeans, midriff-baring top and leather jacket, with Witchblade bracelet), Sara in Witchblade armor with Witchblade sword, Ian Nottingham all in black – hair pulled back, eyes cast down, Kenneth Irons in expensive suit, Gabriel in regular goth gear.
Want. Them. All. Now.
Whoops – forgot the set for the other “Forever Knight” shippers – a Nick & Nat set of course!
John McCain action figure: press his bald spot and he says, “At least I don’t plaster on the makeup like a trollop, you c*nt!”