You may have heard by now that the title of Christina Applegate’s new ABC sitcom has been changed from Sam I Am to Samantha Be Good — and the estate of Dr. Seuss is behind the old switcheroo! Apparently, Team Seuss didn’t want one of the all-time great lines from children’s fiction to become synonymous with a modern-day sitcom about a cranky lady suffering from amnesia. (Fair enough.) Anyhow, the whole back-and-forth between a powerful TV network and a mighty publishing dynasty inspired me to get my Seuss on — and tell the tale, Sam I Am–style. With much respect to the good Doctor, here goes nothin’… (after the jump)
That Applegate!
That Applegate!
I do not like
that Applegate!
Do you like,
or think she’s great?
I do not like her,
Applegate.
In fact, the vibe
comes close to hate!
Did you like her
in Jesse?
I did not like her
in Jesse,
or Married With Children,
can’t you see?
I do not like
Miss Applegate.
In fact, she makes me
quite irate!
Did you like her
when on Friends?
She won an Emmy,
a perfect ten!
I did not like her
when on Friends!
The Emmys suck,
let’s not pretend.
Her Golden Globe nod
did offend.
Her People’s Choice?
A bitter end!
I do not like this Applegate.
Her use of Seuss, it must abate!
Are you sure? She’s quite a lamb!
Allow her sitcom, Sam I Am!
Not Sam I Am!
Not Hop on Pop!
Not Grinch or Lorax,
Or Fox in Socks!
She’ll change the title, or I’ll lie in wait
And her show will meet a heinous fate
Such blasphemy, I shan’t tolerate
I do not like this Applegate!
Y’know what? This rhyming business is exhausting. We’ll just go ahead and call it Samantha Be Good. Thanks for nothing! We’re outta here.
Comments (1-23) of 23 Add your comment
I agree with the Suess people…sniping the name of one of the most famous books ever is not cool. However, this show will most likely be cancelled anyways…
Oh fabulous job, Mr. S. That was wonderful
And I’d have to agree with Seuss, too.
Slezak there’s no end to your greatness!
But I did like her in Anchorman.
(uh…)
I did not watch it in a can.
(Ah, screw it.)
She was funny in Anchorman, is what I’m saying.
OMGosh, you are ridic today. I mean first Tony the Tiger becoming a thespian and now this? Wow. Thank you for making my day. (p.s. She was good in “…Married With Children”)
How about this title? Cancelled!
Actually the name of the Seuss book is called “Green Eggs and Ham”. This show looks like a pork bi-product. Perhaps it should have been called “Sam is a ham”?
The news is looking thin. Why does anyone care, really?
Thanks, Slezak! I always appreciate your humor. But I have the sinking feeling that your poem took way more thought and time than anything Ms. Applegate’s writers will bother to script. I think I read that they’ve changed the name already-whew!
I am impressed,
I must confess.
Your rhyming is superb, no less.
perhaps a new rhyme you will create,
when this sitcom meets a timely fate.
No clever rhymes from me… but I happen to quite enjoy Christina Applegate’s work (for the most part). I loved “…Married With Children” in all its low-brow glory, and I’ll always have a special place in my heart for “Don’t Tell Mom the Babysitter’s Dead”
I’m actually looking forward to the show and i’ve always liked christina applegate. At least out of all the comedies slated for abc, this one looks the most promising.
oh slezak… you should get a tony and an emmy if not a pulitzer. this right here is prize winning journalism!
Sam I Am was a terrible title. And Samantha Be Good doesn’t sound any better. Can we call it something that maybe helps out with the show premise a little bit? Like “Total Blank” or something straight and to the point here? I’m rooting for Christina, I want the show to be good, but this title sucks.
What is with the constant barrage of negativity? In the past few days, I’ve read more negative posts (with even more vitriol piled in by readers) than is typical for this blog. May I remind you that none of us have seen the show yet! Did it cross your mind that maybe the show might turn out to be good?
Believe it or not, there are some of us who like the comedic talents of Christina Applegate, Jennifer Aniston, and Steve Carrell, but you’d never know it based on how much hatorade has been on here the past few days. Lighten up, people. Maybe you can spend a little more time being positive toward something rather than being so hypercritical of everything around you.
Don’t Tell Mom the Babysitter’s Dead is one of my favorite guilty pleasures.
We saw her on Broadway while she was doing Sweet Charity and she was awesome. She should be doing Broadway, not bad sitcoms.
The whole point is the Seuss folks were not feelin the title. There’s something definitely funny about them putting down their foot and making ABC chage it. It’s Seuss! Angry Seuss? Funny Seuss!
christina applegate is awesome! she definately held her own against Will Ferrel in Anchroman (“you have man-boos!”) and she masetered the dumb blonde teen shtick in Married… with children like a pro… I think youre wrong on this one and i dont care about the title as long as its good and she gets to be funny… besides- there have been other shows that have lasted with bad names…
Slezak, Slezak
Don’t be a hater
to kelly bundy
I was a master bater!
“I Am Sam” starred one Sean Penn;
The Seuss folks said OK, but then
They trashed Ms. Applegate’s new show.
To “Sam I Am” they all said “No!”
The moral? It is plainly seen.
Just sell out for the big screen.
Wow. You defintely have a lot of time on your hands to write something like this.
http://amwt.blogspot.com
that was hysterical Mozz
“Because I’m good at three things: fighting, screwing, and reading the news. I’ve already done one of those today, so what’s the other gonna be?”