I relocated from New York City to Los Angeles a year ago, excited for a different urban experience, yet knowing I was entering the dreaded Mecca of Hollywood youth culture. Having successfully lived here a year avoiding it, I foolishly decided to watch the premier episode of A&E’s dreadful reality show Sons of Hollywood on demand this weekend. An hour later, a little part of me had died inside and a big part of me was embarrassed to be an Angeleno.
The show focuses on a trio of nimrod best buddies: No. 1 is Aaron Spelling’s son (and Tori’s little brother) Randy, who is an aspiring actor and straight stud in these parts (according to the show). Buddy No. 2 is the really dumb aspiring musician Sean "Stewy" Stewart, a.k.a. Rod Stewart’s son (and Kimberly Stewart’s brother — Woot! I mean, Yuck!). Buddy No. 3 is some agent guy who I am sure I could look up but I don’t even care, although I will point out that he comes off as the smart one, which isn’t saying much. Anyway, they believe they’re pretty friggin’ special, so much so that the tagline for their show is "Real Life, Only Better" and their theme song, co-written and sung by Stewy, has something to do with being in the in-crowd. I don’t want to go into much detail because I don’t want to give the trio too much attention but here is just a sampling of what goes down in their better-than-us-real-people lives:
In Vegas, after losing all of his money at a card table, Stewy makes a manly toast to "Women, fine wine, fast cars and giving it from behind, baby!" (Yes he makes a chair humping gesture.) A couple of minutes later, I am not kidding you, as a quiet, daft, skinny, tan, blonde girl stares coyly at the ground, a passive-aggressive cotton-candy-throwing fight ensues between Rod’s son and Aaron’s son. The cotton candy brawl happened because one of them drunkenly said that they were gonna do something to someone with their big you-know-what and then the other retorted something like, "Oh yeah, but first I’m gonna hit you with my big you-know-what," and then cotton candy showed up and they started viciously hurling it back and forth at each other. (Don’t believe me? You can watch it here.) Why was Spelling so harshly cotton-candied? Here is Stewart’s explanation:"There is so much pressure on you, especially when your dad is a huge rock star."
The best part of Sons of Hollywood comes in around thefirst five minutes of the premiere episode. Agent Guy has announced ina voiceover that the boys are headed to Las Vegas. Early that morning,Spelling and Stewart are amusing themselves by badly playing pool,knowing that the limo is patiently waiting outside for them and thatthey are late. Agent Guy tries to get them away from the pool table andinto the waiting limo and then finally gives up, saying, "You guys aredumbasses!" I could not agree more! I want to live as far away from theSons of Hollywood as possible! New York City, will you find it in yourheart to please take me back?
But wait, now that I think of New York, I am reminded of the firstnimrods to hit A&E, the Gotti brothers! Oh no, what if A&E dida crossover program with the dumbest guys in New York and dumbest guysin Los Angeles? What would happen, PopWatchers? Even worse, what ifthey threw in a Bounty Hunter? Lastly, PopWatchers, if you’ve watchedan episode of this show, did you get through it without cringing? Couldyou watch another one? If you dare, Sons of Hollywood is on Sunday nights at 10:00 p.m. (Funny, that is the same timeslot that a good show about dumb, rich Hollywood guys airs on a little channel named HBO.)
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Crossing those two shows would be like crossing the streams and we all know what Egon said would happen if we did that.
whenever what’s his name was at the Dr.’s Office giving blood or whatever and he had that call from his agent and he said “If you put me on hold I will fire you” I switched the channel.. worst show ever!
Crossing these two shows would truly be the apocalypse!
That show was so painful to watch. The opening song was terrible. “Life of the in crowd.” They probably make more in one week with their allowances than what I make in one year. It doesn’t matter because my life and the life of my friends is way better than theirs. They are a bunch of rich kids who never had to work for anything and will hate themselves for not breaking the mold of their successful parents. I would rather write my own show or watch Entourage. I would never watch that stupid show ever again.
I just your description while sitting at my desk eating lunch and i think i little bit of it just came up….gross, they are probably trying to show off to show up the lack of their big things that they dont really have….you can buy alot with daddy’s cash, but you cant purchase a big di#$%ck
It would be funny if the Gotti Brother were hired for a HIT, and it turned out to be the Son’s of Hollywood they had to kill. I haven’t seen the show, but i did remember thinking, if this is the Hollywood InCrowd, then what is the crowd that all the talented actors and musicians hang out in? Cannot be the incrowd, cause if these three are equivalent of the incrowd, talent, looks, and charisma are not part of the incrowd equation.
maybe Dog the bounty hunter could kill them all….
“Sons of Hollywood” could also, easily, be called “Princes of Douchetown.” I couldn’t stop watching it, though – I had to know if the doucheyness was an act (a la Simple Life) or for real. Sigh, it was the latter, even when Aaron Spelling died. Despite the fact that AS was one of their fathers, at least show some respect for the man who invented guilty pleasure television for crying out loud!
It’s hard to believe how low A&E has sunk.
Saw the 1st epi of SofH- truly embarrassing, delusional & insipid. It makes me happy I decided to stop the weird addiction I was getting to the “Usweekly/people/internet gossip” triumvirate. The celebrrity worship has to be stopped.
I must say, no one comes off worse than Rod Stewarts son ( i cant even remeber his name). I actually felt sorry for Randy SPelling & wanted to give him a hug. Then I wondered WHY he was sctually friends with these dudes? WHich made me want to retract my hug & shake him into some sense since he actually seemed to have SOME redeeming quality in there.
THe tori Spelling appearance actually just reinforced what I thought about the whole thing-forced, very forced reality tv, wanna-be stardom.
I don’t see how anyone can invest the time to see the crap show. I would rather sit through a singing marathon of Sans-gina.
Aaron Spellings son gives me the creeps, always has always will.
Randy Spelling as someone to watch on television? Hilarious! I remember getting together with my friends to watch Malibu Shores solely to make fun of Randy and his character “Flipper”.
I couldn’t make it past the Sons of Hollywood theme song. The lyrics mention something about how they’re so “in”, but how it’s so lonely to be part of the in crowd, suggesting that no one really understands them. Too funny, but truly saddening.
Who are those kids?
Man, I feel for these guys. The hardships, the pressures. I mean, constantly asking yourself, does daddy really love me? It takes up all your time! I didn’t realize how great I had it. In addition to wondering if daddy really loved me (obviously, I haven’t spent nearly enough time on that issue!), I have to pay my own rent, go to some job behind a desk, EVERY DAY!, & pay off my college loans. (So, once again, no vacation this year!) Man, I had no idea of the how hard life was until I saw these guys. Thank god for celebrities!
I LOVE this show! The guys are sooo funny…I’m hooked!
The Stewart kid is awful. He’s always making gay slurs towards Randy. His so called “mentor” who hangs with him can only hide his eyes and lower his head everytime that kid opens his mouth. If I were Rod Stewart I’d kick him in the butt!
The Stewart kid is awful. He’s always making gay slurs towards Randy. His so called “mentor” who hangs with him can only hide his eyes and lower his head everytime that kid opens his mouth. If I were Rod Stewart I’d kick him in the butt!
How is this any worse than any other reality-TV show about “celebrities”? I agree with Tim – I can’t believe this is what serves as A&E’s programming nowadays. I also can’t wait for the person who tells me to shut off my brain and just be entertained like a moron.
I wonder what the A and E stands for now. It used to be Arts & Entertainment, but they don’t show anything artisitc or entertaining anymore. Maybe A**holes and Egos?
“Princes of Douchetown” – I’m still laughing at that one!
Loved your blog Katy…I somehow surfed to this site since I was wondering what others had to say about “Sons.” Actually I’m Rod Stewart’s AGE, a huge fan, and tuned in to A&E quite by mistake and continued watching. I agree with everything you said and would like to add: Having spent the last 5 years taking care of my 81 year old Mom who passed on last month I find it hard to believe that Randy could only muster up a cell phone call to his dying Dad. Where does he live? He can go to Las Vegas but he can’t go see his Dad? I guess I sound a little bitter. I don’t mean to be. I guess the show gives us a glimpse into the lives of the Hollywood scene.
Oh yeah, I forgot to add–I have alot more respect for Tommy Lee and Danny Bonaducci.
Sean Stewart attacked and assaulted my wife tonight. We were taking a side street home and drove passed a party they were at (1440 Miller Way, on 4/22 at approx 3:17am-see police report w. lasd.
Sean Stewart attacked and assaulted my wife tonight. We were taking a side street home and drove passed a party they were at (1440 Miller Way, on 4/22 at approx 3:17am-see police report w. lasd.
I love the show, and I think Sean Stewart is great. Having a son with ADD, who is now an adult, I can relate to the things Sean says and does. It’s funny how we can forgive when we understand, but when we don’t we find the worst in people. ADD is real, and what is worse, the drugs that are there to help, 73% of kids who take perscribed drugs for ADD end up addicted to drugs.