As Lady Miss Kier reminded us in an earlier blog item, today is Election Day. And now, according to a report on TMZ.com, Britney Spears has voted to end her marriage to backup-dancer-turned-rapper Kevin Federline. (View the divorce papers at PinkIsTheNewBlog, if that’s your thing.) It’ll be fascinating (and possibly nausea-inducing) to see whether election results or a suddenly single, hot-again Britney grabs the lead spot in tomorrow morning’s papers, although indecisive editors could merge their coverage by pointing out that on the day voters in a number of states decided whether gays should be allowed to marry, Spears took steps to dissolve her second traditional union — and less than two months after the birth of the couple’s second child, Jayden James.
That said, the most important question surrounding Spears’s decision (from a pop-culture standpoint, anyway) is this: Emancipated from the ever-embarrassing K-Fed, can Britney reclaim her vacated spot atop the pop charts? I suggest Britney reteam with Swedish hitmaker Max Martin, dust off the old "Baby (One More Time)" schoolgirl outfit, and retool the lyrics to that catchy debut hit. In fact, given that she’s probably got other things on her mind, we’ll pitch in with some suggestions for a first verse and chorus, as follows:
Oh baby, baby
Your raps left me so annoyed
You’ve really got no talent
Oh baby, baby
Prepare to be unemployed
I’m cutting your allowance
Now it’s time to pay the piper
Tell me baby
Have you ever changed Sean Preston’s dirrty diaper?
Xtina’s man, he’s got a job
And how ’bout you, you lazy slob? (Lazy slob!)
When I’m not with you my fans say "Wow!"
Look at me now
Shove it up your popozao
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I bet she dumped him because no one was showing up to his concerts and she doesn’t want to be associated with a (confirmed) loser. I bet if his shows were successful she would have stayed with him.
OMG BREAKING NEWS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *LOL*
Well, if its true then that’s good. They were a bad couple anyway.
Damn k-fed! The second she had the second kid you should have been trying for a third. We all knew the second she was no longer pregnant she would drop you like it’s cold….ice cold.
First Whitney & Bobby, now Britney and K-Fed. Good things come in threes — could Janet and Jermaine be next!?!?!
Way to lose that dead weight, divas!
No one care about Britney’s alleged come back. Her fans are no longer 12 years old and are hip to the fact that she could never sing and that dancing in videos doesn’t motivate you to go out and purchase a CD. Her life is filled with drama for the press because she lacked a solid talent to back herself up.
I bet her next album is number 1… people missed the old, over-sexed Britney and when she brings it back… all *ell will break loose!
I’m so excited… and oddly enough, I didn’t buy her albums when she first came out and I was… maybe 16 or so. But I bought her last one and will buy the next one. I get such good workouts to her music. I imagine how toned her body was in “I’m a Slave” and I’m not gonna lie… that’s what i strive for in the gym!
Speaking of his loser concerts – his performance tonight at the House of Blues in Chicago sold so poorly that they are giving tickets away for free and that still isn’t bringing them in.
I think it is sad when marriages don’t work out but come on, who did not see this one coming? It had divorce written all over.
Bet Shar Jackson is thinking “I told you so, Britney” today.
ABSOLUTELY SHOCKING NEWS.
Who get divorced next, Catherine Zeta-Jones & Michael Douglas? Matthew Broderick & Sarah Jessica Parker? Seriously guys, think about premarital counseling before you start marrying weirdos, OK all you Hollywood people? I mean, think of all Britney lost by marrying that clinger, Kevin? She has 2 beautiful children, but they still could have been born – with another man who could have been her one and only husband. I’m sick of all the excuses. Start taking responsibility!
It’s about freaking time. Regardless about what happend in his prior relationship, it was a RED FLAG when one leaves their pregnant ex for another girl. Yo go Brit.
I’m so happy right now…geesh, though. 4 Kids and 2 breakups
And this outcome wasn’t obvious from day one. It was about time she woke up and realized what a bum he is
Brooklyn B –I couldn’t agree more!
From what I hear, the music she has put out recently has been AWFUL now that she is trying to write. The girl doesn’t have talent.
THANK YOU GOD! I am so happy that Britney finally woke up and realized she was married to a loser. Wait for Federline to book appearances on talk shows to talk about his ex-wife. He is desperate for attention, you know he’ll do it.
I’m no Britney fan, but I like his “compare me to Jesus” (seriously: listen to the hidden track on his album. Okay…did I really just recommend that?) shtick a whooole lot less than I think she’s merely an overexposed, decent performer with a one-octave “voice”.
I think (okay…HOPE!) that after his already cancelled tour dates and tomorrow’s revealing of the gotta-be-decimating sales figures of his album, K-Fed has just had his Worst Week Ever. Is it me, or is it funny in here??
Now K-Fed…just GO AWAY!
Getting divorced is not just a “Hollywood” thing. Over 50% of marriages end in divorce. Just an FYI so you can breathe a little easier knowing it even happens to non-Hollywood folk in other areas. (gasp!) So take a deep breath and stop trying to tell other people what they should or shouldn’t be doing. I doubt you would want people telling you what to do with your life and how to live it.
Britney, you were wrong! Having babies with a man (especially a loser) doesn’t mean that he will be there to take care of the kids forever. He seems very immature.
Looks like Brit dropped more than just baby weight. Who had the under on them making it to 2007? Just one question–how long until K-Fed is doing some sleezy tell-all and then using that to parlay his way into the porno industry? Bet that’s coming next.
And if the elections don’t happen the way I want them to today, at least one person got it right today!!!! Woo Hoo…get him off my radio airwaves and out of Entertainment Weekly…..I can’t believe they let such a loser grace their pages.
Take that ya wigger piece of s**t.
awww, That’s too bad. After reading EW’s interview with K-Fed, I came to think that they were really perfect for each other. They’re both clinically retartded.
D-Vor-Say!
nooooooooo
I just read EW’s review on K-Fed today (for those who haven’t seen it, EW gave his album an F), and was, ironically enough, starting to turn a new leaf on my feelings about him.
I mean, at least the guy’s open about being a pothead. It explains so much, like why he thinks he can rap and why his eyes are red in all them interviews.
That said, I’m glad that Britney followed in Whitney Houston’s footsteps and has chosen to leave the loser harpy who’s been goldigging on her fame since day one.
Yay! Hopefully this is the last we’ll hear of that loser Kevin. I don’t know if Britney will be able to repair the damage to her career that the last couple years has done, at least very quickly, but if she puts out a decent CD, I’d probably buy it. She needs to get a lot less “country” though.
PS: Doesn’t her chest seem extremely saggy? I can’t help but notice it in like every photo. However, I’m no expert. Anybody?
Finally! a mature decision Britney! After a waiting period & a bit more maturing, hope Britney finds a decent husband/father in the future. And as far as that post about Kevin saying compare him to Jesus!? say WHAT? “Yo Kevin, you NEED a saviour! PLEASE drop your failing act and seek such.” I do not wish any of them “ill will” but I will say this (KEVIN), as you reap, so you sow! What goes around, comes around. And to Britney I would say: for your childrens sake, finish growing up already!? May this turning point not be a 360 but rather a 180. Japan reporting has a negative view of Britney because of her & Kevins much publicized “antics”. I really hope she can make a good life for her and her children. Its possible without hype & drugs, even in Hollywierd.
I’m not even sure where to start. We all knew this was coming, I’m just surprised that after Britney waited this long, that she didn’t wait one more day, just so the announcement could be released the same day as K-Fed’s sure to be PATHETIC sales debut on the Billboard charts, if he even sold enough to crack the Billboard 200!!! Those poor kids…And Britney is now one step further to fulfilling her role as a Southern White Trash Mom, 2 divorces, and 2 kids…
Hey Amber, don’t forget about her first husband! Kevin was #2.
Thank the lord, the girl has come to her senses! I love that she chooses to devulge such vital info on election day….way to swing the spotlight back to YOU, Miss Spears! (p.s. Slezak: utter brilliance)