Did you see the one about the sock-monkey gown?

Inspired by a brilliant — yes, imaginary, but still brilliant — Simpson Family Meeting over at GoFugYourself, I have composed the following imaginary e-mail from sartorially challenged Jessica to her imaginary stylist regarding a very real evening gown made entirely out of sock monkeys. (Click here to see photos and video of said frock — you know I wouldn’t steer you wrong.)

Stacey- Look I know you don’t think I know a DKNY from a Versachie, but the next time I step out for a public affair (LOL!) I want — no, wait — I NEED to be seen in this hot new sock-monkey gown I’m hearing about. You have to find it before anyone else on the pop scene (Cough! Ashlee! Cough! LOL! JK!) gets their grimy paws all over it! Make it happen! Okay? Seriously! Luv U! -Jess


Comments (5 total) Add your comment
  • Miranda

    I wouldn’t wear it but it does have a certain charm. I love sock monkeys!

  • Tyler D

    This only proves that GoFugYourself has a much funnier staff than EW.

  • Stephanie Travitsky

    Go Fug is hillarious, but me thinks that Jessie got a boob job and it is not her weight.
    I am not sure what poor Jessie was thinking when she chose that dress in that picture. First off it was too short (even if she is short herself), and a bit tight in the bust. If she was taller, maybe the dress could have worked. And finally, the sliked back Maria Sharapova ponytail look just ain’t working here. Personally the worst get up that I’ve have seen was Britney’s homage to the late Glen Hughes from the Village People with her leather man get up. Yuck!
    Sock Monkeys are cute, but that dress looks hideous. Give it to Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen. They will wear anything.

  • maple jenny

    There’s a matching bikini, too–the monkeys cover the puppies, so to speak. I’m totally serious–saw it on TV.

  • Sheeka

    When I was young I was terrified of sock monkeys. I can’t stop laughing at this pic!!!! Phobia healed… now if someone would do the same with clowns, I’d be all cured!

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