A silent-birth announcement

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  • Osman

    ummmmmmmm okk……….

  • LM

    Pfffhahahahaha! Scott, that was hilarious!

  • Vance

    lol …. oh shhhhhhh… sorry…

  • The Other Kyle

    And on the same day as Brooke Shields has a baby girl!!!
    Can you say star-crossed lesbian lovers?

  • Tim L

    I’m surprised they didn’t name the child Damian. That is what I would have picked personally.

  • Michael

    Brooke and Katie on the same day? How great would it be if their kids grew up to be Best Friends? That just made my day. Finally Katie popped out.

  • The Other Kyle

    I believe I was the first one to point out the Shields/Cruise connection, thank you!

  • Jessie Williams

    I think the way to better understand his alien highness (Cruise) is to look at his Scientology.
    Interesting read:

    http://www.rickross.com/reference/scientology/scien269.html

    Penthouse Interview with L. Ron Hubbard, Jr. (Founder of Scientologyy’s Son)
    Penthouse/June 1983
    Some highlights:
    Penthouse: Why do you think it’s so risky?
    Hubbard: My father drilled into all of us: Don’t go to court thinking to win a lawsuit. You go to court to harass, to delay, to exhaust the enemy financially, physically, mentally. You file every motion you can think of and you just lock them up in court. The courts, for my father, were never used to seek justice or redress, put to destroy the people he thought were enemies, to prevent negative stories from appearing. He just wanted complete control of the press –and got it.
    Penthouse: What exactly is Scientology?
    Hubbard: Scientology is a power-and-money-and-intelligence-gathering game. To use common, everyday English, Scientology says that you and I and everybody else willed ourselves into being hundreds of trillions of years ago –just by deciding to be. We willed ourselves into being ourselves. Through wild space games, interaction, fights, and wars in the grand science-fiction tradition, we created this universe –all the matter, energy, space, and time of this universe. And so through these trillions of years, we have become the effect of our own cause and we now find ourselves trapped in bodies. So the idea of Scientology “auditing” or ‘counseling” or “processing” is to free yourself from your body and to return you to the original godlike state or, in Scientology jargon, an operating Thetan –O.T. We are all fallen gods, according to Scientology, and the goal is to be returned to that state.
    Penthouse: And what is the Church of Scientology?
    Hubbard: It’s one of my father’s many organizations. It was formed in 1953, basically to avoid the harassment of my father by the medical profession and the IRS. The idea of Scientology didn’t really exist before that point as a religion, but my father hit upon turning it into a church after he started feeling pressured.
    Penthouse: Didn’t your father have any interest in helping people?
    Hubbard: No.
    Penthouse: Never?
    Hubbard: My father started out as a broke science-fiction writer. He was always broke in the late 1940s. He told me and a lot of other people that the way to make a million was to start a religion. Then he wrote the book Dianetics: The Modern Science of Mental Health while he was in Bayhead, New Jersey. When we later visited Bayhead, in about 1953, we were walking around and reminiscing –he told me that he had written the book in one month.
    Penthouse: There was no church when he wrote the book?
    Hubbard: Oh, no, no. You see, his goal was basically to write the book, take the money and run. But in 1950, this was the first major book of do-it-yourself psychotherapy, and it became a runaway best-seller. He kept getting, literally, mail trucks full of mail. And so he and some other people, including J. W. Campbell, the editor of Astounding Science Fiction, started the Dianetics Research Foundation in Elizabeth, New Jersey. And the post office kept backing up and just dumping mail sacks into the building. The foundation had a staff that just ran through the envelopes and threw away anything that didn’t have any money in it.
    Penthouse: People sent money?
    Hubbard: Yeah, they wanted training and further Dianetic auditing, Dianetic processing. It was just an incredible avalanche.
    Penthouse: Did he write the book off the top of his head? Did he do any real research?
    Hubbard: No research at all.
    Penthouse: Did your father do this just for money?
    Hubbard: Yes. The more he made, the more he wanted. He became greedy. He was really just interested in the use of money and power, wherever it was or whosoever’s it was. Morality and politics made no difference to him at all.
    Penthouse: Where did all this money come from? How much did it cost to be audited, in Scientology parlance?
    Hubbard: It cost as much as a person had. He had to stay in the organization, getting audited higher and higher, until he paid us as much as he had. People would sell their house, their car, convert their stocks and securities into cash, and turn it all over to Scientology.
    Penthouse: What did you promise them for this price?
    Hubbard: We promised them the moon and then demonstrated a way to get there. They would sell their soul for that. We were telling someone that they could have the power of a god –that’s what we were telling them.
    Penthouse: What kind of people were tempted by this promise?
    Hubbard: A whole range of people. People who wanted to raise their IQ, to feel better, to solve their problems. You also got people who wished to lord it over other people in the use of power. Remember, it’s a power game, a matter of climbing a pyramidal hierarchy to the top, and it’s who you can step on to get more power that counts. It appeals a great deal to neurotics. And to people who are greedy. It appeals a great deal to Americans, I think, because they tend to believe in instant everything, from instant coffee to instant nirvana. By just saying a few magic words or by doing a few assignments, one can become a god. People believe this. You see, Scientology doesn’t really address the soul; it addresses the ego. What happens in Scientology is that a person’s ego gets pumped up by this science-fiction fantasy helium into universe-sized proportions. And this is very appealing. It is especially appealing to the intelligentsia of this country, who are made to feel that they are the most highly intelligent people, when in actual fact, from an emotional standpoint, they are completely stupid. Fine professors, doctors, scientists, people involved in the arts and sciences, would fall into Scientology like you wouldn’t believe. It appealed to their intellectual level and buttressed their emotional weaknesses. You show me a professor and I revert back to the fifties: I just kick him in the head, eat him for breakfast.
    (My mother was lying on the bed and my father was sitting on her, facing her feet. He had a coat hanger in his hand. There was blood all over the place.)
    Penthouse: Did it attract young people as much as cults today?
    Hubbard: Yes. We attracted quite a few hippies but we tried to stay a way from them, because they didn’t have any money.
    Penthouse: A poor man can’t be a Scientologist?
    Hubbard: No, oh no.
    Penthouse: What do you think of the great popularity of cults in this country?
    Hubbard: I think they’re very dangerous and destructive. I don’t think that anyone should think for you. And that’s exactly what cults do. All cults, including Scientology, say, “I am your mind, I am your brain. I’ve done all the work for you, I’ve laid the path open for you. All you have to do is turn your mind off and walk down the path I have created.” Well, I have learned that there’s great strength in diversity, that a clamorous discussion or debate is very healthy and should be encouraged. That’s why I like our political setup in the United States: simply because you can fight and argue and jump up and down and shout and scream and have all kinds of viewpoints, regardless of how wrongheaded or ridiculous they might be. People here don’t have to give up their right to perceive things the way they believe. Scientology and all the other cults are one-dimensional, and we live in a three-dimensional world. Cults are as dangerous as drugs. They commit the highest crime: the rape of the soul.
    Penthouse: Do you mean killed?
    Hubbard: Well, he didn’t really want people killed, because how could you really destroy them if you just killed them? What he wanted to do was to destroy their lives, their families, their reputations, their jobs, their money, everything. My father was the type of person who, when it came to destruction, wanted to keep you alive for as long as possible, to torture you, punish you. If he chose to destroy you, he would love to see you lying in the gutter, strung out on booze and drugs, rolling in your own vomit, with your wife and children gone forever: no job, no money. He’d enjoy walking by and kicking you and saying to other people, “Look what I did to this man!” He’s the kind of man who would pull the wings off flies and watch them stumble around. You see, this fits in with his Scientology beliefs, also. He felt that if you just died, your spirit would go out and get another body to live in. By destroying an enemy that way, you’d be doing him a favor. You were letting him out from under the thumb of L. Ron. Hubbard, you see?

  • keli

    OK, Didn’t Mimi Rogers say Tom “shot blanks”? Didn’t Nicole miscarry shortly after their separation? Tom is the biological father of Katie’s baby? Sounds like a soap opera….

  • anna

    I am happy for Tom.
    yet I rather prefered a boy!
    Suri is sweet!

  • anna

    I am happy for Tom.
    yet I rather prefered a boy!
    Suri is sweet!

  • johnathan

    Haikus are good to
    us. What better occation
    than small tomkat birth?

  • Mark

    Alas, it is here,
    (Placenta tastes delicious)
    Someone tell Xenu!

  • Michael

    Please Jesse Williams
    Feeble brains can’t take the words
    Haikus are better

  • Aramis

    “——————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————” back at you!
    =P

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