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Tag: Summer Movie Body Count (1-10 of 17)

Summer Movie Body Count: Things get bloody with 'Conan the Barbarian', 'Fright Night'...and 'One Day'?

As many of the writers at EW can attest, we live and die by the notion that the pen is mightier than the sword. Of course, we’d last roughly about thirteen seconds into Conan the Barbarian if we went around wielding some Bic in the face of blood-thirsty warriors (Sword: 1, Pen: 0). We’d probably need something a little sturdier to ward off Colin Farrel’s handsome vampire in Fright Night, too (Vampire: 1, Sword: O). Still, the power returns to the pen’s hands by the time we roll around to the big screen adaptation of One Day…and a main, beloved character gets written off in a truly depressing way. We…win? You know the routine, PopWatchers: MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD for Conan the Barbarian, Fright Night, and One Day! READ FULL STORY

Summer Movie Body Count: 'Final Destination 5' portrays an America in the process of infrastructural breakdown

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We’re in the home stretch of EW’s Summer Movie Body Count, our brave attempt to provide a coherent catalogue of every onscreen death in a major release during Hollywood’s blockbuster season. Fortunately for us overworked, underpaid obituarists at PopWatch HQ, Week 15 was dominated by a film that could practically be titled Body Count: The Movie: Part 5. Did the latest entry in the Final Destination series fall victim to the Curse of the Fivequels? Read on… (Warning: Spoilers for 5inal De5tination, 30 Minutes or L5ss, and The H5lp follow…)

Final Destination 5 (henceforth 5inal) provides us with a difficult statistical anomaly: How do you count people who die twice onscreen, when both deaths are extraordinarily vivid, gory, and hilarious? READ FULL STORY

Summer Movie Body Count: 'Rise of the Planet of the Apes' kills adorable apes, terrible humans

Week 14 of EW’s 2011 Summer Movie Body Count continues with Rise of the Planet of the Apes, which PETA has practically crowned the Citizen Kane of Animal Movies since all its simian characters are CG, thus sparing real animals unnecessary abuse. Nevertheless, there’s plenty of animal cruelty depicted — man on ape, ape on man, ape on ape, ape on Slytherin, so… Warning: SPOILERS AHEAD!

Fan of the 1968 original and its sequels might be a little confused by the setting of the new film. No maniacs have blown Earth up, so there’s no one to damn to hell yet. Things are actually looking pretty good for the homo sapiens: present-dayish San Francisco looks like a place Mark Zuckerberg would recognize, and the chimps are in laboratory cages, guinea pigs for James Franco’s tests to cure Alzheimer’s. [Note: The actor James Franco is NOT actually working to cure Alzheimer’s at this time. I know, I had to check, too.] READ FULL STORY

Summer Movie Body Count: 'Cowboys & Aliens' killing spree fueled by fashion

Week 13 of EW’s 2011 Summer Movie Body Count continues with Cowboys & Aliens, in which Daniel Craig and Harrison Ford keep trying to avoid Olivia Wilde, but she’s always there; and also, there are aliens in the Old West. 

I like magical things and accessorizing, so Cowboys & Aliens was the perfect movie for me to attend last night. My assignment was to tally how many people and aliens died on-screen for EW.com’s Summer Movie Body Count. Aside from some extreme close-ups of alien innards, the cinematic battlefield wasn’t nearly as gory as I’d expected. Imagine my surprise when it turned out that all Daniel Craig’s Jake Lonergan had to do in order to kill those totally-not-cute E.T.s was… [Warning: SPOILERS and EXCLUSIVE JEWELRY SCOOP ahead]

READ FULL STORY

Summer Movie Body Count: Captain America kills tons of people (but they all deserved it)

Week 12 of EW’s 2011 Summer Movie Body Count continues with Captain America: The First Avenger, in which Chris Evans is transformed from a scrawny wimp into a depilated Nazi-killing hunk. Warning: This post has more SPOILERS than a muscle-car convention. But if you love your country (and/or costumed beefcake), we bet you’ll read it anyway.

In keeping with America’s global image as a non-violent, neutral peacekeeper, Captain America: The First Avenger has zero deaths. Thank you for reading.

Joke! The whole fun of this movie is watching the Cap’n crunch some evil Nazi skulls during WWII. But he’s not the only one who gets in on the action. In fact… READ FULL STORY

Summer Movie Body Count: 'Harry Potter' and the Murky Mortality Muddle

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Week 11 of EW’s 2011 Summer Movie Body Count continues with Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows — Part 2. We expected this to reignite the debate over whether a certain someone technically dies, but we didn’t anticipate how difficult it would be to count the dead at the Battle of Hogwarts with the variety of curses, quick camera shots, and changes from the book. To be added to our list of casualties, you must die onscreen or have your lifeless body displayed. Let’s discuss, but keep it civil. Warning: SPOILERS AHEAD!  READ FULL STORY

Summer Movie Body Count: R-rated 'Horrible Bosses' has fewer casualties than 'Cars 2'

Week 10 of of EW’s 2011 Summer Movie Body Count moves along with the raunchy comedy ‘Horrible Bosses’. While the characters in this funny flick don’t abide by any laws, morals, or rules, we most definitely do. Well, at least when it comes to the Body Count (give yourself a refresher on our guidelines for how this whole operation works here.) Now, as we always warn, there are some MAJOR SPOILERS ahead, so if you don’t want to know which characters don’t make it to the end credits, stop right here. Or, at the very least, duck out of work right now and take in a matinée. Your boss will understand.

Summer Movie Body Count is sort of like an Oprah giveaway episode in that it’s always full of surprises (and they may make you totally freak out.) We don’t just mean crazy, unexpected deaths, like when someone literally gets surprised to death. Rather, we refer to the difficulty of predicting how many (or how few) people will die. They just don’t make it easy on us like they used to. 8 Heads in a Duffle Bag? We could have easily guessed how many people die in that one (…eight, right?). READ FULL STORY

Summer Movie Body Count: 'Transformers: Dark of the Moon' proves that the PG-13 rating has failed

Week 9 of EW’s 2011 Summer Movie Body Count continues with Transformers: Dark of the Moon, which features no bloodshed and yet somehow also some of the most gruesome deaths yet this summer. Warning: SPOILERS AHEAD!

Transformers: Dark of the Moon is the movie that proves once and for all that the PG-13 rating is the single worst thing to ever happen to the American cinema. Imagine pulling aside your average John and Jane Q. Moviegoer back in the very early 1980s and describing the film’s plot to them: “Well, the vast majority of the population of Chicago is massacred. Dozens of fleeing citizens are simply disintegrated right in front of your eyes. Several characters get sliced or bodily torn apart. And at the climax of the movie, the film’s sociopathic protagonist rips off one villain’s face and shoots the other villain in the back of his head, execution-style.” READ FULL STORY

Summer Movie (Auto) Body Count: Getting mileage out of a surprising amount of car-nage in 'Cars 2'

Week 8 of of EW’s 2011 Summer Movie Body Count continues with Cars 2 as Lightning McQueen and his pal Mater race back to the big screen for more merchandise-friendly action, while some of their co-stars get sent to the big chop shop in the sky. But, much like the world of auto racing there are certain rules that you must abide by, so be sure to read up on our guidelines. Warning: Dangerous curves and spoilers ahead!

During the second installment of this year’s Summer Movie Body Count (ah, what a simpler time when there were only 155 fictional on-screen deaths to keep track of), my colleague Darren Franich pondered if the disgusting, faceless vampires who met their end in Priest actually counted, as it was questionable whether or not they had a soul. He ultimately came to the conclusion that while the MPAA may not consider their deaths tragic, EW does. Hey, we have a soft spot for vampires of all kinds. READ FULL STORY

Summer Movie Body Count: The soul-sucking Parallax lays waste to 'Green Lantern'

Week 7 of EW’s 2011 Summer Movie Body Count continues with Green Lantern. For those of you who do not possess a green ring of power that can download information into your memory, here’s a reminder of the rules. SPOILER ALERT: Things are about to get messy!

In Green Lantern, the film’s big bad Parallax — a soul-sucking embodiment of fear itself capable of decimating whole planets — is responsible either directly or indirectly for 93 percent of all the on-screen deaths. That is quite likely the highest percentage of loss of life attributable to a single entity in a movie yet this summer, impressive considering how little screen-time the undulating cloud of yellow-tinted despair really had in the film. So let’s break it all down, shall we?  READ FULL STORY

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