Funny or Die’s feature-length Steve Jobs biopic starring Justin Long has arrived. It’s long. It features at least one scene of virtual sex and two acid trips. It’s not fair to call iSteve (written and directed by Ryan Perez) a 78-minute sketch — it’s actually a movie, mostly. (“Cut entirely on iMovie,” the credits tell us.) Long’s Jobs himself speaks to us from a velvety-dark room. Is it heaven? What it is is a version of Jobs’ life from the peanut gallery: He’s a “renegade, a rebel, one of a kind, a bit of a loose cannon, a maverick, anti-establishment, a free thinker, a genius of sorts, a craftsmen, an engineer, a prophet and a poet, rolled into one.” Everyone else is either writing him sad letters on notepad paper (hi, Steve Wozniak!) or giving him good ideas to steal. Like I said: virtual sex.
Here are the five best moments from iSteve’s, the not-exactly-definitive story of Jobs’ life: