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Tag: Richard Simmons (1-5 of 5)

Best of 2011: Viral video edition!

The first 10 years of the new millennium brought us Christian the LionAntoine Dodson, and some formerly floppy-haired Canadian kid you may have heard of named Justin Bieber, so how has the first year of this decade shaped up, virally speaking? Well, let’s see… hydrangeas were pronounced hateful (or, to be more accurate, loathsome), Beauty and the Beast got the West Hollywood treatment, a respected newsman collapsed into giggles over a Frenchman’s urine, a teen shot to stardom by serenading a day of the week, and… well, we could go on and on. Instead, we’ve posted all that’s fit to embed over the next several pages. Get ready to lay your emotions bare like the girl in this 2008 viral fave, then click through!

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I've never been prouder to hail from the 708 area code than I am today

Sometimes a YouTube video comes along that makes me truly nostalgic for the type of high-quality life-improving services only available in the southwest Chicagoland area.  Jones’ CHEAP ASS Prepaid Legal and Daycare Academy: Because in today’s broke-ass society, things aren’t cheap.

In addition to top-notch molester-free daycare services, the Alsip, Ill.-based sketch comedy troupe Big Dog Eat Child also shills for Jones’ Big Ass Truck Rental & Storage (“Do you know how big a bus is?”) and Jones’ Good Ass Barbeque and Massage.

Richard Simmons Drops the F-Bomb

Just what you need to start your Friday off on a good note: A NSFW Richard Simmons video from the ’80s, with profanity-laden outtakes of his talk show.

The clip’s been on YouTube since 2007 and only 13,000 of you have seen it. What gives? Which part of “NSFW Richard Simmons video” don’t you understand?

iPod inspection: What's on your cardio playlist?

I need your help, PopWatchers. You see, last Wednesday, while downing my umpteenth cup of vacation gelato, I made a vow that when I got back home, I was going to return to working out a minimum of three days a week — no excuses. Trouble is, Mother Nature has decided to celebrate my commitment to exercise by delivering a crushing heat wave to the New York region. In other words, it’s 95 degrees in the shade (and humid!) — and just the mere thought of physical activity is sending me to the emotional mojito bar. Clearly, the only thing that’s going to prevent me from ditching the gym today is a killer cardio playlist, which I started working on during lunch today. Here’s what I’ve got so far…

Amanda Ghost, "Filthy Mind"
The Breeders’ "Cannonball"
The Butchies, "Send Me You"
B-52s, "Private Idaho"
Christina Aguilera, "Fighter"

Okay, so clearly I’ve only made it through ‘C’ in my music library (yes, C+C Music Factory has secretly made the cut… just don’t tell anyone), but it’s clear I need some help if I’m ever going to have abs like Daniel Craig. (Hey! I can dream!) So help a blogger out; channel your inner Richard Simmons (minus the hideous candycane shorts, please) and contribute to the ultimate cardio playlist in the comments section below.

Is this how the cycle of TV addiction begins?

Rich_lI’ve always thought it would be a genius idea to mass-market a TV whose power is generated by an attached exercise bike. Want to know if Kate and Sawyer get off the island? Hit the pedal. Did Beauty and the Geek’s Megan really tackle a sheep wearing nothing but a bikini? Hit the pedal. It’s the perfect solution for getting lazy TV addicts like me out of a permanent state of recline on my couch (short of, you know, actually putting on sneakers and exercising). Fisher-Price clearly thought so as well, as they are launching just such a product to help battle childhood obesity: the Smart Cycle, a mini-stationary bike for 3 to 5 year olds that only lets the rider view the TV screen and play games when in motion.

To promote their shiny new product, the F-P folks decided to go with a child-like spokesmodel: 58-year-old oldies sweat-er Richard Simmons who, while not so new, was certainly quite shiny in his now trademark bejeweled tank and striped short shorts at the announcement at Toy Fair in New York City today. Taking about his own childhood obesity problem — the New Orleans native topped out at 268 pounds when the graduated from high school ("If it was fried, it was my friend") — Simmons (who also has the softest hands of any guy I’ve ever met) eagerly chatted up the product, and mentioned to me that he’s actually in the process of gearing up for his first Congressional hearing to promote a fitness bill he’s been discussing with Congressman Wamp of Tennessee. Richard Simmons in a suit? There better be some rhinestones on that sucker.

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