It’s hard to tell what’s worse in Rachael vs. Guy: Celebrity Cook-off 2014: the food or the general display of humanity. Imagine The Celebrity Apprentice, but with a fire pit. No one can cook. Like, these people can feed their dependents, because they’re wealthy, but the skills are just not there. You are basically watching random divas fail, and flail, and fight, and then over-spice stuff. It’s hilariously awful, much like this choice quote about hosts and team leaders Guy Fieri and Rachael Ray:
“They’re like the Heisman Trophy winners of food,” said actual Heisman Trophy winner Herschel Walker with a straight face.
Let’s rank season 3’s eight celebrity “chefs” from least to most tolerable after tonight’s extremely unappetizing Medieval Times challenge:
8. Jake Pavelka: The former Bachelor star put a ROSE on his stupid barely salad because it needed a little “touch of love.” My dislike for him sprouted anew when he said, all zen-like in Team Rachael’s trailer, “I can do a barley salad. There’s nothing complicated about it.” It was all downhill from there; the guy’s super serious about competing on any and all televised programs. “In competitions, you’ve gotta peak at the right time,” he claimed, with scientific precision. “Not week 1.” Whaaaaat?! In competitions. READ FULL STORY