The problem with modern action movies is not that they are stupider than vintage ’80s action movies, but rather, that they have become so bland, so milquetoast, so flavorless, the entire genre rendered insubstantial by the triple tidal wave of political correctness, the everybody-kinda-likes-vanilla method of winning over the global audience, and the brutal tyranny of the PG-13 rating. For truly, who among us doesn’t yearn for a more colorful time, when action heroes weren’t so emo, when the fate of the world wasn’t always at stake, and when a wild dude like Paul Verhoeven could introduce a three-breasted mutant prostitute into the hallowed history of cinema in the middle of Total Recall. But on that note, don’t despair, friends. Because today is a day for rejoicing: In a video interview with Collider, director Len Wiseman explicitly promises that there will be “a three-breasted woman” in his upcoming Total Recall remake, which will be PG-13. READ FULL STORY »
Tag: Nudity (61-70 of 127)
As a journalist on the periphery of the outskirts of the periphery of the celebrity kingdom, I can tell you that famous people are better and smarter than us common folk. Their stories are better, their teeth are brighter, and their smell… delightful. So when I make the commitment to follow a bold-faced name on Twitter, I expect to be enlightened, entertained, or at least belittled in some way. For the most part, they don’t let me down. But occasionally, I’m left feeling empty.
Take, for example, Hugh Hefner. READ FULL STORY »
Olivia Wilde will have fake CGI nipples in 'The Change-Up.' Oh, for the days before digital nudity...
You can blame digital effects for many strange and terrible things. Thanks to CGI, great Hollywood trades like production design, makeup, and old-school practical visual effects have begun to slowly fade away, with smiling teams of faceless engineers doing the same work for cheaper, Gooback-style. Thanks to CGI, 2-D feature animation has entered a period of eternal decline. Thanks to CGI, every freaking movie and a lot of freaking TV shows are shot in front of greenscreens. Thanks to CGI, Jar Jar Binks exists, and Green Lantern exists, and in the fourth Die Hard movie John McClane fought a freaking fighter jet, because why not?
But if you ask me, the single greatest crime of the Digital Effects Era is more subtle, and yet also more profound. I’m talking about fake movie nudity, which first made headlines last year with Jessica Alba’s shower scene in Machete. READ FULL STORY »
Eddie Cibrian, star of NBC’s new fall drama The Playboy Club, is, one must admit, an excellent model for Charisma, a luxury home brand that includes bedding, robes, bath rugs, and towels. For the fall 2011 campaign, he was photographed in bed, of course, and while those shots are worth looking at (check them out here, along with a behind-the-scenes video in which Cibrian is half-naked but hearing compliments like, “Look at those sheets! Ohmygod!”), it’s the bathtub shots that make me happy. I love when male celebrities agree to be photographed in a bathtub because it always feels so random even if it isn’t. See: Colin Firth and David Boreanaz. Therefore, I’m adding Cibrian’s shoot to my list of Great Pop Culture Moments in Bathtubs, which, my editor Mike Bruno said I could blog “only if you include the ‘When Doves Cry’ video, which starts with doves opening double doors to a purple misty room containing Prince in a tub. As Morris Day would say, ‘So sexy!’” So, we have that. What else should be on this list? Other colleagues have nominated Fatal Attraction, Scarface, The Talented Mr. Ripley, and Pretty Woman. Off the top of my head, my submissions would include:
Playboyfounder and girl-next-door wrangler Hugh Hefner has been openly tweeting his feelings about the end of his relationship with Crystal Harris — the woman he was all set to marry until a couple days ago. Last night, in a move which could either be interpreted as a lovably droll joke or a surprisingly vicious spurned-lover kiss-off, Hefner tweeted: “Recent events call for a special sticker on the July cover. Look for it on newsstands.” Y’see, Crystal is actually on the cover of the July issue of Playboy… with a headline that proclaims, “Introducing Mrs. Crystal Hefner.” Commence awkward collar pulls, America! READ FULL STORY »
The saga of King Arthur and his round furniture-loving knights has been done to death — so it’s no surprise that Starz’s new series, Camelot, changes a few key details in an attempt to inject new life into the story. While some of those tweaks are welcome (hello, Joseph Fiennes as a badass, baldheaded Merlin) others might end up rubbing Arthurites the wrong way. Here are the four main ways Camelot switches things up: READ FULL STORY »
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