What are we to make of Kim Kardashian? She has everything that a human being could conceivably desire. She is cartoonishly beautiful and monstrously wealthy. She eats at only the finest restaurants and wears only the finest clothes. She lives in a big expensive house in Los Angeles, except when she occasionally decides to live in a big expensive suite in Manhattan, and you get the vibe that she has a big expensive place to live in every major city in the world. She recently got paid a huge sum of money to fly to Dubai, where her work consisted of smiling and waving and finding increasingly vapid ways to express her undying love for Dubai. A crack team of makeup elves follows her everywhere, ensuring that she always looks magazine-perfect and robo-pretty. She will never go hungry. She will never go broke. She will never wake up in an uncomfortable bed. Those are not even concerns that she could understand. Our problems are as remote to her as were the problems of the common slave to the Pharaoh. READ FULL STORY »
Tag: Kardash...Okay We'll Stop Typing Now (31-40 of 105)
Last night we were treated to not one, but two all-new episodes of 30 Rock. Hooray! In lieu of your traditional 3o Rock recap, I’ve opted to present you with the top 10 lines from both “People Are Idiots Three” and “The Ballad of Kenneth Parcell.” Try not to be too upset, and just focus on the gems that the 30 Rock writers give us each week. READ FULL STORY »
This was the winter of our disconnect.
Despite the general belief that the Year of the Dragon is supposed to usher in prosperity, such has not proven true for some of our favorite A-listers. In the last month, no fewer than a dozen celebrities have announced that they would be buying one-way tickets on the break-up train straight to Singlesville. What gives? READ FULL STORY »
Nick Cannon called in to The Howard Stern Show this morning as he simulcasted his own radio show. The two entertainers, who are teaming up on the next season of America’s Got Talent, talked about everything from Cannon’s recent health scare to the upcoming season of AGT. Cannon had some harsh words for former Talent judge Piers Morgan, whom Stern is replacing, and some TMI about his sexual experience with wife Mariah Carey, Lindsay Lohan, and Kim Kardashian. READ FULL STORY »
In an essay for this week’s Sports Illustrated, writer Jack McCallum discusses the outpouring of vitriol for Kris Humphries — who was recently named the NBA’s most disliked player — in the wake of his 72-day marriage to Kim Kardashian. McCallum asserts that fans, who’ve taken to heckling Humphries with cardboard cutouts of his ex during his games, are choosing Kardashian over the Nets forward and urges his readers, “to plant your flag on the correct side in this culture war, which is not the Kardashian side.” With all due respect to McCallum, I’m not so sure basketball fans are taking sides at all in this sideshow. READ FULL STORY »
Kris Humphries began last night’s episode of Kopeland and Kukaracha Go Boating by ordering a Gray Goose Gimlet and announcing to his loving soon-to-be-ex-wife that he’d been offered a significant cash sum to “Make an appearance in Toronto.” Kim-Kim vetoed the idea. She had big plans for the weekend. Or maybe it was the middle of the week. Maybe, when the Kardashian women were little girls, their mother gave them specialized calendars, where Saturday followed Tuesday, and Christmas came twice a year. and there was an eighth day of the week called Krisday, and Wednesday was spelled “Wennsday.” Kim and Kourtney wanted to flee the hustle and bustle of New York City for the freakish quiet of Mystic, Conn. READ FULL STORY »
The Sense About Science (SAS) campaign has named Jersey Shore doctor of grain liquor Snooki and Republican presidential candidate Michele Bachmann as two of 2011′s worst offenders of Bad Science. Bachmann went on TV to tell a story of a Tampa woman who claimed her daughter had become “mentally retarded” from an HPV vaccine, and Snooki — well, Snooki’s sort of a science experiment gone wrong in so many (and some delightful) ways that I’d like to give her scientific claim its own paragraph. Let it breathe a little, like seamen amidst a gust of sea air.
“I don’t really like the beach. I hate sharks, and the water’s all whale sperm. That’s why the ocean’s salty.”
The untethered inclusion of “I hate sharks” in there is almost poetic. Think about it for a few seconds. NO, I’m just kidding, don’t hurt yourselves. READ FULL STORY »
It appears that self-promotion is nothing new for our favorite Kardashian matriarch, Kris Jenner, as a video has surfaced that shows her cruising around L.A. in the 80s, singing about her friends for her 30th birthday to the tune of Randy Newman’s I Love LA. The video was posted to YouTube in August, but is gaining some traction in a slow news week. Check out the video after the jump and add some vintage Kardashian (and even O.J. Simpson!) to your holiday.
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Workers’ rights organization China Labor Watch has just published a damning investigative report into a pair of factories in China, where working conditions apparently resembled an Upton Sinclair/Triangle Shirtwaist nightmare vision of proletariat misery. The report alleges that clothing designer Bebe had products manufactured in the sweatshops… including a line of clothing, handbags, and jewelry that were part of the “K-Dash by Kardashian” brand. If these allegations are true, then the Kardashians would enter the rarified class of businesspeople who have happily availed themselves of the curiously unsympathetic labor ethics endemic to our beloved People’s Republic. (To be fair, I also just described Steve Jobs, Michael Jordan, and every single major entrepreneur of the modern age, besides maybe the toolbox who runs American Apparel. This is a horrible world.) READ FULL STORY »
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