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'Parks and Rec': 8 great Ron Swanson-isms from 'Ron & Diane'

Last night’s episode of Parks & Recreation took us deeper into Chris’ ongoing psychological collapse and introduced us to Gayle Gergich (Christie Brinkley), Jerry’s incomprehensibly beautiful but slightly robotic wife. It also brought back Tammy II, Ron’s deranged, nymphomaniac ex-wife (or “sex-wife,” as she calls it) and pitted her against Leslie in what is probably the greatest dumpster fight ever depicted on screen.

But the heart of the episode took place at the Indiana Fine Woodworking Association Woodworking Awards, a surly event that Ron referred to as “heaven.” Given that he was surrounded not only by hand-made wood crafts but also by three of the most important women in his life — Leslie, Tammy, and new flame Diane — Ron had ample opportunity to dish out his singular wisdom. So grab your belt sanders and strap on your safety goggles folks, because it’s time for the eight best Ron Swanson-isms from “Ron & Diane.”

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