According to The Hollywood Reporter, The Office‘s Steve Carell is attached to The Beaver, "a script fromfirst-time writer Kyle Killen about a man who walks around with abeaver puppet on his hand, treating it as something close to ahuman creature with human feelings." The film is currently shopping for a director, and we’d like to suggest South Park‘s Trey Parker for three reasons: (1) Reading the movie’s synopsis made us think of Mr. Hat, Mr. Garrison’s hand puppet (pictured). (2) After Team America: World Police, we’re confident Parker could make us feel for felt. (3) We think he would enjoy having "The Beaver" on his résumé.
Is Parker your pick?
addCredit(“Carrell: Nancy Ostertag/Getty Images; Garrison: Co”)
Oh, do you, Elle editor-in-chief Anne Slowey? Should they be chillier than your heart but not as frosted as your hair? Excellent. Last night’s series premiere of The CW’s Stylista introduced us to an already-trying-too-hard-just-by-showing-up crew of young wannabe journalists whose "lifelong dream" is to become a Junior Editor. Um, some free advice: THAT IS THE WORST LIFELONG DREAM I’VE EVER HEARD. The underlings spent most of the hour fetching breakfast for Slowey (pictured), shopping at H&M so that she wouldn’t find them as heinous as she did when they wore their own, non-TV-sponsored clothes, and lolling around the fake Elle office/blatant TV set mocking each other’s appearances moments after barely being introduced. We’ve got some real winners here, like Megan, who was "given a chunk of money" to open her own boutique at 22, and Kate, who spent most of the episode in tears because no one wanted to look at her giant boobs. No, literally that’s all that happened until Sideshow Bob got eliminated for wearing a big-ass scarf but otherwise looking "boring." 
For the average Halloween lover, October 31 is the perfect opportunity to channel an inner witch, vampire, or 
Watching the premiere of My Own Worst Enemy — NBC’s Christian-Slater-has-a-split-personality drama — I finally understood how audience testing could screw a pilot: If I were holding a dial that measured how much I liked each moment of the hour, the results would look hillier than San Francisco. (
Finally, a political campaign that really speaks to me! NOT. The new Dancing With the Stars recruit’s inability to muster up excitement even within her lowly shopping entourage suggests that Kim Kardashian should have considered adding the ultimatum "OR DIE" to her latest line of tees. Just sayin’. And no, I won’t be voting. I’m a journalist! I must remain objective. That’s why I decided to begin my ongoing MISTY & MAKS 4-EVAH AND EVAH, AMEN collage behind my desk. Duh. 
Last night’s season premiere of Gossip Girl (read Tim Stack’s recap 
I can’t be the only comedy 
