That’s right: In the pages of GQ‘s brand new Men of the Year issue, Justin Timberlake — smooth-singing, Tom Ford-rocking, Elvis’s-granddaughter-maker-outer Justin Timberlake — claims he isn’t cool. Which sort of makes us want to curl into the fetal position and sob; after all, if this guy isn’t cool, what hope could there possibly be for the rest of us?
Wait, strike that — see, Timberlake is using the whole “cool” thing as a means to explain his general philosophy, which falls somewhere on the #YOLO spectrum. “Being cool,” he clarifies to the magazine, “is about keeping your blood pressure steady. So no. Don’t be cool. Be passionate. Be dedicated. Be tenacious. Be uncompromising. Be pissed. Be happy. Be sad.” And here is where the strings begin to swell.
“I’ve made a career out of doing things that I should not be doing,” Timberlake continues. “I wasn’t cool about it. Because being cool would have meant I passed up on those opportunities. If you do that, it’s because you’re afraid. And what are you afraid of? You know?”
The vocals cut out. There’s a brief moment of silence. Then — crashing cymbals! Gospel choir! Key change!