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'The Bachelor' premiere: 'It was literally, like, an animal attack on the eyeballs'

Well, maybe not literally. Not even figuratively, really. Perhaps you’ll disagree, rose lovers, but I’d say that the premiere of The Bachelor: If These Abs Could Talk was a relatively catfight-free affair. And that’s okay by me. Sure, some of the “ladies” were upset by the “surprise” return of a previous contestant, while others got their panties in a bunch about Sean’s unorthodox method for handing out the roses, but — and I may live to eat these words — it seems like maybe possibly there just might be some women of the non-heinous variety vying for Sean’s heart this season. (Not that woman who’s obsessed with 50 Shades of Grey, of course. She’s just straight-up sad.) Stay tuned for my full recap later tonight (UPDATE: Click to see Kristen’s full Bachelor season premiere recap and Chris Harrison’s Bachelor blog), but in the meantime, don’t be shy — tell me what you thought about night one of Sean’s “journey.” How’d you feel about that weird Arie segment? Does Sean have some kind of preternatural attraction to women named Ashley? Did your head explode when you saw that there was not one, but FOUR African-American contestants this time around? Post your thoughts now!

'The Bachelorette' wedding: Ashley and JP get their lavish, all-expenses-paid fairy tale ending

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Listen up, rose lovers: The Bachelor is sick of your s–t, okay? Yes, they know that only 12.5 percent of their 24 “winning” “couples” have ended up at the altar, and that most break up 20 minutes as soon as the After the Final Rose credits roll… but “this show is and always will be dedicated to helping people find meaningful, life long relationships,” says Chris Harrison, and lots of random fameosexuals have gotten married thanks to Mike Fleiss’ evil empire: Holly and Blake! Deanna and Stephen Stagliano! John Presser and Tara Durr! (Wait, who?) Anyhow, enough is enough, haters — if you don’t stop talking smack about this franchise, Team Bachelor is going to cut a bitch.

And with that fit of defensive self-justification taken care of, welcome to Ashley and JP’s wedding! Or, that is, the 107 minutes of filler before the actual “I dos.” After a brief recap of the duo’s whirlwind Bachelorette “journey,” we rejoin the couple in the present day, living their “everyday life” — which involves renting those overpriced rowboats in Central Park, eating ice cream in downtown Princeton, NJ, and spending an inordinate amount of time discussing Ashley’s tiny dog Boo. (Side note: They are also prepared — nay, excited! — to host a Bachelorette viewing party for their future children, should those tykes ever wonder how mommy and daddy met. Guys, if you do, you might want to fast forward through this part.)

Ashley and JP have been so busy living their “fairy tale,” though, that they haven’t even had time to set a date for the wedding. It’s been so long that at this point, their family members — who’ve all gathered at a local bar to hear some exciting news from the couple — are starting to think that Ash & Jape are going to skip the whole marriage thing and go straight to makin’ babies. As Ashley begins her preamble — “We do have some really, really special news, and we wanted to share it with you guys first” — someone begins chanting, “Pregnant! Pregnant! Pregnant!” Nope, ABC has scheduled that special for next December – first everybody’s got to head out West to watch the duo get hitched for the cameras. Even Ashley’s sister Chrystie, who straight up hated JP when she met him for the first time, is happy to hear the news — or, at least, she’s agreed to tell America how “wrong,” “wrong,” “wrong” she was about her sister’s beau in exchange for an all-expenses-paid trip to the Langham Huntington Hotel in beautiful Pasadena, California.

Speaking of, the Langham’s worker bees are busy carpeting every available surface of the hotel’s horseshoe garden with white roses and hydrangeas. It’s all part of Ashley’s “simple,” “feminine,” “neutral” style she described to her wedding planner a few months back — a meeting that was, conveniently, also caught on film. In it, Jape manages to appear engaged for about three minutes, but once the discussion turns to wood tables and DJ vs. band and party favors and the dinner menu and gifts for the wedding party, he looks ready to open a vein. Fortunately we don’t have to watch the duo pore over fabric samples and centerpieces, because by the end of the next commercial break, super hero wedding planner Mindy Weiss has filled a ballroom with sample tables and even chosen a selection of gowns for Ashley’s pooch. One of which, I should add, is a $7,500 ensemble constructed out of antique lace. Screw you, 99 percent!

NEXT: Say yes to the dress!

Did Chris Harrison just reveal the next Bachelor?

Even in heat that caused people to pass out on the Emmy red carpet, we don’t think Chris Harrison would be light-headed enough to break Bachelor casting news there. But SheKnows.com believes he did just that and confirmed rumors that Sean Lowe, the sensitive Texan Bachelorette Emily Maynard didn’t chose, has been picked. Watch the interview here. At around 1:20, Harrison is asked who he’d like to see as the next Bachelor and the interviewer suggests Sean before he gets to answer. “Well, a little known secret, he has been chosen. We are close to production. I don’t know if I can tell you,” Harrison says, “but let’s just say I think Sean would be a great guy. I really do. I think he’d be really good.”

It sounds to us like Harrison meant “he” as in the Bachelor — not Sean — has been chosen. A rep for ABC tells EW, “We are not confirming anyone right now. We haven’t started production yet.” Still, Harrison’s “let’s just say I think Sean would be a great guy” does sound like a solid hint. Then again, it could be a clever misdirect. READ FULL STORY

Chris Harrison blogs the 'Bachelor Pad' season finale

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There is so much we need to discuss that took place on the finale of Bachelor Pad 3 but let’s be honest the only thing that anybody on the planet will be discussing is Nick deciding to keep the money all for himself leaving Rachel heartbroken and just plain broke. I can’t wait to hear from all of you and get your feelings on this situation. While I don’t necessarily want to just throw out my own opinion I do have a unique perspective of this situation and there are some things I think you should know that might change your perspective.

But first I want to say that no matter what you think of Nick’s decision, you have to feel bad for Rachel. Whether she was used by Michael or not, I think we could all see she was falling in love with a guy that was just never going to have those same feelings for her. She was left heartbroken. She did a very good job of expressing her feelings for Michael and did the best she could to try and get some sort of answer. But let’s face it, we’ve all been in that situation, and there is never an explanation that will make anybody feel better about it.

The only thing that made any of that okay was the fact that Rachel knew she would at least walk away from this $125,000 richer. Unfortunately for Rachel, Nick had other plans for that money — which is to say, he really wanted it for himself. Let’s put Rachel’s feelings aside and the fact that Nick didn’t handle the situation well after he won the money, and let’s lay out a few facts:  READ FULL STORY

Chris Harrison blogs 'Bachelor Pad' episode 7

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The final episode in the house was the biggest one yet. Next week’s episode will be the finale which takes place in front of a live studio audience and I’ll talk a little bit about that later.

This week was different as we held two competitions. The first competition was a huge project. We blacked out the windows in the back of the house so the contestants couldn’t see what was going on but due to all the noise they knew something big was happening back there. Our crews worked non-stop day and night to quickly build that contraption over the pool.

This challenge was completely based on who knew the most Bachelor and Bachelor Pad related trivia. Last week we saw Chris and Sarah dominate the Spelling Bee and this week they did it again. In all fairness, it was Sarah that dominated this competition by herself. All Chris had to do was sit there and enjoy the view as each competitor fell into the pool one by one. This challenge wasn’t even close, and Sarah could’ve gone on answering questions all day. She got several questions that I didn’t even know the answers to.

READ FULL STORY

Chris Harrison blogs 'Bachelor Pad' episode 6

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It was really interesting to read the reactions to last week’s elimination. Many of you respected what Erica did, and many of you were in Michael’s camp. One of the things I love about this show is the different emotions and opinions it brings out in our fans. One thing is for sure, and that is Rachel is not happy that Michael is gone, especially now as the contestants are partnered up all the way to the very end. The good news for Rachel is that her new partner Nick (I had no idea he was on this season, but apparently he has been living in the house for weeks) is a good business partner that now wants to do the same thing she does: Survive. And in an exciting twist, we not only got to see Nick, but he said these three inspirational words: “Let’s do this.” READ FULL STORY

Chris Harrison blogs 'Bachelor Pad' episode 5

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Once again this episode starts with the fallout from the last elimination. As you can see, the anger management classes aren’t exactly working for Chris. He’s an angry little elf, isn’t he?  Michael had a great line when he said Chris was taking up “all the a-hole space” in the house. You know things are getting out of hand when even Michael Stagliano thinks you’re being a dill-weed.

This week’s challenge, “The Great Fall of China,” really did seem simple when I was explaining it, but as you saw, it was pretty difficult to execute. I can’t begin to tell you how much fun we had coming up with the names of the challenges this season. To think there could be that many seemingly “intelligent” adults having a conversation about “Hot Sludge Funday” or “The Great Fall of China” is outstanding. But that’s why we get the big bucks — we’re making important decisions that will change the world for the better! READ FULL STORY

Chris Harrison blogs 'Bachelor Pad' episode 4

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The Olympic flame might have gone out in London, but on Bachelor Pad, the wildfires are just starting to burn. With Reid gone, there was a huge shift of power in the house and the people left in the wake had to come together to try and get rid of the now-forming power couples. Our competition this week, the Game Show Mash-Up, was really a no-holds-barred, tell it like it is kind of competition, and let me tell you, it wasn’t long before the claws came out.

The women started off and the rivalry between Jaclyn, Ed’s partner, and Sarah, his recently forsaken lover, goes on. Sarah can’t quite see the connection between Jaclyn and Ed, but I think it’s pretty clear that something is going on. More on that later. In the meantime, the real drama began when Jamie called out Jaclyn for being fake. Jaclyn may be the funny one in the house, but when someone gets under her skin, the jokes stop and her anger really comes out. From that moment on, Jaclyn was gunning for Jamie and no amount of explaining from Jamie was going to change that. READ FULL STORY

Chris Harrison blogs 'Bachelor Pad' episode 3

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Before I get into the mess that was this week’s Bachelor Pad, I want to take a moment to talk about a beautiful thing that happened to our family this week. Saturday I was honored to officiate the wedding of two of our wonderful producers, Cassie and Pete. I have watched these two grow professionally and romantically over the years, and it has been a wonderful thing to witness. This love culminated in an amazing ceremony this weekend surrounded by family and friends. It was fantastic to see and hang with so many of our happy couples at the wedding, including Ben and Courtney, Emily and Jef, and Ashley and JP. There was a lot of love in the house, and I can’t wait for the next wedding to come. I hope they are on their honeymoon and not reading this but I just want to say congratulations to Cassie and Pete — your Bachelor family loves you both very much.

This week’s Bachelor Pad was interesting to say the least. READ FULL STORY

Chris Harrison blogs 'Bachelor Pad': Ta-ta twins

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We’re only two weeks in and already things are getting out of hand on Bachelor Pad. The great thing about this season is how much things have changed and will continue to change with every coming week. As soon as Paige and SWAT said their goodbyes, I expected everyone to just go to bed and get rested for the next competition — but not this group. The twins, Erica and Brittany, had been after each other all week, and no one really knew why. It was pretty clear that if these two girls didn’t calm down, they were on a path to self-destruction. More on that later.

With the Summer Olympics in London upon us, we could think of no better way to get into the spirit than with rhythmic gymnastics. When everyone came running out to the front of the mansion, their jaws dropped. The gymnasts were amazing, and our contestants knew they were going to really have to work hard to get even close to this level of performance. Once the group split off into guys and girls, it became pretty clear who the frontrunners were and who was going to struggle not to fall on their faces. READ FULL STORY

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