For people who do not love football — or only care about football when their team or teams are playing, and their team or teams didn’t even make the playoffs this year — the only reason to watch the Super Bowl is to watch the ads. We’ve shushed our friends and loved ones as the Super Bowl logo has swooshed across the screen ushering in a new ad break. We’ve laughed, cried, and jeered as each 30-to-60 second spot played, instantly debating its humor and effectiveness: “I loved the part when Betty White got tackled!” “Ed McMahon shilling for gold-related websites makes me sad.” “Wazzzzuuuuuuuuup!” We’ve talked far more about animated polar bears and honorable Clydesdales and adorable mini-Darth Vaders the next day than practically any touchdown pass or option play. This is all such an integral part of what it means to be an American — nay, to be a citizen of this planet we call Earth — that I think it was retroactively written into the Constitution, Magna Carta, and Plato’s Republic.
Of course, I have been spending the last week or so quivering with outrage, so I could be exaggerating just a twinge. Because, as of this writing, at least 38 Super Bowl ads have already been released on the Internet, either as they’ll air tonight, as a quick snippet teaser, or in an extended form. And. That. Is. Just. WRONG. READ FULL STORY