I now present to you a special countdown: The Top 20 reasons why I was so sad this past weekend. Ready? Okay, here goes.... Reason 20: I ate a Twinkie for the first time in 15 years, and it wasn't nearly as good as I remembered. Reason 19: Actually, scratch that. There's no reason to share the rest of the countdown, since reasons 19-1 are: Because Casey Kasem officially said goodbye to his American Top 20. (The radio icon had been hosting an abridged version of American Top 40 after he left the original program in 2004.)
I know. Tragic, right? Especially since the 77-year-old radio host left his classic program with barely any fanfare. So why is he leaving? Though I immediately blamed those meddlesome kids -- after all, the man famously voiced Scooby-Doo's Shaggy -- it appears as though the host is leaving to pursue other projects, like a memoir. Impressive, considering most men his age retire to the golf course, or to the couch to watch re-runs of Matlock. But not Casey. And would we expect any less? The workaholic lent his voice to American Top 20's program for 39 freakin' years! And I was lucky enough to have been listening for at least 14, when the host schooled me on the backgrounds of the likes of Shawn Colvin, Everclear, and the Backstreet Boys.
So thank you, Casey Kasem, for your hard work all these years! And I bid you a very appreciative, albeit sad, adieu. I will eat a Scooby snack in your honor.
Let's give him his due, PopWatchers! What's your favorite Casey Kasem memory?
I doubt any of you are too hard-up for another ultra-catty summer reality TV series, but I'd like to announce that I have a new favorite. It's called Obama's Press Conferences. It's airing all the time, y'all. Sometimes there are even repeats! Jump to 2:11 in the video below for the good stuff. This is way better than Teresa flipping over a table. Hey, press, ask him about his smoking some more. Do it. Do it!
Thanks to The Daily Show for selecting choice clips from this hot new summer series -- and to Jon Stewart for amending the Z Snap to include an impressive four prongs.
Better watch your back, Kayla's adorable grandpa (who is clearly Cat Deeley's, the judges', the producers', and my own favorite person of the season so far). Mr. Desai says "It's a no"!
Aggggh! All I can think about when Betty White fondles Sandra Bullock's chest at the end of the trailer for The Proposal is the moment in Sixteen Candles at which Molly Ringwald gets felt up by her own grandma. This scene completely scarred me as a child. Thanks, John Hughes.
Hard to decide which elderly breast-related outburst is worse: Grandma Annie (White)'s "It's like an Easter Egg hunt...There they are!" or Grandma Helen's "Oh, Frank, look. She's got her boobies." Due to the grandfather factor and Samantha Baker's hangup about having a flat chest anyway, not to mention the giant bow, Sixteen Candles is still more cringe-worthy. At least for me. For you? Dawg?
The Internet is flipping out today about the dangers of Rapid Lash, the renewal serum designed to make it seem like you have eyelashes and eyebrows. It works! But the serum, which includes a prostaglandin analogue called isopropyl cloprostenate, can irritate the eyes. And your eyes might change colors. Oh, and you could lose your vision entirely. We thought you should know, because lush lashes are harder to enjoy when you can't see them. But just as important, from an entertainment perspective, is how much better the Rapid Lash commercial becomes if you imagine that the perky host is Strangers With Candy's Jerri Blank (Amy Sedaris). Press play below.
Good news, unmarried women in your late 30s -- one of you is about to hit the jackpot! Excuse me, "jackpot." Fox has picked up the pilot for a reality series called I Married a Stranger, in which "friends" and "families" of a "lonely" lady will eliminate potential suitors for her one by one. What? These people can't possibly be her real friends or real family. Who says "Uh oh, Jane's in her late 30s and unmarried -- we'd better put her on a terrible reality show! How dare she not find love? How dare she." God forbid women of a certain age end up in cozy Slankets with some bitchin' munchies, having a total blast by themselves on their couches. Ugh, the nerve! This calls for a quick poll:
According to Daily Finance, News Corp.'s new chief digital officer Jonathan Miller envisions a future in which at least some of the TV and movies at Hulu will be available only to subscribers. Say what?! He said this: "I don't see why over time that shouldn't happen." For PopWatch's official two-second reaction to this, press play below.
I like Hulu precisely because it's free, though I can see how some people might at some point agree to a minimal monthly or one-time subscription fee, provided it got rid of the annoying ads. (I do not want to attend the University of Phoenix and you can't make me!) But if Hulu really did start to charge, EW.com would presumably have to stop embedding Hulu's content in our blogs. Is that what you want, Hulu? Is it? Actually, it's probably what our international readers want. We know some of you can't view Hulu on PopWatch, so we try to embed from the networks or YouTube whenever we can. So if you're Canadian, just ignore that useless rectangle above. It's nothing.
Is Hulu's freeness its main appeal, P-Dubs? If you suddenly had to pay for it, would you be more likely to find/download what you want somewhere else?
The Axis of Evil announced a Girls Just Want to Have Fun remake this morning. Excuse me?!?! No. This remake can go to hell. And I wouldn't watch it there, either. So wrong. So awful. Miley Cyrus will probably be in this. Oh god. I can't handle it. I'm freaking out. What if we don't make it to the DTV auditions?! I didn't bring a gym bag!!! But seriously. There are SO MANY essential 1985-y elements of this movie that can and should never translate to present day. A sampling....
'GIRLS JUST WANT TO HAVE FUN' DETAILS OF WHICH EVEN THE SLIGHTEST ALTERATION WOULD BE SACRILEGE --"Dancing in Heaven (Orbital Be-Bop)" presented as the hippest jam in all the land (press play below)
--Helen Hunt's grasshopper hat...and her bouffant 'do as she's wheeled out on a horse-drawn carriage as Our New Miss Dance TV --Sarah Jessica Parker's collection of ridiculously high-cut long-sleeved leotards --Natalie Sands' perm --Natalie Sands in general --Convenient availability of incredibly beefy gym-rat *FEMALE
BODYBUILDERS* with tons of free time to lift automobiles with one arm
in an effort to help spread the word about the plan to "Wake Up The Neighborhood" at
Natalie Sands' coming-out party. (And everyone else in the invitations scene.) --Male lead who looks so much like Blossom-era Joey Lawrence that when you watched the film during the early '90s, you honestly just assumed it was him. (It was Lee Montgomery.) --The ridiculous notion that a TV show of just the same couples dancing over and over would actually work. As. If. --"Velcro. Next to the Walkman and Tab, it's the coolest invention of the 20th Century." (Thanks Robyn!)
What an incomplete list! But I guess I'm finished. At least now I know which DVD I'll be watching next time I'm not sober. And now I know how the normals feel whenever their beloved classic '80s movies start getting the remake rumors -- pretty much once a day at this point. I don't know, dawg. For me for you...this one has finally crossed the line.
DreamWorks Animation just announced a huge slate of upcoming projects, and true to company form, it's littered with sequels. Among them, I'd have to say the Kung Fu Panda follow-up sounds the best. First, it has a truly awesome subtitle: The Kaboom of Doom. Second, the original was the first DreamWorks film in ages to truly feel fresh. Not only was it visually stunning, but it had rousing action scenes, a heartwarming and only slightly saccharine message and, best of all, a truly memorable character: Po, the pudgy Panda perfectly matched with the voice of Jack Black. And oh yeah, it was actually pretty darn funny. Sample quote: "It is said that his enemies would go blind from over-exposure to pure awesomeness!" So, bring it on, DreamWorks.
I also don't mind a third Madagascar (the first two are light and breezy and completely harmless), but a fourth Shrek? And a Puss in Boots spinoff, to boot? (Zing?) The green ogre has overstayed his welcome -- by far. What was once lively and original has become a pale mockery of itself. I honestly could not tell you the plot of the third Shrek, minus some vague recollections of a punkish prat character voiced by Justin Timberlake.
Lest you say the company keeps repeating itself, DreamWorks did announce some new projects as well, the most promising of which is called Guardians and involves Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy banding together to save the world. Think of it as The Incredibles, only with Holiday mascots. It sounds fun.
So, PopWatchers, which sequel are you most excited about? What franchise does DreamWorks need to put the kibosh on? And with Pixar's gloriously-reviewedUp opening tomorrow, all of these projects sound totally uninspired in comparison, no?
American Idol second runner-up Danny Gokey has expressed interest in competing on Dancing With the Stars. Way to focus on that music career, sweet songbird. Scream on.
I'd like this to not happen, mostly because I was somehow able to avoid peer pressure from Idolatry's anti-Gokey brigade and have somehow managed to remain relatively unbothered by Danny Gokey. I gather that he's a total doofus, but come on -- he was an American Idol contestant. I don't expect American Idol contestants to be cool. Blasphemy, I know, but I've found the only way I can digest the show is if my standards are super low. They make my midseason breakthrough revelations -- "Wait a minute...Adam Lambert seems smart!" -- much more satisfying.
But back to Gokey. I'm not sure I'm ready for another season's worth of Gokey on the television, especially since (as EW's DWTS TV Watcher) my fast-forward button would be off-limits. Welcome to Gokey in Real Time, Annie! Gokey getting a spray tan. Gokey mouthing the words to his Viennese Waltz accompaniment. Gokey wedging a meaty palm in Cheryl Burke's crotch for a probably illegal lift. I'm sure I'd begin to dislike him in episode 1! I suppose it would be about time.
P-Dubs, what do you think? Should there be a one-reality-show limit for all attention-mongering humans? Would you watch Gokey on DWTS because you love him? Because you hate him? For the sheer spectacle of it all? Would you rather see Scott MacIntyre, who told Slezak he'd want to do DWTS, try it out? Or will you never watch that ridiculous show ever in your life regardless of who's on it, because YOU'VE GOT STANDARDS, DAMMIT?
DreamWorks Animation just 
American Idol second runner-up Danny Gokey has expressed interest in competing on Dancing With the Stars. Way to focus on that music career, sweet songbird. Scream on.
