Self-obsessed jocks. Over-aggressive jerks. Ditzes with clown boobs. Token "old fogies" who are usually only in their forties. These are the archetypes that always make up a Big Brother cast. We love, loathe, and laugh at them in equal measure, watching them obsessively all summer while feeling the constant need to scrub our eyes out with industrial strength soap. As season 11 kicks off this evening, Jessica Shaw and I take a look at some of our pre-season favorites on Must List Live! Which tools and tramps will we be rooting for this summer? Watch the video below to see for yourself. And let us know which sleazeballs you're pulling for in the Big Brother house as we all prepare to hand our nice peaceful summers over to Julie Chen.
What do you get when you bring together a bikini model, a neuroscientist, a tattooed special-effects makeup artist, and a tae kwon do champ? Another wacky season of Big Brother, that’s what! For the 11th edition, beginning July 9, the houseguests will be broken up into high school cliques: “popular,” “athletes,” and “brains.” The first two categories will showcase BB’s usual parade of hot bods (see the aforementioned bikini model from Atlanta), while “brains” seems to be a euphemism for the requisite “old” married dude (Casey, a fifth-grade teacher from Florida, is a relatively decrepit—gasp!—41). And as long as you’re expecting the unexpected, a surprise is in store for opening night, when host Julie Chen will introduce a 13th houseguest who we’ll apparently recognize (now that's ominous).
Here are the deets on the 12 houseguests, followed by a helpful introductory video:
Braden Bacha, 28, Santa Monica, CA, a single surfer Chima Simone, 32, West Hollywood, CA, a single freelance journalist Jordan Lloyd, 22, Matthews, NC, a single waitress Laura Crosby, 21, Atlanta, GA, a single bikini model Michele Noonan, 27, Pasadena, CA, a married neuroscientist Casey Turner, 41, Lakeland, FL, a married fifth-grade teacher Jeff Schroeder, 30, Norridge, IL, a single advertising salesman Kevin Campbell, 29, Chula Vista, CA, a single graphic designer Lydia Tavera, 24, Torrance, CA, a single special effects make-up artist Natalie Martinez, 24, Gilbert, AZ, a single Tae Kwon Do champion Ronnie Talbott, 30, Belpre, Ohio, a married gamer Russell Kairouz, 24, Walnut, CA, a single mixed martial arts fighter
Okay, I'm done talking about Coach. For now anyway, let's turn our
attention to Stephen and one of my favorite quotes of this episode:
Ext. Camp – Day
Stephen scratches the back of Taj.
Stephen: "I've never brought such pleasure to a woman before."
Did this comment catch anyone's ear? I have a few explanations for this comment:
a. Stephen is gay, not that there's anything wrong with that
b. Stephen is straight but has limited experience with women
c. Stephen is going for broke and playing this game full on
I vote for C. I think Stephen is one of the most sophisticated and
subtle players in the game. He is letting people believe that he's the
quiet, "one beat behind" city kid just happy to not have bugs crawling
up his arse. Who knows, he may be gay and/or he may have limited
experience with women, but that is irrelevant. This guy could go deep.
EW talked to Dan Gheesling, the 25-year-old Catholic school teacher from Michigan and quite possibly the nicest winner in Big Brother history, about his landslide victory, his thoughts about Jerry and what his girlfriend Monica asked him once the show was over.(Catch Josh Wolk's Big Brother finale recap here.)
What did you think of the unanimous vote in your favor? Who did you think was the least likely to vote for you on the jury?
Man I was hoping to get four votes … maybe. But 7-0, wow, what a phenomenal feeling. I thought Keesha and Renny were solid but the others were up in the air. I thought Jerry and Libra would vote for Memphis and April, Ollie and Michelle would decide the game. I think this is a first in Big Brother history. (Editor’s note: He’s right. It is. Even the Big Brother master, Dr. Will, had two votes against him in season 2.)
We saw your girlfriend Monica hug you at the end. Did she think you acted like a good boy? Monica was pretty supportive but I had some questions to answer. One had to do with my sharing a place to sleep with Keesha. I assured Monica that I built a wall of pillows between us and put a picture of Monica on top of the pillow wall. I told Monica it was for game play. Any girl would hate to see her boyfriend in bed with a girl as beautiful and charming and nice as Keesha, but we were just friends.
There was speculation in the house that you were America’s player. Did that last for long? I had to fight that off every second thanks to one woman: Libra. She started the America’s Player conspiracy. It went on constantly. I always had to battle it. (Editor’s note: Dan was America’s player for one week, and won $20,000 for it.)
EW.com talked to Jerry MacDonald, the 75-year-old great-grandpa from Texas, about feeling lonely in the house, fighting with Dan, and how he didn’t really touch April’s boobs in the beginning of the season. (When you're done reading, click here for Josh Wolk's hilarious recap of last night's episode.)
ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY: How many seasons of Big Brother have you watched? More importantly, why watch Big Brother than say, C-SPAN or The History Channel? JERRY MACDONALD: I’ve seen every season. I like the challenge of Big Brother, the excitement of it. I like to see people go at it, people who use their brains and their hearts to play the game.
How much were you sure that Dan would take you to the final 2? Were you 50 percent sure? 100 percent sure? None, because of his relationship with Memphis. I knew I was out because Memphis returned two shirts I had given him that my daughter had sent to me. They were a little big so to test the waters, I gave them to Memphis. He wouldn’t try them on. Just before the vote, he brought them back to me and told me to give them to my son-in-law. That was a signal that he and Dan had made a deal.
Maybe he just didn’t like the shirts. They were nice, expensive shirts. They were brand new.
Let’s be honest, though -- for a good while in the house, you didn’t seem to like Dan at all and yelled at him constantly. I don’t think he was friendly. He played a pretty nasty game over all, not just with me, but with other people. He’s not too well liked among the jury.
After the jump, Jerry talks about calling Dan "Judas," wearing his military hat, and touching April's boobs...
Keesha Smith, Big Brother 10's 29-year-old Hooters waitress from Burbank, Calif., talks to EW.com about her disdain for Memphis, that floater Jerry, and the message she received from Dan on the way out of the house.
ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY: So how are you feeling about Memphis this morning? KEESHA SMITH: I’m not liking Memphis too much this morning.
In the episode, we really didn’t see Memphis explain why he was going to evict you. Did he say something to you that we didn’t see at home? He never gave me any kind of explanation. He got up out of the chair and avoided me the rest of the time. I confronted him but he got up and he walked out of the room. He came to the sauna room and expected me to hug him!
Do you think there is anything you could have done differently? I guess the only thing I could have done was maybe not be so friendly with Dan. That had a lot to do with it. If it came down to Memphis and Dan, I would have picked Dan in the end instead of him, and he saw my relationship with Dan getting stronger. That scared him.
Do you think Memphis was working with anyone in the house? Do you think he’s in an alliance with Jerry or Dan? I’m not sure. There is so much going through my mind. There has to be something with Jerry in order for him to save Jerry. He couldn’t stand Jerry! I’m trying to put myself in his shoes. Jerry is more of a safe bet. He can beat Jerry in the competitions.
EW.com spoke to Big Brother 10 evictee Renny Martyn, the 53-year-old beauty salon owner from New Orleans, about everything from her classy exit to her eccentric wardrobe (but sadly, we couldn’t talk to her about Gustav, because for some screwy reason CBS thinks she doesn’t need to know about another hurricane back home).
ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY: I am crestfallen that you’re out of the house.
RENNY MARTYN: Not as much as I am.
You were priceless on your way out. You’re the only houseguest so far to take the time to shake everybody’s hand.
They looked like a bunch of Christmas trees all lit up when I saw them. It was amazing. I never experienced anything like that.
Why the hell did Jerry say you did “wonders for the food” in that exit video?
Jerry is a horse’s ass. Come on. He is! Jerry and I never really got along. He’s so boring. Honey, the only thing an old man can do for me is to bring a message from a younger man. He wasn’t my kind of person.
How did he treat the women in the house?
At first, he thought he struck gold with the young women who were sitting on his lap, but they were just using him because he was HOH. He was getting a little frisky but it didn’t last long. To me he was a dirty old man. He didn’t really [give me a hard time], but if he did I probably would be out of the house. He did point his finger in people’s faces all the time but he couldn’t do that to me.
NEXT: Renny'soutfits, her love of candy bars, and her take on April...
For the record, Big Brother fans, Ollie is his last name and Bryan is his first! Since there was already a Brian in the house, CBS didn't want you to get confused! Wasn't that nice? Now that we've got that cleared up, let's talk to the 27-year-old marketing sales rep from Iowa about how Dan gave him the total shaft. (Also, click here to read my exit interview with last night's other ousted player, Michelle Costa.)
ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY: So are you willing to admit you got played bigtime? Bryan Ollie: Uh, I just let my heart get in the way of the game. That was a mistake on my part.
Now that you've had the night to think about it, how do you feel about Dan's game play now?
I don't feel any different than I felt before. Everyone does what they can to make an impact, but his decision could come back and backfire. I could come back to get him.
In retrospect, do you think you should have dangled on that rope a little longer during the HOH competition, or would you have trusted Dan all over again?
If I had to do it all over again, I would make the same deal [Editor's note: What the ??!@@**!?!]. My back was against the wall. I had to do anything I could at that point to gain a little leverage, to turn things around in the game. Obviously, it didn't work in my favor, but in the same situation, I'd do the same thing again [Editor's note: See above].
Look who got backdoored! EW.com talked to Big Brother's Michelle Costa, the 28-year-old real estate agent from Rhode Island, about Dan's devilish deal with Ollie, the red leotard, and what she hopes to say to Libra once she goes to the jury house.
ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY: Before I begin, I have to ask: Your bio says you were the only one to object at your brother's wedding. Did it work? Did you stop the ceremony? Michelle Costa: No, it didn't work. They said I was the crazy sister who was upset at losing her brother, so they actually took me out of the church. Let's put it this way: I didn't like the girl, but they separated three years from the day they got married, so I was right on the money.
You don't know who was evicted after you last night, right?
No! I can't wait to see their face! I'm hoping it's either Dan or one of the two girls so I can say, "I told you so!" They whisked me away, so I didn't get to see anything.
You seemed really worked up while talking with Julie Chen. Did you sleep okay last night?
I didn't get much sleep last night. I'm trying to put everything in perspective. I'm hoping it's a big dream, and I'll wake up and still be in the house. I just didn't like the way I was put out of the house because of someone else's deal. If they want to take me out, be man enough to say they wanted me out. They were honestly afraid of me. I wish they had the cojones to tell me that.
Okay, I'm done talking about Coach. For now anyway, let's turn our
attention to Stephen and one of my favorite quotes of this episode:
EW talked to Dan Gheesling, the 25-year-old Catholic school teacher from Michigan and quite possibly the nicest winner in Big Brother history, about his landslide victory, his thoughts about Jerry and what his girlfriend Monica asked him once the show was over.(Catch Josh Wolk's 
EW.com talked to Jerry MacDonald, the 75-year-old great-grandpa from Texas, about feeling lonely in the house, fighting with Dan, and how he didn’t really touch April’s boobs in the beginning of the season. (When you're done reading, click 
Keesha Smith, 
EW.com spoke to 
For the record, Big Brother fans, Ollie is his last name and Bryan is his first! Since there was already a Brian in the house, CBS didn't want you to get confused! Wasn't that nice? Now that we've got that cleared up, let's talk to the 27-year-old marketing sales rep from Iowa about how Dan gave him the total shaft. (Also, click 
Look who 
