Which other clangy kitchen utensils could replace Elisabeth Hasselbeck on 'The View'?

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Lisa Wed, Feb 25, 2009 at 04:34 PM EST

Marjorie McAllister: Elisabeth can't get a word in edge wise??? You must have the wrong program because I watch The View everyday and that girl never shuts up!!!! And today, 2/25/09 Elisabeth said MSNBC's Chris Matthews was biased and unobjective. If I had been anywhere near her when she said this I would have stuck her precious FOX News channel down her know-it-all throat. Fox News is the most biased and unobjective news channel on TV!!!! Why doesn't she complain about Hannity not being objective??? The girl is just so naive and unintelligent it makes me sick.

Donna Fri, Nov 7, 2008 at 06:15 PM EST

I would welcome an INTELLIGENT right wing view. Unfortunately Elisabeth doesn't fit the bill.

Elisabeth Sat, Nov 1, 2008 at 09:35 AM EST

As a fellow Elisabeth with an S, at least spell her name right on these boards. I don't really care if she's on the View that I don't watch, or Fox News that I don't watch.

elizabeth Thu, Oct 23, 2008 at 12:14 PM EST

I think that Elisabeth should kn ow when to hold them and when to fold them. She talks way too fadt and interrupts too, too much. I wonder if she will live thru the day on Nov. 5th if Obama wins the election, if she does, maybe she will keep her nasal sounding mouth for a while, however, I doubt it, I sure do piry her poor husban, I am suree she wers the pants in that household, with a mouth like hers, who could put up with it, just let her have her way. I can barely stand to watch the view because of her.

Heather Thu, Oct 23, 2008 at 10:25 AM EST

Why are you all so scared of hearing opposing viewpoints? If Elizabeth wasn't on the View, it would be a one-sided pep rally for liberals, which is both boring to watch and misleading to anybody ignorant enough to believe that these b-list has-beens have any clue what their talking about. How about an episode where they actually have an open discussions of the policies and issues of this campaign? Then again, that might alienate their ignorance-is-bliss viewership. Educate yourselves and become an informed voter. But be careful, you might come dangerously close to thinking for yourself.

Thu, Oct 23, 2008 at 10:24 AM EST

I am a conservative , as of this week, who no longer watches the View. Hasslebeck's ill-informed comments have finally done me in. The kool aid comments were just too much. A Christian would never belittle the deaths of thousands to make a point in an argument. May be its time the View found a true conservative to make educated, logical, and rational comments.

Latisha Jackson Sun, Oct 12, 2008 at 01:49 PM EST

The show is an embarrassment to women. They all come across as irrational shrews with their own close minded political agendas. Barbara Walters has seen her best days and needs fade away. The rest of the panel just needs to disappear.

Maureen Wed, Oct 8, 2008 at 08:54 PM EST

I think it's time for Elisabeth to go. I may not be the sharpest knife in the drawer but at least I am in the drawer!!!

Marjorie McAllister Wed, Oct 8, 2008 at 10:23 AM EST

Thank god there is at least one intelligent woman on the View. I applaud Elizabeth for speaking her mind, unfortunately she is surrounded by ignorant, one sided lefties and she can't get a word in edge wise. I really hope the American people take a look at the actual FACTS and not get duped by Obama's eloquence. Bottom line he does not have a proven track record of getting anything done in Washington. He’s just a bunch of fluff.

LP Thu, Oct 2, 2008 at 03:38 PM EST

Replace Hasselbeck with the disgarded mop from the Swiffer commercials. About as intelligent as she is.

Jayne Thu, Oct 2, 2008 at 12:43 PM EST

I can't stand Joy and Barbara and I think Elizabeth is the only fresh shining light on this show. If she leaves, I'm done! The rest are old bitter women who have nothing else to do with their lives. GET OVER the political views and get on to what I for one as a stay-at-home Mom and wife want to focus on -- guest stars, cooking etc. FORGET their intro talks! This show is going WAY down hill fast. Elizabeth, LOVE YOU!

Terri Thu, Oct 2, 2008 at 12:44 AM EST

I liked EH in the beginning and I can except her political view. What I don't like is all the screaming and yelling that goes on. I have to get out of the tv room because it frightens me and makes the yelling seem violent. I do not like violence. I feel sad that she is leaving and sad that they all can't just except people for who they are without getting angry. The View has been an informative program for me once the anger is put away. EH might not want to push her point so much and the others need not jump her for her views. What happen to just listening?

FRANK Wed, Oct 1, 2008 at 10:22 PM EST

THE VIEW STINKS !!!!!!!!!!!!

Derek Hotman Wed, Oct 1, 2008 at 04:18 PM EST

If Elizabeth leaves "The View", the show will officially degrade to "Sex in the City - Granny Style"!

ABQ Gal Wed, Oct 1, 2008 at 03:32 PM EST

I feel for Elisabeth. She cannot help that she is young and not 100% sure of herself yet.

The View needs an older, feistier, non emotional, conservative to take her place. Barbara has not assembled a "view" that represents the American public. There should be at least 2 conservatives on that panel.

I cannot stand Barbara Walters. She is pretty disloyal to her co-hosts and very condescending. She has stabbed Debbie Matenopoulos, Star Jones, Rosie O'Donnell, and now it appears, Elisabeth Hasselback, in their backs. Lisa Ling and Meredith Viera were smart to leave when they did.

BTW...Check the cable news ratings at the link below. Fox KILLS every other cable news channel in EVERY SINGLE time period. And to Kim in Kentucky...O'Reilly had 4,650,000 viewers for his first show this past Monday (9/29). His 2nd broadcast (same show) that evening added nearly 2 million more!

http://tvbythenumbers.com/2008/10/01/cable-news-ratings-for-monday-september-29/5439#more-54

poppy Mon, Sep 29, 2008 at 12:54 PM EST

good riddins!!!!!!!!!

poppy Mon, Sep 29, 2008 at 12:53 PM EST

good riddins!!!!!!!!!

poppy Mon, Sep 29, 2008 at 12:53 PM EST

good riddins!!!!!!!!!

Amber Tue, Sep 23, 2008 at 09:36 PM EST

YES!!!! Please say it's true!! I can't STAND HER!!! YES!!!!

Mark Tue, Sep 23, 2008 at 03:19 PM EST

Who cares? This program and Hasselbeck couldn't be any less relevant.

Jake Tue, Sep 23, 2008 at 02:02 PM EST

I think people need to keep in mind that Hasselbeck is 31 years old. Her political opinions are solely based on her religion and nothing else. People like her make me sad the same way the girls at the religious compounds do. They're all so helplessly naive.

Annette Tue, Sep 23, 2008 at 09:07 AM EST

I don't know why FOX even wants Elizabeth, but then why does CNN and MSNBC want people like Campbell Brown, Blitzer, Matthews, Olbermann or Maddows; and why FOX wants O'Reilly or Hannity??
With the women on the view being quoted as saying:
"The sun is closer to the earth than our moon is during the winter months, right?"
"Men like women with big breasts. I think women with small breasts should make sure their husbands aren't gay"

Why would anyone take them seriously? Especially the News media? This just shows what our News media is worth:
low IQ, ignorant, uneducated. They dress nice, get enough plastic surgery to look nice, and are empty between the ears - and we remain silent! When are we going to get serious and demand the media bring in professionals that learn more than reading skills at university? We should demand that they be voted in by the public just like government because in a way - they are the 4th branch of government!!

nhdogmom Mon, Sep 22, 2008 at 10:06 AM EST

I will CELEBRATE if Elisabeth is finally gone! I don't think I have ever had anyone irritate me so much as this woman. She spouts conservative garbage without giving one word of what she is saying any serious thought. Sherri doesn't thrill me...but EH needs to go to Fox and carry on her Ann Coulter "wanna be" act.

Colby Sun, Sep 21, 2008 at 07:14 PM EST

Elisabeth leaving? What took so long? I tuned out during the 2004 when she was openly hostile to John and Elizabeth Edwards. I'm voting GOP this year, so it's not that I disagree with her conservative view point, just that she is too irrelevant to articulate them.

How about we really show diversity on the show and hire a man?

Fred Sun, Sep 21, 2008 at 01:49 PM EST

If EH leaves, another woman with a conservative viewpoint should be added. Differing opinions are what makes The View interesting. FOX job would be perfect for her - no need to listen to others. She is emotionally immature and doesn't see the grays in life - - only black or white, right or wrong. Maybe she'll grow out of that. I'll continue to watch The View no matter what happens with EH.

proud2bliberal Sun, Sep 21, 2008 at 08:30 AM EST

fox is a propaganda machine who lied to the american people quoting bush chenney and has never taken responsibility or apologized for it
eliz is the same
why isnt her husband serving if the cause is so honorable and vital to our countrys existence if i really thought that was true i would be serving

DitchTheHarpy Sat, Sep 20, 2008 at 10:40 PM EST

Bobbi, having a college degree does NOT disqualify one from being a moron. George W. Bush has a college degree - biggest moron on the planet.Hmmm .... lord help us, that Hasselbeck nitwit could be president some day! Shudder!

DitchTheHarpy Sat, Sep 20, 2008 at 10:40 PM EST

Bobbi, having a college degree does NOT disqualify one from being a moron. George W. Bush has a college degree - biggest moron on the planet.Hmmm .... lord help us, that Hasselbeck nitwit could be president some day! Shudder!

Anella Sat, Sep 20, 2008 at 10:23 PM EST

Elizabeth should go to Fox News. She's little more than a mouthpiece for them anyway and practically every word she utters comes from their air waves.

beezersmum Sat, Sep 20, 2008 at 05:07 PM EST

I am surprised Barbara or Whoopi has not punched her in the last few weeks. I am all for having an intelligent discussion with differing points of view. The problem with EH is that while Barbara bends over backwards to try to present all sides of an issue,EH jumps in, interrupts, and directs her stupid comments completely away from the topic. When any of the other ladies tries to clarify the original topic, she jumps into Republican lockstep and shouts something off the topic just to drown out the others. If she would stay on the topic or give a direct answer it would not bother me as much. The point of the show is to present different views. I just wish everyone would be able to finish a point before being interrupted. I hope EH does go to FOX and the View gets another conservative who can have a discussion instead of a shouting match in her place.

Bobbi Sat, Sep 20, 2008 at 04:39 PM EST

Elisabeth actually has a degree from Boston College. She is not a moron. She barely has a chance to form a coherent sentence with the four harpies jumping on her neck. Joy, in particular, never lets her complete a thought. Barbara is condescending and patronizing. I agree that it would be better for them to have an older woman so the existing group would stop treating the person with conservative views like everything they say is invalid simply because of their age.

mj Sat, Sep 20, 2008 at 01:54 PM EST

Ive never been a Hasselbeck fan and never understood how she got this gig with so many more talented folks out there. And it has notthing to do with her political views. I think they would probably need to find a GOP replacement or at least a leaning GOP replacement and given the demos, theyd be smart to try tofind a Latina (remember they had a finalist in the past- Rachel from Real World fame). Elizabeth just doesnt have the experience and I think her personality is dull compared to the other hosts. I wish i were female as this would be my dream job. As for fox news, that just seems crazy as she has no experience as a journalist but then again fox hasnt shown itself as the 'fair and balanced ' network it promotes itself as

marinak Sat, Sep 20, 2008 at 01:27 PM EST

Dear J.R.

ROSE MCGOWAN is Rosie's Second or third cousin.Ah....not a good choice.

Marlo Sat, Sep 20, 2008 at 01:23 PM EST

Hurray! Elisabeth is one of the most inflexible, uptight, self righteous idiots I have ever encountered on TV or in person! I cannot believe that someone else would even hire her. She has no talent other than being loud and obnoxious! Whoever wants her, take her. The show will improve by leaps and bounds. She and Rosie couldn't get along because they are different sides of the same anal retentive coin.

wakeforce Sat, Sep 20, 2008 at 01:08 PM EST

I hope this is more than a rumor. Elizabeth is the least interesting person on the view. She is not funny nor entertaining. Her only claim to fame is that she was a big, fat loser on survivor. She makes me want to throw things at my tv.

DR Sat, Sep 20, 2008 at 12:52 PM EST

Elisabeth Hasselbeck is neither smart nor entertaining. Her voice is like nails on a chalkboard. Fox News is exactly where a moron like her belongs. "The View" would be much better off with a genuinely intelligent and appealing conservative, somebody who can articulate her viewpoints without resorting to histrionic screeching. Although I understand that someone like that can be hard to find.

Stephanie T. Sat, Sep 20, 2008 at 12:41 PM EST

I am not a Democrat. The problem I have with Hasselbeck is that while she speaks her mind, she tends to overreact. The overreactions make her look a bit immature. And with the Rosie/Elizabeth fight, I thought both acted as if they were fighting over a pail in a sandbox.

Truth Sat, Sep 20, 2008 at 10:00 AM EST

Barbara Walters should change the name of the show to "As Long As You Share My Views"

auzdaz Sat, Sep 20, 2008 at 09:47 AM EST

Wow, who knew that Democrats were so scared of a women who speaks her mind. So much for women rights, just as long as they fit your own right? Elizabeth rocks, she's smart and entertaining. I would love to see her on FOXNEWS.

kim in kentucky Sat, Sep 20, 2008 at 09:35 AM EST

update -- MSNBC's ratings are going up and O'Reiley's are going down

Stephanie T. Sat, Sep 20, 2008 at 09:31 AM EST

Kitchen Utensil: A hot pot for a hot head. Hot pots are used by college students to make a quick bowl of soup.

As for new view host: Henrietta Hippo. Then it'll be called the Nu Zoo Re-view. :-) Kidding. Andonda Lewis (that is if Babs can find her), or Jennifer Lopez'es sister who is a news anchor.

queen of disrepair Sat, Sep 20, 2008 at 08:51 AM EST

Hmmm....Patricia Heaton, Christie Todd Whitman, Carly Fiorina, Peggy Noonan, lots of interesting and highly outspoken women - let's stop pretending that the demo for "The View" needs shebots like Elisabeth to maintain viability. God bless Fox for rewarding her ability to toe the party line. Let's have someone with a determined party view who is able to discuss not fuss about what the issues are. As long as they don't hire that horribly horrific Michelle Malcontent Malkin, I'll maintain a twinge of interest.

mdb Sat, Sep 20, 2008 at 08:50 AM EST

I tuned the show out when the Star Jones wedding debacle started. I have tuned in rarely since and each time had to turn it off because of the pointless inane arguing. I think I once heard an intelligent discussion on the show. I have never thought much of EH but since Sherri joined EH looks positively brilliant. Time to call it a day for the View. I am sure EH will be happier surrounded by those who share her limited view of the world.

Kristy Tru Sat, Sep 20, 2008 at 08:34 AM EST

Elizabeth is always so angry. She always on the defensive. She is there to give her view not scream her view.

Jessica Sat, Sep 20, 2008 at 08:02 AM EST

I say, don't let the door hit ya on the way out... good riddance, she's a nuisance. I do think they should get another conservative, though, just to keep the talk interesting and to keep some semblance of balance. Just get a conservative with common sense, not another wacko (like Elizabeth or Sarah Palin).

J.R. Sat, Sep 20, 2008 at 03:58 AM EST

DREW BARRYMORE
Alyssa Milano
Amber Tamblyn
Christina Applegate
Courtney Cox
Debra Messing
Helen Hunt
Jeri Ryan
ROSE MCGOWAN
Vicki Lawrence

Just a few who come to mind....

matt Sat, Sep 20, 2008 at 03:20 AM EST

okay marnie I admit Elisabeth does get a little too emotional at times we can give her a break, she's attacked by the other hosts simply for having the audacity to have her own opinion which is what the whole show is supposed to be about. Olbermann on the other hand almost cry's and has a tantrum because the GOP has the audacity to play a 9/11 tribute video, he wont allow anyone on who holds different views, in fact he thinks they are criminals or nazis! Are you sure its not the crying that bothers you but that you just don't like Elisabeth because she has a different view than you?

Marnie Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 11:19 PM EST

I hope its not just a rumor. If Elizabeth does exist they should replace her with someone more moderate. Someone who can get their point across without crying and going into hysterics. Personally I love MSNBC, Keith Olbemann is a cant miss!

hillbilly Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 11:00 PM EST

Hot diggity dang! I'm gonna watch me some Fox news channel! Ain't nothin' better than watching that purty Elizabeth Hassaback along with that O'Reilly fella whilst I'm a cleanin' my huntin' rifle, prayin' to baby Jesus, and a thinkin' bout how much I hate them homersexals. We's Republicans love that! Yee haw!

aps Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 10:49 PM EST

wow. for being the party of tolerance and acceptance, there sure is a mean spirit here among the dems.

as for msnbc, I think when they come out and have to change their "news" anchors due to complete bias in basic coverage their is a problem. While Fox and CNN both have their respective viewpoints (undeniably), they mostly keep OBSCENE bias out of general news stories. There is a reason MSNBC ratings are the lowest of all the stations.

A. Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 10:39 PM EST

Hasselback is a bigoted Republican mouthpiece. Can they please boot her and do what they should have done in the first place and bring Kathy Griffin on? Kathy and Whoopi and Joy would cancel out Barbra's boring non-denom stance and Sherri's super-christian bs.

NutHouse Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 10:19 PM EST

A sad day for journalism. Apparently at Fox you do not need an education or high IQ to report on the news, just a republican bias. I cannot wait for her to leave so I can watch the View again.

Terry Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 10:10 PM EST

If she leaves then I'm not watching, I can't stand watching an all-liberal panel. I like having it mixed. Hasselbeck doens't bother me at all.

Johnny Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 09:33 PM EST

mscisluv:I could not agree with you more. I have no problem with a conservative voice on the panel, and there should be one to get the discussions going, as ninedaves pointed out. But her perspective on everything is black or white, right or wrong, here or there and the way she carries herself makes her even less likeable.

kim in kentucky Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 07:31 PM EST

AMEN!

Allison Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 07:08 PM EST

I think that the most offensive thing about this show is that it buys into the television stereotype that "average" women won't want to watch EDUCATED women on television. I realize that EDUCATED and REPUBLICAN is an oxymoron, but there has to be some woman out there somewhere, right?I really miss Lisa Ling. Who would have ever thought that someone could be WORSE than Debbie Matenopoulos? Does anyone else remember that Elisabeth was a shoe designer who was a REALITY TV SHOW CONTESTANT? I weep for the future of America . . . does no woman value education any more?

kim in kentucky Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 06:59 PM EST

no MSNBC is news -- Fox is simply empty noise - no its almost fake news presented as "fair and balanced" - misinformation is given almost everyday and never corrected or apologized for

carr Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 06:21 PM EST

I agree that Elizabet isn't the greatest conservative voice out there, but it would be good to have one on the show. That being said, I think the charges of homophobes and rednecks are out of line. That's an inaccurate judgement of people, something that liberals rip conservatives apart for doing...and moreso, there are homophobes and rednecks on both sides of the aisle.
I'm not going to get into a Fox News debate with anyone, but I think we should all admit that a channel like MSNBC is probably even worse.
but back to the issue at hand, my opinion is that everybody on the View is getting kinda old and tired, Dem or Rep

kim in kentucky Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 06:08 PM EST

a kitchen utensil? hmmmm, well maybe not a utensil, but how about a recording of a garbage disposal going full force? of course, she doesn't swallow the garbage - she spews it out! and worse (like most bullies), she's loud, won't give a direct answer and won't anyone else talk once they get going!!

thad Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 05:56 PM EST

any other idiot from survivor, or kathy griffin

arryana Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 04:56 PM EST

i say they choose bristol palin - if sarah palin is good enough to be second in command (should the country not learn its lesson yet again), then her 17-year old daughter should be equally prepared to represent the conservatives!

mscisluv Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 04:43 PM EST

While I disagree with most of what Elisabeth has to say, her real problem is that she comes off as ignorant and childish. The View needs to find a smart, thoughtful woman with a conservative leaning. One exists, right?

Stephanie T. Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 04:14 PM EST

Anchor? Does she have a journalism degree?

marinak Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 04:09 PM EST

One minute.I guess I didn't read the article properly !Is she leaving or might she be leaving?Oh Barbara what luck if she leaves!!Mazel Tov!!!!!

NineDaves.com Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 04:08 PM EST

coming from the guy who watches the view every single day, i'm going to say it: elizabeth hassleback is right for the show. yes, her views are insane. but they are different. they get discussion going. so if she was going to leave? i'd say throw another crazy republican in there. patricia heaton!

marinak Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 04:04 PM EST

Poor Barbara Walters has to keep her.Lets face it she got rid of Debbie Matanopoulos first(rightly so).Lisa Ling left for what seemed greener pastures.Star pulled a nova and was made a black hole.Rosie ended up going over the deep end.Meridith Viara couldn't take the cat fights and realized she didn't have to take it any longer.Lets face it Joy Behar is the ultimate sourpuss she-dog . What is truly sad is that she believes she's intelligent but a veteran on the show.Walters can't sack Elizabeth as it would only make her seem like a nasty liberal.
It isn't that Elizabeth is a conservative IT'S THAT SHE'S JUST PLAIN STUPID AND A HAS REALLY BAD TASTE IN CLOTHES.

I've GOT TO GET A LIFE!!!!

Crafty Chica Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 03:58 PM EST

THEY NEED A LATINA!!

Dennis N. Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 03:19 PM EST

New uproar record! Nine comments in! And with a topic as droll as The View, no less!

to Thomas Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 03:10 PM EST

who are the other ladies on 'the view' racist against? explain your exaggerated remarks.

JohnO Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 03:08 PM EST

Thank You Annie! The title alone made me laugh out loud. I needed that.

fancypants Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 03:08 PM EST

wow, this is great news! she's finally leaving. i may watch the view again after she's gone, but sherri sheperd might be too much of an idiot for me to tolerate.

fancypants Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 03:08 PM EST

wow, this is great news! she's finally leaving. i may watch the view again after she's gone, but sherri sheperd might be too much of an idiot for me to tolerate.

LynB Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 03:07 PM EST

Mother Teresa,
Thank you for ruining the name of a wonderful, giving caring woman. Please keep your hate to a minimum especially if you keep using this name.

Dennis N. Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 03:03 PM EST

Move over, Megyn Kelly!

Fox News nabbed a fresher, cuter, more submissive-to-patriarchy face of conservative republicanism!

As for her ideal kitchen-utensil replacement, I vote for:

A Magic Bullet. Deceptively simple, malfunctions far too quickly, and loudly blends any crap you can imagine to stuff within its confines without pause.

Thomas Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 03:03 PM EST

How about we leave Elisabeth and replace all the others with pots and pans or clucking chickens...but that is what they already are. Elisabeth is the only one who is not a racist socialist.

motherteresa Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 02:38 PM EST

I can't believe that Elizabeth is still on television let alone The View. She will feel right at home at Fox with all the other homophobic out of touch rednecks. She can then preach her bs and no one will not want to punch her in the face. I would replace her with a fork because it will remind the others that they would rather stab themselves in their own eyes than listen to her babble one more time.

Annie B. Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 02:35 PM EST

Correct, Bobby Rowe -- and I should have mentioned that Annie Barrett actually is available at Williams-Sonoma.

DanOregon Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 02:33 PM EST

So I guess she'd take the 5 p.m. hour if it's true? It might also be that she saw what happened to Star Jones once the audience didn't like her anymore.
There are plenty more conservatives who could do a better job representing their perspective than EH. Her biggest problem is a lack of introspection.

Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 02:31 PM EST

Shocker, a conservative nutter taking a job at "fair and balanced" Fox news...

b0bbyr0we Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 02:29 PM EST

Wait I take that back. Screw conservative. ANNIE BARRETT.

b0bbyr0we Fri, Sep 19, 2008 at 02:28 PM EST

For a show supposed to be a diverging panel of Views, its been pretty weak with EH as the only conservative voice for a while, mostly because she's so weak. Someone smart, young, and not already a celebrity. I don't have any names but I'm sure there are plenty out there.

Or, one of those rubber circles you use to open jars. They are so underrepresented on television, and don't even make noise. Win-win!