Quiznos' ad disclaimer makes me want to gag (on $5 bill)

The Dark Knight Mon, Mar 30, 2009 at 10:14 PM EST

you know i think this whole entire commercial is wrong its just not cool especially its kinda weird and sick how the oven is talking and telling the guy to "put it in me" which just isn't right for a television ad and how the oven wants him to say it with more passion everytime

Vince Tue, May 13, 2008 at 11:10 PM EST

Wait...so there's 5 dollar foot longs at Quizno's too? Nice, this is good news for starving college students like me.

Oh yeah, disclaimers suck.

Mimi Tue, May 13, 2008 at 04:20 PM EST

In this economy you can't AFFORD to eat $5 :)

Babs Tue, May 13, 2008 at 11:18 AM EST

Whattaya mean the gecko's not talking? He opens his mouth, words come out. That's talking. Next you'll try to tell me he doesn't drive a tiny car either.

GingerCat Tue, May 13, 2008 at 10:27 AM EST

The disclaimers are there because people are stupid. Remember the 13-year-old who set himself on fire after watching Jacka**--and then blamed the show?
Kodak used to make a disposable camera called "The Weekender" and actually got calls from people asking if it was OK to use it during the week.
People are becoming more idiotic all the time, so I don't blame any company that wants to cover its own a** with disclaimers.

Nix Tue, May 13, 2008 at 08:37 AM EST

Unfortunately, natural selection does not disfavor "stupidity", but rather overintelligence. So let's not let survival of the fittest rule human interaction. It's been tried, to horrific effect.
Besides, THE GECKO ISN'T ACTUALLY TALKING?!? omg apocalyspe 2012 someone get the thirteen skulls together NOW—!

Eilonwyl Mon, May 12, 2008 at 05:32 PM EST

welcome to America, the country where you can file the most stupid lawsuits and WIN........ until we grow up as a nation and accept responsibility for our ow actions........these types of disclaimers will continue!

Kate Mon, May 12, 2008 at 05:28 PM EST

Ha ha ha...thank you! It drove me nuts seeing that stupid disclaimer about not eating the $5. In this day and age who would waste $5 like that anyways?

Snarf Mon, May 12, 2008 at 05:00 PM EST

Stupidity should not be punishable by death. Just take the warning labels off of everything and let the problem take care of itself.

Morgan Mon, May 12, 2008 at 04:35 PM EST

i was just thinking how horrible and icky this ad was the other day. i didn't even notice the disclaimer..

TheBookPolice Mon, May 12, 2008 at 03:46 PM EST

I'm just ready for the horribly over-mic'ed audible chewing phenomenon to FINALLY COME TO A MERCIFUL END. How does that noise convince anyone to buy your product? If you heard someone doing it that loudly in person, you'd either walk away or ask them to keep it down.

tina Mon, May 12, 2008 at 03:31 PM EST

It's the 'I'm gonna sue' mentality of America that has led to this stupidity. Greed. It's an epidemic.

Stephanie T. Mon, May 12, 2008 at 03:04 PM EST

Yeah Jane, or this medication will cause constipation,etc. It makes you wonder why someone would want to take the medication to begin with?

Jane Mon, May 12, 2008 at 03:01 PM EST

My current favorite is the one where the guy jumps off hte building onto the entirely bubblewrapped city. Oh, I shouldn't try and bubblewrap New York, and then jump off the Empire State Building. I also have a problem with prescription drug commercials. Aside from the moral issue of them spending money on advertising that comes from overcharging the sick people who need the drugs, do I really need that cardiologist telling his male patient that he shouldn't use this heart med while pregnant or nursing. If I remember my sex-ed correctly from school, men don't get pregnant, nor do they nurse, because we're not seahorses.

birdgirl39 Mon, May 12, 2008 at 02:55 PM EST

Seems only stupid people are breeding. They allow the TV to educate their offspring, and everyone wonders why civilization is crumbling. Check out this site:
http://darwinawards.com/
Just let the idiots kill themselves.

Stephanie T. Mon, May 12, 2008 at 02:46 PM EST

Yeah but still while they were idiots, young kids should have parental supervision when watching stuff like that.

cap Mon, May 12, 2008 at 02:41 PM EST

Quizno's really needs a new ad team - anyone remember those dancing rats they had for awhile?!

Also, on the cupholder in my car is a warning "DO NOT PLACE HARD OBJECTS IN CUPHOLDER - USE SOFT CUPS" I looked closer and there is an illustration of someone bending over and hitting their head on a cup in the cupholder. Gotta love it.

djbear Mon, May 12, 2008 at 02:15 PM EST

If someone is dumb enough to try eating a $5 bill as the lady does in the commercial they would be to dumb to have been able to read the disclaimer! I avoid Quizno's anyway, I'm a Subway kind of guy!

S Mon, May 12, 2008 at 02:06 PM EST

I once saw a bag of frozen vegetables for which the first cooking instruction was "Take bag out of freezer." Who was trying to cook them in the freezer?

kayethx Mon, May 12, 2008 at 01:52 PM EST

Ugh. Does this remind anyone else of "So Long and Thanks for All the Fish"? It's enough to make you stay on the Outside of the Asylum with Wonko the Sane.

Freddie Mon, May 12, 2008 at 01:48 PM EST

Which is worse: the annoying prevalence of these types of disclaimers, or the fact that a good chunk of the population actually warrants having these disclaimers in place? Some of these you can rationalize (e.g. to Nose's comment: w/o having any other details it may be that that particular company puts a disclaimer on all its products that may have trace amounts of nuts, due to those who have severe allergies, and so in this case sticking it on a bag of nuts yields an obvious result). To "I hate dumb people": well, there is no trying to rationalize something like that. Let Darwin play out if it must.

Anna Mon, May 12, 2008 at 01:44 PM EST

I agree that there are some real idiots out there that need to be told that McDonald's coffee is hot or that Sunlight lemon dishwashing detergent isn't suitable to make lemonade. One guy sued Kelloggs and won because he burned himself on a Pop-tart so now there's a disclaimer on the package to let people know that Pop-tarts get hot in the toaster. Companies have lost millions due to these idiots so the rest of us get to be treated as if we have no common sense.

My favorite disclaimer on air at the moment is the one where their swinging the truck (Chevy, I think)around in a centrifuge and a warning comes on for us to not try this at home. I wonder how anyone watching that commercial could possibly recreate that stunt.

mscisluv Mon, May 12, 2008 at 01:36 PM EST

Stephanie T. - Actually, it was proven that the idiots that threw the bowling ball off the overpass just used Beavis & Butthead as an excuse after the fact. They actually did not do it because of the show; they just wanted a good defense.

I hate dumb people Mon, May 12, 2008 at 01:25 PM EST

There used to be what I believe was a Nissan commercial, which had an SUV come flying out of an erupting volcano and then drive away. At the bottom of the screen you could see a disclaimer, "Do Not Attempt". Really? Do not attempt to shoot my car out of an erupting volcano? That was my next vacation

m@ Mon, May 12, 2008 at 01:16 PM EST

Yes, the disclaimer is unnecessary. But I actually really enjoy that Quizno's ad!

Stephanie T. Mon, May 12, 2008 at 01:05 PM EST

Sometimes disclaimers don't work because some kids can't read fast enough. It's really important that parents sit with their young ones when they watch cartoons. Looney Tunes, Woody Woodpecker, and Tom and Jerry were cartoons that were shown in theaters before a feature film. Kids began to watch them on television years later. Now, some kids knew what was real and what wasn't. However, when Beavis and Butthead came out, that theory changed. There was one incident in which two kids threw a bowling bowl off of a highway overpass, smashing through the roof of a car and killing a child. After that happened, B&B was shown at a later time.

Jennifer Mon, May 12, 2008 at 12:39 PM EST

I hate the car ads that let us know that the dangerous stunts are being performed a "professional driver on a closed course," ESPECIALLY when all the car is doing is driving down a straight road. Argh!

Nose Mon, May 12, 2008 at 12:31 PM EST

This isn't from an ad, but I have a similar peeve...I was in a grocery store once, and was walking past the bulk food section. There was a bag of BBQ peanuts there, and on the bag....of BBQ peanuts...there was a warning sticker that said, "May Contain Nuts." Come on, people!

Nikki Mon, May 12, 2008 at 12:30 PM EST

Unfortunately, "plaintiff is an idiot" is not a valid defense at law. The amount of effort it takes to put up a disclaimer is so minimal that there's no way a company that didn't use one and got sued would be able to escape damages.

Winona Mon, May 12, 2008 at 12:22 PM EST

I love how the lawyers have to cover all the bases because of a couple stoopid people. My favorite ones I found recently were on my curling iron (which advises you "Do not put in eye") and my hair dryer ("Do not use while sleeping").

Misnomer Mon, May 12, 2008 at 12:22 PM EST

Ugh! Yes, I totally agree with you, Slezak! I find those disclaimers so ridiculous! But, they ARE there for a reason. People are very stupid, as we've seen time and again in the news (like all those teenage boys that hurt or killed themselves trying to recreate stunts they saw on Jackass). We are such a litigious society that anyone will file a lawsuit for any dumb ol' reason.