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Things That Make Me Die Inside (Vol. 17)

Mar 13, 2007, 11:33 AM | by Michael Slezak

Categories: Reality TV, Television, Things That Make Me Die Inside

So get this: As NBC mulls the fate of quality series like 30 Rock and Medium, it's also greenlit Baby Borrowers, a new version of a British reality series built around the idea of folks lending out their infant children to teenage couples — all in the name of comedy (with a message), the show's producer tells Variety. And what exactly is that message? Don't drop little Tiffany — her skull isn't fully formed? It's not easy supporting a newborn's neck? Or maybe that parents have a price when it comes to lending out their wee ones in the name of light entertainment? Or that a higher power is overdue to smite The Peacock?

Okay, so I'm being a little hysterical here. Apparently, Baby Borrowers will follow teenage couples as they're put in charge of caring for an infant for several days, before graduating to a toddler, a pre-teen, a young teenager and even a senior citizen. (The series is an equal opportunity exploiter, so be gentle when you clean and re-bandage Great Aunt Myrna's bed sores! On second thought, whatever, she's just happy we let her out of the home!) Yeah, the show's executive producer claims that when the series aired in England, "there was initial consternation from some organizations about the notion of 'lending babies to teenagers for a reality show'... without asking us about the extensive and impeccable health and safety measures put in place," but somehow, that doesn't make the whole concept more palatable to me. I mean, would you want the health and well being of your own baby, or your great-grandfather, placed in the hands of, say, the gals of My Super Sweet Sixteen? And what will make the teenagers at the heart of Baby Borrowers any less fame-hungry and monstrous?

Bobby Mon, Jun 23, 2008 at 12:50 PM EST

As long as people watch, they'll keep making these shows. They're cheap and make money. I don't know, Baby Borrowers looks better than most of the reality dreck on television.

Average Sun, Jun 22, 2008 at 02:27 PM EST

Yeah, this show seems silly. Oh, and Friday Night Lights is returning! It will air on DirectTV first, then NBC or USA later.

Rob Roy Sat, Jun 21, 2008 at 03:53 PM EST

At least the elderly folks have a choice to be on there. The babies have no choice. I'm watching though! It is the idiot parent's fault if their kid gets messed up.

punkypower Wed, Jun 18, 2008 at 03:44 PM EST

I like how you brought up the grandparents, everyone is so concerned about the babies, but what about your dying grandparents, who would give them away? I still feel compelled to watch this show though.

louise foster Fri, Nov 2, 2007 at 06:58 AM EST

im doin a child care couse is there any thing that i hve deffernetly need to no about children xxx

teara thomas Fri, Sep 28, 2007 at 10:06 PM EST

cheeseburger i do i like you what do you look like

teara thomas Fri, Sep 28, 2007 at 10:04 PM EST

what does that mean what.......

teara thomas Fri, Sep 28, 2007 at 10:02 PM EST

your babies are so pretty i hope mine come out like that

Mel Thu, Mar 15, 2007 at 01:00 PM EST

What?!?!?!?! So the American Humane Society has to be around when scenes are shot with animals but who sticks around to make sure the kids aren't put through hell during filming?

Cheesburger Royale Wed, Mar 14, 2007 at 04:12 PM EST

Hey, does anyone remember that obnoxious anglo-arab chick from "Sweet Sixteen" that got the $100,000 Range Rover? Has there been anyone in the history of reality television that needed her teeth kicked in more?


Do you think she ever watches her episode and just wishes a hole could swallow her up? Or do you think she loves how badly she appeared?

toonces Wed, Mar 14, 2007 at 10:17 AM EST

um WHERE did my comment go from yesterday???

Ep Sato Wed, Mar 14, 2007 at 08:46 AM EST

The concept sounds awful, but I'm more disapointed to hear 30 Rock and Friday Night Lights are going the way of the dodo. I guess Jack isn't as in with the execs at GE as we were led to believe.

Mozz Tue, Mar 13, 2007 at 11:46 PM EST

Thanks Camp Firewood, I knew i was off about something... yes, CW, vomit green... still on programming... NBC, has vomit lickers to try to clean up their sad programing. (Veronica Mars and Heroes, being vomit free of course.)

Camp Firewood Tue, Mar 13, 2007 at 07:11 PM EST

Mozz, CW prefers to leave the vomit on its public offerings. Once licked clean, well, that elevates it to "not quite passable as entertainment" compared to the truly offensive fare CW favors.

Mozz Tue, Mar 13, 2007 at 06:51 PM EST

Camp Firewood is right, "throwing up a little" is not funny, especially, since that Baby Borrowers idea, was probably picked up from the vomit all over the floor, and licked clean, and put on the programming board, which makes me wonder why the show is not on the CW.

Camp Firewood Tue, Mar 13, 2007 at 05:21 PM EST

Saying something "made me throw up a little" isn't funny anymore. Sorry.

Catya Butterman Tue, Mar 13, 2007 at 05:19 PM EST

I have an idea for a sure-fire reality show hit -- have ordinary people run television networks for a few weeks and have network executive spend that time fishing somewhere in Canada.
Most likely outcomes? Sheer brilliance and ratings success on the part of average citizens. The network execs will probably have destroyed the Canadian ecosystem and brought global warming to Winnipeg. Clearly, the folks that would deep-six 30 Rock and greenlight the gasping holes of time suckage that are Studio 60 and (surely) Baby Borrowers are only capable of destruction.

Jane Tue, Mar 13, 2007 at 05:07 PM EST

If Medium and 30 Rock go away, so will I. That baby show sounds horrendous. Do you hear me NBC? HORRENDOUS!!!

Danna Tue, Mar 13, 2007 at 04:27 PM EST

I will hate NBC forever if they cancel 30 Rock.

Eli Tue, Mar 13, 2007 at 03:56 PM EST

wow, Baby Borrowers, just the idea made me throw up a little.

A Myrna Tue, Mar 13, 2007 at 03:53 PM EST

Oh Slezak... I love ya to pieces. You even have me cracking up when you make fun of my own name.

Duh? Tue, Mar 13, 2007 at 02:31 PM EST

Mento? Kat, Tina Fey is not a chewy piece of candy...as much as I wish she were!

Kat Tue, Mar 13, 2007 at 02:27 PM EST

Are they seriously considering not renewing 30 Rock??? This is the funniest show on television right now, along with the Office. Every Thursday I watch it twice. I want Tina Fey to be my mento!

mike Tue, Mar 13, 2007 at 02:12 PM EST

There was an NBC exec who early last fall said he hoped the network had all reality and game shows. While his network had all the potentially smart and interesting shows. Most have either been cancelled or are on life support. Choke on your reality NBC.

Byron Tue, Mar 13, 2007 at 02:06 PM EST

And here I was thinking the idea of a sitcom about the cavemen from the ads was a bad idea.

Who are these bozos who decide what to put on t.v.? Reality t.v. and mindless gameshows are killing our brain cells.

Cranky Tue, Mar 13, 2007 at 12:44 PM EST

I was about to write a scathing comment or two in response to this, but why bother when Karla said it all! Take an e-bow, please! And Slezak, thank you for continuing to point out that the emperor has no clothes.

Karla Tue, Mar 13, 2007 at 12:33 PM EST

I don't know why no one thought of this before. Using babies as props!

How neato of NBC to cheapen each and every stage of life and sell every conceivable aspect of humanity to the gaping, yawning, voracious maw that is American TV. Did you know that the "exec" in TV execs is short for execrable?

The problem is, after they've sold all the babies and the old people, and there's no one left to exploit, they're going to have to do shows about internal organs, disembodied spinal columns, and bodily fluids.

I wonder if they need any writers for a show called The Spleen?

Vicky Tue, Mar 13, 2007 at 12:30 PM EST

"I mean, would you want the health and well being of your own baby, or your great-grandfather, placed in the hands of, say, the gals of My Super Sweet Sixteen?"

No...never. That's really scary to think about.

Che Tue, Mar 13, 2007 at 12:20 PM EST

I actually lent my baby for the Argentine version of this show, and when I get her back in 2010, I'll let you know how it turned out!

Ceballos Tue, Mar 13, 2007 at 12:09 PM EST

The most frustrating thing is that NBC actually has more than enough quality shows to pull themselves out of 4th place if they actually marketed them correctly and supported them. They can dump all the doofy game shows and reality crap on Friday nights where they could dominate.

Matthew Tue, Mar 13, 2007 at 11:27 AM EST

Here's a question - why, despite being 4th, does NBC believe that a Sunday full of reality and "no scripted programming at 8pm" will actually improve their standings? Shows like Medium and 30 Rock keep the network distinct, fresh, and original. While I'd love to see LO and CI return, there are huge scheduling problems over there at NBC and Medium is only one victim of that, LO being another.

Here's hoping that if NBC doesn't keep Medium, CBS will make use of their syndication deal with Lifetime and, who knows, maybe TNT will pick up the 18th season of LO.

Craig Tue, Mar 13, 2007 at 10:52 AM EST

Medium is one of the smartest shows on television. It needs a better timeslot.

Phantom Tue, Mar 13, 2007 at 10:47 AM EST

In general, reality television makes me die inside. It's awful, exploitive, and it adds to the whole moronic, Springer-esque, "look at me" entitlement attitude that our country has adopted. Not everyone needs to be seen and heard - in fact, most of us don't.


Thank God that someone in Hollywood woke up and started writing shows again. Before shows like "The 4400" came out, television was like 85% reality. That was a dark time. All reality television needs to be scrapped.

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