Make a New Year's Resolution…for a sad celeb!

verete Ferter Sun, Jan 14, 2007 at 04:14 AM EST

I want to find additional info about BS.
Because I colect all about she.

Did you see this info about Britney? What is your opinion?

britney spears ringtone
britney spears crotch
britney spears naked
britney spears flash

Nikki Wed, Jan 3, 2007 at 03:17 PM EST

I read a post that said that Modonna should stop trying to be so controversial and that she's desperate for publicity. Well I just have to say that if your that small minded then you really have a problem. How is adoping a baby a bad thing. There are worst things a person can do, but she tries to help and make a better life for a child in need and is called desperate for publicity. Just a reminder she's Modonna and I'm sure she's not desperate for any publicity. I blame the media because they make big deals about everything even when it's good.

ceejay Wed, Jan 3, 2007 at 11:36 AM EST

I, Paris Hilton, having failed at (a) acting; (b) singing; (c) making porno movies; (d) being liked by a brain, resolve to find myself a real job and to start doing something I have never tried: make an honest living.

I, Britney Spears, having seen my coffres virtually depleted of my formerly-earned money, resolve to (a) learn how to be a good mother; (b) stop making a fool of myself in public; (c) start the process of regaining my former fame; and (d) start giving serious consideration to the men I really should marry.

I, Jessica Simpson, resolve to be real with myself and to admit that I am, (a) a lousy actress; (b) a singing has-been; (c) a "celebrity" with nothing to offer.

I......(all of the above plus others), resolve to follow the example of artists such as Bono, Brad and Angelina, Oprah, and even Madonna, who have stopped long ago thinking only of themselves, and have started to do some good in a world that needs the help.

Lastly, I, Ceejay, resolve to stop reading Slezak, so long as he continues to waste his time writing about non-entities....

Dr BLT Wed, Jan 3, 2007 at 01:56 AM EST

Jessica Simpson: Record more songs like your sister's material, something that's not so pop and a little edgier. Actually, your sister's stuff sounds just like all the rest of the alt rock. I'd suggest some fresh material, like this one:

A Future 2B Hold
Dr. BLT
words and music by Dr. BLT ©2006
http://www.drblt.net/music/future3.mp3

Maeve Tue, Jan 2, 2007 at 07:17 PM EST

I, Paris Hilton, resolve to make the world a better place by drinking Drano and dying.

Ceballos Tue, Jan 2, 2007 at 02:08 PM EST

I, M. Night Shyamalan, resolve to get my head out of my ass and not waste the considerable talent I have.

Stephanie Travitsky Tue, Jan 2, 2007 at 01:58 PM EST

BTW: for all of those Pop singers and twentie something year old starletts, would you please go to Lord and Taylor to buy age appropriate clothing instead of Babies R. Us?

Stephanie Travitsky Tue, Jan 2, 2007 at 01:54 PM EST

Well Fred, what Edie Brickel is, is what Edie Brickel is, and what Britney is, is not a singer.

fredric Tue, Jan 2, 2007 at 01:35 PM EST

Never would I think I'd ever see Edie Brickell and Britney Spears mentioned in the same article. My world is crumbling. Fast.

dma69 Tue, Jan 2, 2007 at 11:32 AM EST

Mariah Carey and Pamela Anderson: PLEASE dress in age-appropritate clothing. You both are pushing forty, not twenty.

Britney: would prefer that she go away, but if she must stick around, she should 1) study Kylie's career very closely, 2) marry a nice Jewish boy (like Christina), and 3) stay away from Paris at all costs.

Lindsay: take several nights off from clubs and parties, fire Mommy, and concentrate on your career.

Hilary: fire Mom, take acting and singing lessons, get better acting roles that don't require you to be cute and klutsy in EVERY film, and EAT SOMETHING. You look skankier than Nicole Richie (if that's even possible).

Madonna: stop trying to be controversial. You look too desperate for publicity. It's getting really old. Just put out great albums and tours. Let your work speak for itself for a change.

Nicole Richie, Kate Bosworth, Posh Spice: get a reality check or a mirror. You're too thin. Just EAT SOMETHING. ANYTHING. Just eat.

Jessica and Ashlee: again, I'd prefer that they go away, but if they must stick around, FIRE YOUR FATHER ALEADY. He's not helping your careers.

Paris: just go away. You have no talent to speak of. Just get into porn already.

Mike Tue, Jan 2, 2007 at 10:44 AM EST

I, Mary Kate Olsen, resolve to eat something in 2007...

Mike Tue, Jan 2, 2007 at 10:43 AM EST

I, Britaany Spears, resolve to only sing with my lips in 2007, instead of having the paparazzi photgraph them...

Joe C Tue, Jan 2, 2007 at 10:30 AM EST

I Mariah Carey, resolve to rule 2007 the way I did 2005 with a killer CD and other surprises! See ya darlings!

Christopher Tue, Jan 2, 2007 at 10:23 AM EST

"I, Britney Spears, resolve to follow the advice of others-- specifically, those paid to manage and handle my contact with the media and my career. But more than that, if both my mother and father agree that a course of action is best, I will follow their guidance.

I will not speak about my children or my private life publicly. I will not speak ill of my children's father or participate in any public debate about my marriage. I will retain privacy about all aspect of my personal life and no comment on rumors or gossip.

I will take voice lessons and learn to sing. I will no longer refer to 'throaty warbling' or 'baby-cooing' as singing. My next album will not contain a single voice simulating sexual gratification.

I must not tell lies. I must not spin. If I think my public will judge me harshly, I will politely but strongly refuse to answer, the way Freddy Mercury did when he was asked about his sexuality in interviews. I will do nothing to manufacture an image of myself that is untrue. I will stop denying that the video for "One More Time" was marketed towards older men. I will stop trying to maipulate the light in which you see me and just try to get myself into the best light possible when I can.

I will go for broke and trust that I'm still loved for the artificial things I once put first. I'll trust that I can gain a deeper love by playing the game straight."

Joe C Tue, Jan 2, 2007 at 10:19 AM EST

Say what you want to about Britney, I predict her CD will be a big hit this year.

GoddessLu Tue, Jan 2, 2007 at 09:38 AM EST

Repeat after me Mariah:

"I, Mariah Carey, do solemnly swear to:
1. Never again to purchase clothing from the Junior's Department--EVER. If I so much as go near a mall store with ultra low rise jeans or crotch grazing dresses, I authorize anyone so equipped to hose me down until I walk away.
2. Never again wear footgear that looks ridiculous on a 15 year old never mind a mid 30's girl. You know, those Frankenstein platform sandals. Ick.
3. Never again refer to yourself as a girl. You are a WOMAN. Be proud of that. The girls need to look up to you but how can they when you bring yourself down?
4. Keep that positive outlook on life. No matter what people say about you, even when we're hating on your outfits (and we do hate on them, rightfully so), remember that you can SING better than most.
5. Remain strong and stay in control of your own career. Your last CD worked, whatever you did. Keep it up.

Remember, no more mall clothes!

ceejay Tue, Jan 2, 2007 at 09:29 AM EST

OK. Here is my take on Brit. She has done nothing artistic in the past upteen years; she is not coming out with new material; her recent claim to fame is to start flashing reports without underwear; and she married and is dumping a loser..... remind me, Slezak, why exactly are we still talking about this woman?

kriselda jarnsaxa Mon, Jan 1, 2007 at 10:34 PM EST

Liza - Bush? Get something right? Doesn't that violate some law of physics or something?

Rush (the band, not the idiot) Evangelist Mon, Jan 1, 2007 at 10:28 PM EST

Quoting Aron - "You must remeber that it is YOUR opinion about those "well-crafted" songs, many would argue that they aren't and Madonna's are-rightfully so."

Yeah, and then there are folks like me who would argue that both of the M's write "ok" pop/dance/r&b fluff, but that if you want REALLY well-crafted songs, you should try listening to a band like Rush, who - 32 years after they released their first album, have their fans (yes, they do STILL have fans - more than most people realize - and yes, we're still FANATICALLY loyal! I think they'd probably have to do a country album to piss us off, and even then, they'd probably do it so well that we'd end up loving it regardless...) anyway, they've got their fans all in a lather trying to guess what the next one - due in the spring - will actually sound like, since ya never know with those guys! :D :D :D

jitsu Mon, Jan 1, 2007 at 09:57 PM EST

yes, britney, lindsey, paris, ashley & jessica all belong in a trailor park. they are pretty much without any talent or wits about them and that will sadly follow them for the rest of their lives. mariah had a huge voice back in the day. she has now resolved to use her big voice for hip hop and fashion shows during her concerts. a sad way to go in my opinion. finally, all of you movie/music stars that have clouded opinions about other races and such, please remember that you are in the public eye and that some form of restraint is required since you influence a huge audience via the media you inhabit.

chrissie Mon, Jan 1, 2007 at 09:53 PM EST

I, George W. Bush, resolve to bring all of the troops home, and in their place, I will send the likes of:
1. Britney Spears
2. Madonna and Mariah Carey
3. Dr. Phil
4. Terrell Owens
5. Tom Cruise
6. Anyone who currently or ever has hosted "The View"
7. The entire Simpson family (Jessica, etc.)
8. Any person who has been on the Real World
9. Geri Falwell
10. Myself, George W. Bush, since this is MY family's war and therefore MY family should be the ones taking the blows, not innocent brave soldiers!

aa Mon, Jan 1, 2007 at 09:41 PM EST

i, george michael resolve to get clean and stop cruising. i also resolve to get back in a studio or go on tour to the delight of my many many fans.

Joe Mon, Jan 1, 2007 at 08:52 PM EST

Mariah and Madonna don't really need career guidance. Both have done quite well with their recent albums. Mariah's of course was an enormous comeback. Madonna's was a moderate success in the US but a smash everywhere else--it's one of the top-selling albums of the last few years worldwide.

Also, we need to remember that the top-selling albums in the US are not selling what they used to. It's rare for albums to sell more than 2 million these days, what with iTunes, illegal downloading, CD burning, etc.

Jim Mon, Jan 1, 2007 at 07:30 PM EST

1. I, George Bush, will never again suggest that the lesson that we take away from Vietnam is "We will win if we don't quit".

2. I, Lindsay Lohan, will stop listening to the media and just make some good career choices.

3. I, Britney Spears, will seek counseling.

4. I, Rosie O'doughnut, will donate myself to be roasted over a spit to feed starving children in Africa.

5. I, Tom Cruise, will pretend to be sane, so as not to embarass the USA on both a far reaching and regular basis.

6. We, Trey Parker and Matt Stone, resolve to stop phoning it in.

7. I, Michael Jackon, resolve to stop touching little boys and sit in my neverland tree, and leave everyone the hell alone.

8. I, Sylvester Stallone, resolve to leave Rambo alone, since I already made a farce out of Rocky.

9. I, Tricia Helfer, resolve to drop that silly series and devote the remainder of my life to serve as a love slave for Jim.

Cheers!

Mark Mon, Jan 1, 2007 at 06:44 PM EST

I, Carson Daly, resolve to eat something, anything, between now and the next time I host a New Year's Eve shindig. Additionally, I resolve to be on time whenever Dennis Q. picks me up for our Manorexia meetings or Lindsay L. fetches me for Crystal Meth Anonymous. Whichever is more pressing today, it's 'just for today'. And lastly, I resolve to pay the money to hire a makeup artist to avoid my neice Jennie's further application of "crayola eyebrows" when appearing on TV

Bill Mon, Jan 1, 2007 at 05:16 PM EST

I HIllary Clinton, promise to put a gun to my head and kill myself to save the United States from my wrath.

latoia Mon, Jan 1, 2007 at 04:13 PM EST

I, Tom Cruse, will keep my mouth shut about all things not relating to films and acting as these are (at best) the only things the general public care to hear about from me. I will also stop making an ass of my self on the TV or any where else.

I, Donald Trump, will drop this vendetta I have with Rosie O’Donnell. I will realize that we are both acting like children. I will take the higher ground and not go on television and respond to any thing she says

hoho Mon, Jan 1, 2007 at 11:51 AM EST

I, Paris Hilton, resolve to make more pr0n films!

Mandy Mon, Jan 1, 2007 at 08:56 AM EST

1.) I, Jessica Simpson, will take my talentless sister, our extremely creepy dad, and my stringy-haired self back to the trailer park where we belong.

2.) I, Lindsay Lohan, will stop bitching about...well...everything. I will realize that there are many far more talented actresses, who are not crackheads and alcoholics, and that I should be thankful that I'm not turning tricks at truckstops.

3.) I, Nicole Richie, will eat something that is not laced with opium, and I will not throw up afterwards.

4.) I, Paris Hilton, will take that ridiculous "I-have-more-money-than-God-even-though-I-don't-do-a-damned-thing" simper off my face, and act and dress like the grown woman I am.

jay Mon, Jan 1, 2007 at 03:48 AM EST

Mark, it's completely pointless to compare Mariah and Madonna, like apples and oranges, but in Mariah's defense, she DOES STILL SING. There is no question that she's still a phenomenal vocalist. We Belong Together was almost entirely full voice in her lower register. Plus, I saw her in concert at MSG and she tore it up with "Vision of Love" & "Fly Like a Bird," two songs that confirm what a powerhouse she is. In fact, almost all the songs that she sang at the concert was full voice (which she needed to do to fill up such a huge space) even if the recording was her falsetto.

mark Mon, Jan 1, 2007 at 02:50 AM EST

anna, i think you are way off base. Mariah Carey does not sing anymore, it is whispers and shrieks. I think she has a great voice, but let's face, she has been hurting since dumping Tommy Matolla. Madonna hasn't been as revolutionary as she was back in the day, but her songs are classic and a lot of them genius. Mariah's have been much more disposable. Mariah does have a better voice, but her shows aren't just about her singing.

Jen Sun, Dec 31, 2006 at 05:07 PM EST

I, Lindsay Lohan, resolve to do everything suggested by Martha below. Additionally, I resolve to buy a dictionary and learn both the meaning and correct spelling of the word "adequate."

Liza Sun, Dec 31, 2006 at 03:53 PM EST

I, George W Bush, promise to choke on a pretzel again, but this time, I'll get it right.

Jimmy Sun, Dec 31, 2006 at 03:48 PM EST

Thumbs up, Eric. Katharine will not disappoint us.

Eric Sun, Dec 31, 2006 at 11:55 AM EST

I, Katharine McPhee, resolve to make a decent debut album. It will spawn singles that will be played on the radio and I then will join an elite club that right now, only includes Kelly Clarkson, Carrie Underwood, and Daughtry. I will prove that it was not some fluke that I ended up in the top two and that I should have beaten Taylor Hicks. I also, resolve not to mention my bulimia while promoting my album, because I've beaten that dead horse. I will prove Slezak wrong for all the malicious, bitchy things he's said about me.

aron Sun, Dec 31, 2006 at 09:55 AM EST

Well, Anna, have you considered that it's nearly impossible to broaden your fan base everytime you put out an album? Yes, you claim new fans, but in the process lose them too. Just because you sell 5 million records one year, does not mean you will sell the same or more records the next year. Madonna's album was very well-received by fans, non fans and critics last year-considering it was a dance-based album. You can't call that mediocre. Just because Charmbracelet sold little, does not make it a crap album because Mimi sold many more. This makes no sense. Sales are important(to the artist and record label), but not the be all and end all. Plus it's all luck, timing and marketing
anyway.

You must remeber that it is YOUR opinion about those "well-crafted" songs, many would argue that they aren't and Madonna's are-rightfully so. This is just a matter of opinion and arguing about it is pointless.

Also, can I point out that there really is no point in comparing Madonna and Mariah! They are two totally different artists, who just because they are female are put up against each other. This does not happen between male artists-why? It really is a pointless argument. Hopefully this will put an end to this "battle" once and for all.

morgan Sun, Dec 31, 2006 at 04:55 AM EST

I, Nicole Kidman, resolve to visit my two children three times a year, if possible. If not, I resolve to have their photographs sent to me annually, so that I will remember what they look like.

Jonathan Sun, Dec 31, 2006 at 02:33 AM EST

Anna, you're wrong. I'm 17 and became a hardcore fan of Madonna after American Life. I absolutely love COAD because it's not more of that boring rnb featuring whoever is hot at the moment. You should go to the fan forums so you can see how many young fans madonna got. lol

BilliamE Sun, Dec 31, 2006 at 01:52 AM EST

I'm glad Slezak mentioned one of my favorite artists, Aaliyah. She was so lovely. Also, am I the only one here that likes Madonna, Mariah and Fergie (...even Britney sometimes...)?

Anna Sat, Dec 30, 2006 at 11:24 PM EST

The hostility on this board is hilarious! Milo, take it easy, I didn't personally assult your mother. Madonna is making mediocre records and people aren't responding the way they used to. Deal with it. Calling ME fat and ugly, etc. isn't gonna change anyone's minds, nor will it motivate Madge to make better MUSIC or more interesting music videos (a current problem that Michael Slezak has covered numerous times).

Furthermore, Anna (ha!) brought Mariah Carey out into the open, but if you line up The Emancipation of Mimi and Confessions on a Dancefloor, you will see that Mariah ultimately created a bunch of emotionally resonant, well crafted and expertly sung songs. Madonna did no such thing, which is enough to maintain her fanbase (i.e. you crazy people), but not really broaden her audience the way she used to. Maybe that's what she wants. If so, good for her. But geeze, this woman is not perfect, and she's certainly not the most exemplary artist we have today.

Reichen Sat, Dec 30, 2006 at 09:30 PM EST

Anna, sweetie...I know we weren't talking about Robbie Williams...you made a statement (which I quoted), I made a rebuttal. I don't think he needs to give up his left nut to hit his US fans...thanks to iTunes.

Madonna is not hurting...she has a strong core base of US fans who are willing to support her through all of her endeavors. She's much more popular abroad, that's it...Pink is experiencing the same exact thing - especially in Australia.

Anna Sat, Dec 30, 2006 at 08:23 PM EST

I, Anna of EW popwatch fame (not talented for much else, sorry y'all), hereby resolve to stop trolling around entertainment blogs with the sole intent of hurling insults and vicious fabrications about artists I very much envy. I wish I were as strong a woman as Madonna to go after my dreams, have enough determination and chutzpah to defiantly go against the grain of what most expect or want from me as a woman in a male dominated world and the entertainment business.

I hereby resolve to push myself away from my computer monitor and the box of ho-hos so I can start a singing career, start and manage a lucrative and fairly successful recording and production company, read scripts for movies even if I turn out to be a mediocre actress, juggle being a mom, a wife, a popstar, a children's books author, a song writer, an artistic visionary... did I forget anything?? oh yeah, soon to design my own limited line of clothing with a global clothing chain and hopefully make my movie directorial debut in the near future.

milo Sat, Dec 30, 2006 at 05:02 PM EST

Ok before anything, Slezak, your mother always told you to keep a pair of panties just in case?? do we need to discuss?
onto the post itself and the fact that yet again it turned into a madonna/mariah fans battle.
Anna sweetie with nothing else in life to do: I'm a fan of both and even I know Mariah is been writing the same song year after year and will never be able to come close to touch Madonna's artistry. Look it up Confessions have sold more copies worldwide than Mimi.
Madonna doesn't need nor does she cares what you or any of us really think of her and her music and will do whatever the hell she damn pleases and that's why we love her and has been on top and will remain on tops until she damn decides to retired.
now get a life and find some slub to make out with during new years eve and fall on your drunk ass.

everyone else, Happy New Year!

shelby Sat, Dec 30, 2006 at 02:09 PM EST

Anna: I really don't feel the need to defend Madonna, because her accomplishments and her amazing career speak for themself. However, I do have to point out that, and this is where you and I have to learn to disagree, the whole reason Madonna is who she is is because she takes risks, creates trends (not follows them) in music amongst other arenas, and follows her artistic integrity.

To say that she would fail to make a good r/b album with lots of rapper interludes a la everyone else, is wrong. Firstly, because she already did that(not fresh territory), and much better, with both Erotica and more so with Bedtime Stories. She(rightly) will not go down that route because it is all you hear on US radio and she is way ahead of that trend as usual. Secondly, as ambitious and hungry she is (like every artist out there) for commercial success, she will not sell-out and do something just for chart positions and money. I disagree that she wants commercial success more than art, because that is exactly the opposite of what she stands for and why millions of people around the world love her for. Again, she would love to have both commercial and artistic success-but it comes and goes for all singers, actors, etc. To say that she only wants commercial and chart success is ignorant, because why else would she make an album of just dance music, when she knows perfectly well that Americans don't get/like it very much and radio does not play those types of music on a large scale?

When you reach that level of global success, you must definitely think of profits, but it shouldn't drive you-otherwise you are not being an artist. I'm not saying that she could go and make an amazing r/b-ish album and sell millions (although i really do think she can!), but can can definitely, for sure get anyone she wants to produce it a la Gwen, Britney, Mariah, Fergie, Nelly Furtado, etc. Ultimately, sales figures go down with age and that is a fact of the music industry-so singers in their late 30's should keep that in mind-unless you go into adult comtemporary hell.

Stephanie Travitsky Sat, Dec 30, 2006 at 12:08 PM EST

1. I, Britney Spears resolve to ditch the Pretty Woman prostitute get-ups including the wide necked, short dresses that show way too much of my turkey stuffed boobs, and try to wear clothes that are a lot more flattering and a lot more tasteful. Just because my music career is in the trash heap, does not mean my maturity is too.

2. I, Nicole Ritchie vow to eat pleanty of Hostess cupcakes and In and Out burgers so that I can get back to my normal weight of 130.

3. I, Donald Trump will ditch the Peppermint Patty hair-do and go au natural.

Jenny Sat, Dec 30, 2006 at 12:07 PM EST

I, Barbara Walters, resolve to hire a non-Caucasian host for The View before summer. I will make sure that she is strong, intelligent, and respectful. Above all, when I seat her next to Rosie O’Donnell, she will not look like Rosie will eat her as a snack, as it looks like most of the time with that blonde one.

Additionally, I promise to either make sure the blonde one learns to articulate her argument better instead of whining her way through an argument. Better yet, replace her with another non-Caucasian, so at least there’ll be two Caucasians and two non-Caucasians, because viewers of The View don’t all live in the Upper East Side of Manhattan.

Jenny Sat, Dec 30, 2006 at 11:57 AM EST

I, Rosie O’Donnell, resolve to in 2007 to not be a hypocrite. I will still stand by my convictions and campaign for equal rights for the LGBT community; however I will not pull another stunt like I did with Kelly Ripa, where I cried wolf and called homophobia when there wasn’t, and in the process tried to out Clay Aiken.

In addition, I promise when I unintentionally offend a minority group that I’m not a part of, I’ll to be more sensitive to them and offer an actual, gracious apology, instead of having my publicist issue a statement hoping the group will “one day will be able to grasp my [sic] humor” and follow that with an on-air apology that’s dripping with condescension.

After all, how can people respect me and my campaign for the LGBT community when I do not respect other groups?

colbyfan Sat, Dec 30, 2006 at 11:24 AM EST

I Clay Aiken will release an album of pop music that carries forward what I was starting to do with Invisible and I will tour with it. I will stop saying that I would be just as happy out of the music business, stop hiding out from the mean old Clay haters who seized upon my 'maybe gay' pix like they were Suri Cruise photos, and I will ask my powerful friends in the music business for some good advise on navigating a long career with a rabid fan base like mine( you know who you are Elton, Barry & Neil). I will continue to do television appearances to keep my fans happy and next time I will punch Kelly Ripa in the face. Oh, and I will continue to stay far, far away from Rosie O'Donnell.

Norbert Sat, Dec 30, 2006 at 11:16 AM EST

I, Axel Rose, will promise to do the following in 2007.
1. FINISH MY ALBUM, (Chinese Democracy, for those of you who haven't heard the promised almbum title over the past decade)
2. Revisit my plastic surgeon and try to restore my original face- cause I somehow wound up looking like Clay Aiken- or Clay Aiken now loks like me...either way
3. Beg Izzy to come back- Cause GnR just aint GNR without Izzy.
4. Stop acting like a spoiled fourteen year old and honour all dates tours, contracts etc.

Anna Sat, Dec 30, 2006 at 10:44 AM EST

Reichen, honey!

We're not talking about Robbie Williams. We're talking about "the legend" Madonna here! If an artist like her is as successful and legendary as you say she is, shouldn't she be able to reach Americans? Plus, Robbie Williams would give up his left nut to be able to be a huge star in America. He's tried!

Shelby, sweetie!

I disagree completely that Madonna could just call up Timbaland and make an R&B hit and be back on top of the charts again. Because if she really could do that, she would have done it already. That's how ambitious she is and how much commercial success is important to her. She hasn't done that because she knows that it probably wouldn't be well recieved because she doesn't have as much to contribute to the R&B field. So she'd rather make a marginally successful dance-pop album than a risky hip-hip r&b album that would touch on any really fresh territory for her. Because, once again, the commercial success is more important to her than the art. And her art is suffering for it, and her sales are suffering for it, no question.

cheryl Sat, Dec 30, 2006 at 09:32 AM EST

Madonna - respected - same sentence -hmmmmm.......

shelby Sat, Dec 30, 2006 at 09:09 AM EST

Anna honey, Madonna can charge a bundle for years to come on tour, because she is a legend and is respected around the world for everything she has achieved. Anyone can stand on stage and sing, albeit with a good voice. She, on the other hand, is the only artist today who can do the whole package so well, so she has to charge a lot for tickets. Although, no one mentions that Barbra Streisand charges more for her concerts.

Also, to "connect with a US market" you have to do r/b, hip hop music today, so she stays away from the rest of the pack, as usual, and does her own thing. You don't think she can contact Jermaine Dupri or Timbaland and make a good album, and release songs that are played on both pop and r/b stations, to boost her singles to the top of the charts?? She can, but refuses to-she's been down that road in the early nineties and won't go there again. Also, every artist out there is calculating, to say they aren't is naive. So it's all relative.

Chuck Sat, Dec 30, 2006 at 08:51 AM EST

I, Whitney Houston, resolve in 2007 to work with Clive Davis and finish my comeback album. It will be more successful than any of my previous albums and I will prove to my daughter, my family and most importantly to myself that I can stand on my own without the help of any man or any drug. My new drug of choice will be my respect and the love of my fans. I will be a beacon for Love and Grace and I will be the light and the voice that God has granted me to be.

Anna C Sat, Dec 30, 2006 at 07:39 AM EST

Whatever, Perez is awesome! I could care less that he steals from the lame ass paparazzi... or what he looks like. He's always the first to report juicy celeb news... and I find him funny most of the time.

Reichen Sat, Dec 30, 2006 at 06:32 AM EST

Anna wrote:

"But if you can't connect with a US audience (which she [Madonna] can't), there is seriously a problem."

Anna, sweetie...musicians can be wildly successful around the world without cracking the US market. Robbie Williams???

Anyway...

In 2007, I, Perez Hilton, resolve to give credit where credit is due by appropriately citing the sources of the photos used on my blog. Furthermore, I resolve to cease and decist with the lynch mobs I carried on earlier this year to drag celebrities (psuedo or otherwise) out of the closet. Next, I resolve to attend Jenny Craig meetings on a weekly basis to try and lose the spare tire I received from devouring the pastry case at the Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf. Finally, I resolve to hire a stylist in an effort to avoid the many, MANY fashion crimes I committed this year.

Chris Newman Sat, Dec 30, 2006 at 05:56 AM EST

I, Uwe Boll, will stop beating up every film critic that trashed my movies, but instead try to make better films not based on video games. I also hope to get a sense of humor.

Impossible06 Sat, Dec 30, 2006 at 03:25 AM EST

I, Janet Jackson, fully aware of all my talents and abilities resolve to stop polluting the music industry with subpar albums. I will come to terms with the fact that I am no longer at the top of my game like I used to be. I realize that I was once a icon of music and entertainment, but like all great people and all great things, I have come to the end of the road. Instead of bowing out like a champion a few years back with my "All For You" album which came in at number one with many hundeds of thousands of albums sold. I came back not once but twice, only to receive poor reception from the public and most of my fans. Not to mention that horrid superbowl incident. I will use what talents I have left such as my eye for hits, my killer dance moves, my reasonable good acting skills, and my amazing producer boyfriend to help create and develop the careers of aspiring singers in the world. I will open up my own music studio or atleast hold some kind of competition for the next star. I will give them a huge break. Sharing with them all of my know how and years of industry knowledge. I will not hold my head low becuz I did some rather amazing things in my day. I will realize that just becuz I am no longer relevant with todays crowd, that I was once a stellar artist. And if I am to put out another album, I will not promote it as if the world is ending any day now.

Anna Sat, Dec 30, 2006 at 03:14 AM EST

Erick,

Madonna has built her tours off of a huge spectacle. Not her music. You think if she took all the flash away and just performed Confessions alone, the tour would have been so successful? Nah, didn't think so. Plus, Madonna charges about a million dollars per ticket so she makes a killing as much off of ticket prices as attendence. And I'm not trying to pass off "boring" as a fact. Yeah, it's my opinion, but I'm certainly not alone. And I understand what you're trying to say about the world market, and yes it's important to have a global following and Madonna does yada yada yada. But if you can't connect with a US audience (which she can't), there is seriously a problem. And I think that maybe once Madonna stops making monotonous "dance" records that are more calculation than art, she'll strike more of a chord in America.

Happy New Year! (yeah, I want that to sound condescending. the least I can do to top this off, right?)

Jackson Sat, Dec 30, 2006 at 12:39 AM EST

I, Britney Spears, resolve to not getting married at all this year. Ross from Friends will not be my roll model. I will fire my manager, because, honestly, Felicia is not exactly pushing me or helping to improve my grammar. I also resolve to never hang out with Paris Hilton again, and will find new friends, preferably someone who is not on the cover of Us Weekly. I will continue to lose weight, and will get a breast reduction. I will find clothing that fits me, and also will never wear Uggs again after they have been out of style for 5 years now. I will decide on a hair color, and I will, finally, focus on my music. Nothing else, except for my kids perhaps. My kids and my music.

Erick Fri, Dec 29, 2006 at 11:26 PM EST

Anna | Dec 29, 2006 7:31:16 PM

Um, Anna.. just because you found something "boring" doesn't make it so. Most people in the U.S. didn't care for Confessions On a Dancefloor but then again, the world isn't made up of the U.S. alone, is it? Sure, it may be the largest single market but it certainly is not THE only one or the most important one. As a business person, you'd want your product to be successful globally not just locally; in this aspect, Madonna's album was extremely successful. It is then also obvious that your statement regarding her album being "boring" is more a personal opinion than actual fact. One has to question how can a "boring" album be so successful. If you'd like to get even more intrigued, perhaps we should then discuss how a tour mostly based on a "boring" album went on to become the best selling tour for a female artist of all time. Whoa! Mind boggling, isn't it?!

Happy Holidays!

BJohnson Fri, Dec 29, 2006 at 10:23 PM EST

Because I love him soo much....
I, Mel Gibson, resolve to keep my mouth shut for 2007. There is no movie I need to make now that Apocolypto is done. There is no tv interview left to do, by now you either love me or hate me and move on. I do not need to comment on any other celeb and their mouth or their problems. Even though I gave away my daughter in 2006, I still have other kids left to raise and I think I need to take this time to reconnect and make up to my family for the embarrassment I've caused them. Finally, I will use some of the money I've made from my lucrative career, and hire a personal driver. I'll even make sure he's white so not to give the press anymore ammunition to put me in the news. See you in 2008!

Anna Fri, Dec 29, 2006 at 09:38 PM EST

Aron,
My point is that Mariah Carey (yes, a "star") is in no need of any career help from you. That's why she's singing the songs and not on the message boards.

bma Fri, Dec 29, 2006 at 09:26 PM EST

I, Madonna, resolve to make the funnest, most radio-friendly pop/dance/hip-hop album of all time. I was doing hip-hop/r&b flavored albums (Bedtime Story) back in the day, so you can't say I'm jumping on any bandwagon.

I will promote heavily my album and singles, and will make creative videos for all of them.

Most importantly, I will have the number 1 album and single when I am inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in 2008!

Oh, and I will not, ever, wear that damn purple leotard again.

Me Fri, Dec 29, 2006 at 08:27 PM EST

I think if Britney teamed up with William Orbit or Mirwais (sp?), the guys who helped Madonna make Ray of Light and Music, it would be incredible.

Jen Fri, Dec 29, 2006 at 07:57 PM EST

Jael ... OMG! I can't believe that you typed EXACTLY what I was thinking!! Fergie needs a whole new makeover ... and by makeover, I mean to end her "solo career". The Peas were clearly NOT holding her back ... they were keeping her sane! I miss the good ol' days when we didn't see every square inch of her!

Victor Perez Fri, Dec 29, 2006 at 07:45 PM EST

Happy New Qu- uh, i mean, Year,, Slezak!! You can butter me up anytime!! xox

Slammy Fri, Dec 29, 2006 at 07:44 PM EST

I, Saddam Hussein...(sound of trapdoor falling)

aron Fri, Dec 29, 2006 at 07:43 PM EST

No Anna, She is just misguided! It is NOT appropriate to use the term "star" when referring to Mariah.

Anna Fri, Dec 29, 2006 at 07:31 PM EST

woah, aron, Mariah is no misguided star. You wanna go? How bout Madonna-- "I will stop making crappy, boring albums like "Confessions on a Dancefloor" and refrain from picking up kids on my next shopping tr--I mean, charity trip to africa."

CBS Fri, Dec 29, 2006 at 07:30 PM EST

Hi, I'm CBS. Though I've unfortunately already committed to the celebs-as-cops reality show, I vow that we will never greenlight such a piece of trash again (you would think that "Tuesday Night Book Club" would have taught me a lesson). I also will do everything in my power to ensure that "Big Brother" dies. I thought airing it three times a week would be too much for viewers and be enough, but obviously other options must be pursued. I will, however, remain committed to classier fare like the Emmy-winning "Amazing Race."

aron Fri, Dec 29, 2006 at 07:27 PM EST

In 2007, I, Gwen Stefani, will make sing a good song that isn't based on a musical w/yodelling, wear less make up, stop bleaching my hair, stop trying to be so different, when what i really want to do is be even more like Madonna.

In 2007, I, Jessica Simpson, will leave the entertainment business, beacause I can't perform live, can't make a decent album, can't make a decent movie probably because I can't act.

In 2007, I, Mooriah Carey, will go on a diet, wear way more clothes, stop believing that I am Marilyn Monroe (because I am the last person who should think that), stop covering up that I have many, many lovers (Eminem, cough), will drop the lawsuit against Mary Carey (porn star), because I am not one to talk-pot and kettle?(no wonder she thinks ther will be confusion between them), and I will go back into oblivion after my next album flops, even when I add more songs to it and release it 12 times to milk it dry, so I can get another boob job. Okay, and I'm done!

Martha Fri, Dec 29, 2006 at 07:08 PM EST

Another easy target, but I can't resist:

I, Lindsay Lohan, resolve to get my life back on track in 2007. If I have a substance problem, I resolve to really deal with it and not just make enigmatic statements to the press. I resolve to use my impressive acting talent for good (more movies like Prairie Home Companion, Mean Girls, etc.) and not for evil (parading around in barely female parts-covering clothing at various nightclubs). And I resolve to cut ties with my toxic parents and start forming some decent friendships.

Come on, girl, you can do it! Don't flush it all down the ter-let!

Jael Fri, Dec 29, 2006 at 07:03 PM EST

In 2007, I, Fergie, will acknowledge that I am merely the plastic version of greater pop stars. In contrition, I will stick with the other Peas and no longer flood the radio with crimes against the English language and English landmarks. And I'm sorry to the Dutch too. Totally didn't know about you guys. On the video front, I will stop humping everything I can.

And just for kicks, I will try to dress like normal adult women instead of a perv's naughty girl fantasy. I have seen the error that is loud patterns, tiny hats, random belts, cropped shirts and formal shorts. Now, if someone could just get me Stella McCartney's number.

daisyj Fri, Dec 29, 2006 at 06:47 PM EST

I, M. Night Shyamalan, hereby resolve to get the hell over myself and realize that being a film genuis does not mean that every idea I have is a good one. I further resolve to try working from a script written by someone else for a change, in order that I may be more willing to change things that aren't working, before I turn into George Lucas without the media empire.

Joe Fri, Dec 29, 2006 at 06:34 PM EST

I think Britney could do something cool if she puts her mind to it. I think she'd be really big in the dance circut cause as club hopper (gay clubs anyways) I can remember how it used to be when on of her songs would be blaring out of the speakers and how crazy people would get on the dance floor. I think a producer who would be good for her even though he's already worked with some people is Stuart Price the guy behind Madonna's Confessions on a Dance Floor Album. I think he and her could really do a awesome Disco/dance album and I think it would be if not a Commercial hit at least a club/play it just to get her Career back on track. As far as unknown song writers or underrated songwriter producers I would go with maybe some up and coming Dj I hope she don't do the whole hip hop/rthymic pop thing its so over done and back fires a lot of times. (LOOK AT HER PARTY BUDDY PARIS HILTON) I'll probably buy her new cd just cause i've been a fan since I seen her on TRL in January of 1999. I hope she comes back cause as we gay boys all know we love our pop divas and I'm feeling a Mariah-Like comeback is possibly in the works who knows.....