'Golden Girls': Spasibo for being a friend!

We can’t stop thinking about that Variety story last month about a new Russian reimagining of The Golden Girls. In their version, the 50-something Grownup Girls live in a Russian country house, not exactly partying in the city where the heat is on, like our Miami mavens. Two of the friends are divorcees, two are widows, and their personalities are supposedly based on the original characters, so it’s safe to say there will be some man trouble. But can there be a Rose without St. Olaf? A Sophia without “Picture it: Sicily, 1919…”? We’ll have to see a tape to decide. No, really, send us a tape.

In the meantime, may we suggest an episode in which Dorothy rallies Blanche and Rose to organize a voter-registration drive in their village (pictured)? Things go awry when Sophia (at rear) mistakes the ballot box for black-market plutonium, and trades it for a loaf of bread.

(No word on a Russian remake of Golden Palace, which is probably a good thing. Can any Russian actor match Don Cheadle -- or, more importantly, Cheech Marin? So many questions, questions to mull over while eating cheesecake. Wait, do they even have cheesecake in Russia?)