For you, sirs? It’s free. No, take it. Someone please take the hideous butler dog. Last night’s episode of Modern Family, “Not in My Home,” revolved around household anomalies treasured by one party and reviled by others: Barkley the Dog Butler at Jay and Gloria’s, a nudie pic promoting agribusiness at Phil and Claire’s, and a troubled gardener at Mitchell and Cam’s. As usual, hilarious dialogue abounded but my favorite parts were the sweet bonding moments among the family — you know, when they bitch and moan (to our delight) for nearly half the scene before realizing how alike they sound and how maybe their respective relationships aren’t so bad after all. I loved the heart-to-heart Claire and Mitchell shared over an invigorating beaded comb sheath crafting session at Luke’s birthday party, for example. Anyway, this time, it was Jay and Mitchell who decided to focus on how good they had it with their unlikely spouses. “Just drop it, kid,” Jay told his son. “We’re both with people different from us, and that’s gonna create stuff. But you want different.” Awwww! These stop-and-think moments resonate with me the most, even if we’ve heard them before. But it’s not like you wanna go around quoting THAT all day, so after the jump, I’ve listed some of last night’s best lines. If I missed your favorite, beam it up to the dirty old Internet “like a torpedo” in the comments! (Read full post)
In the mess of morning news was this weird little gem: 
It’s one thing to exhibit slight amusement over the popular Facebook quiz "Which Muppet Are You?" but quite another to truly commit to that puppet’s persona via basic photo-editing tools and a general dearth of shame. So I sent out a prompt — 
