'The Originals' react: I put a spell on you

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Image Credit: Bob Mahoney/The CW

Spoiler alert: If you haven’t watched the Feb. 4 episode of The Originals, stop reading now (or be cursed)!

So do you all remember how last week I was all “Papa Tunde is the biggest badass this show has ever seen,” and so on and so forth? I take it all back. Every single word. Because right now, Celeste and her two ginger sidekicks are taking over New Orleans, and I cannot get enough of all this creepy witch stuff. Also, girl power!

This week, things started inside a tomb — which hit way too close to home for TVD fans – where Monique Deveraux was suddenly alive. How? Well, Papa Tunde died, which brought her back to life. And there’s your loophole, Marcel! Kill the witch that replaced Davina in the harvest, and she will be back. Although, do we think that witch is Celeste? Because she was around before the harvest. But who else could it be? Color me confused.

Meanwhile, at the reopening of the church, it was all about the evil power of the New Orleans gingers! For starters, we witnessed our first hex of the episode when ginger number two — Bastiana — “marked” Kieran, a.k.a. he will now lose his mind the same way Cami’s brother did. As for ginger number one, Marcel recognized her as Genevieve, a witch who apparently knows Rebekah and Marcel’s secret about bringing Mikael to town all those years ago. Bekah told Marcel — in his beautifully fitted taupe hoodie — to finish things “like we did last time.” Then she headed upstairs to squash her quarrel with Elijah, who was rocking what might be his prettiest blazer to date. The Original sister agreed to take Hayley away to the plantation house to keep her safe.

Plot twist: Hayley wanted to throw a kegger! Tonight was the full moon and even though Hayley can’t turn when she’s pregnant (explanation!), her family was finally going to be human. She hung up some clothes for them — an interesting start to a party — and waited around until the not-so-hairy beasts started showing up. First up, we met Oliver, who immediately took Rebekah for a spin on the dance floor. Then, in the other corner, stood a brunette version of Oliver who looked a lot like a manlier Dan Humphrey to me. Everyone, meet Jackson, Hayley’s betrothed! Yes, you read that right. He and Hayley are from the first two werewolf families — not related! — and they were supposed to be married. I don’t know about you all, but I’m liking this one, and I was a little bummed that he wasn’t Hayley’s baby daddy. Can you imagine that hair and eye combo on a child? It wouldn’t have been fair.

So while Hayley and Rekebah partied, Klaus unsuccessfully tried to save Kieran from his hex, and Elijah showed us once again why he’s so freakin’ sexy. He had put the puzzle pieces together. He knew Sabine was really Celeste. That being said, he’s only as smart as a man in love, which means we can’t blame him for what happened next: Celeste poisoned him with a kiss. (Don’t get me started on how much I love the fairytale undertones of that one!) She told him that his “always and forever” bond with his family was his greatest mistake. She was going to teach him the error of his ways. Klaus, Hayley, and Rebekah were all in danger … and he had to choose which one to save.

Behind door number one was Klaus. After stealing Monique to use as leverage to get to Bastiana, Klaus and Marcel got into a fight in the street over not hurting children or whatever. And once Klaus finished performing the slowest neck snap in television history, Sophie surprised him by putting Papa Tunde’s knife in his chest. Then the knife moved all the way into his body. On. its. own. I’m sorry, but whaaa?! He fell to the ground, unconscious.

Behind door number two was dear Rebekah, who was lured out of the woods by Oliver. In my head I started singing “Oliver and Rebekah up against a tree. K.I.S.S.I.N.G.” before I realized how annoying I was. Thankfully, I snapped out of it when the wolves showed up. Surrounded by a bunch of growling beasts, it seemed Bekah was in a bit of a — wait for it –¬†hairy situation. And just like that, I annoyed myself again. (New entry: Behind door number four, Elijah can save me from myself!)

Door number three was hotter than the rest … literally. Hayley and her fellow royal, Jackson, were trapped in the house as the witches made it catch fire. So who did Elijah save?! And the verdict is — drumroll please! — Hayley (and then Jackson)! Elijah pulled them both from the fire (which can’t kill him) before running into Celeste in the woods. Let’s just say that the lovebirds didn’t quite make up.

So while the witches of the French Quarter were busy rising again — like the South? — Elijah headed home to find Marcel. Was that the first time we’ve heard Elijah really yell at someone? He’s always so calm. Either way, I loved it! My man was pissed with a capital “P.” He threw around some vamps just for the heck of it before informing Marcel that the witches had Rebekah in addition to Klaus. Just like that, the sexy dream (in taupe) is back! And as Elijah put it, he’s going to catch kill em all!

In the episode’s final moments, Sophie wanted to leave town after having stabbed Klaus, but Monique took her fear for disbelief. And if you don’t keep the faith in this town, you bleed out from your nose, your eyes, and just about anywhere else in the general vicinity of your face. So after all that trouble Sophie went through to bring her niece back, little Monique killed her. Damn, these witches are mad. Hell hath no fury like a (magical) woman scorned, amirite?

So what did you all think of the episode? Were you sad to see Sophie go? Are these witches unstoppable? Will Elijah really be able to kill Celeste? How hot was Jackson? And I’m taking a vote: Was that Elijah’s best blazer of all time? Sound off in the comments below!

QUOTABLES

“Can I get you anything, brother? A magnifying glass? A pipe, perhaps?” -Klaus to an investigative Elijah

“It’s a rather large and ominous chicken, wouldn’t you say?” -Elijah when Marcel compared Papa Tunde’s dead body to the chickens witches used to leave on doorsteps

“You poisoned me with a kiss. At least you haven’t lost your sense of irony.” -Elijah to Celeste

“A vampire is trying to reverse a witch’s hex placed on you, and it’s the cup you find sacrilegious.” -Klaus to Kieran


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