'Cougar Town': Talk about the season 5 premiere!

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Image Credit: Darren Michaels/TBS

After a way-too-long hiatus, our favorite cul-de-sac crew is back for a fifth season. And this week’s title card stated what everyone was already thinking: “Season Five? Didn’t see that coming.” But the little show that could is still going strong, and I’ll gladly pound some grape to that!

The premiere episode, “All or Nothin,'” picked up where season 4 left off. The gang returned from their vacation to L.A., and Travis and Laurie reveled in their newfound romantic relationship. Unfortunately, the rest of the group wasn’t too keen on the new pairing. “It’s a complex range of emotions that can’t be expressed by mere words. I invented a sound to capture it: awwwblecch.” Yeah, Ellie, that’s pretty accurate.

Jules had the hardest time dealing with her son and BFF getting it on, and matters were only made worse when she walked in on Travis and Laurie showering together. Body parts were seen and touched. No one came away unscathed. The unfortunate shower incident inspired Jules to become truly comfortable with Travis and Laurie as a couple, which was a lot easier said than done. Case in point? Her awkward high fives and inability to control the volume of her voice.

I kind of like Travis and Laurie together, but here are some words of wisdom from Grayson to sum up how everyone else is feeling: “I mean, it’s really weird seeing them together. But then again, after such a long buildup, I guess we gotta let ‘em play it out for a while.” At the end of the day, Jules decided that it would be best to just deal with Travis and Laurie — even if that meant walking in on them in compromising, um, positions, which she did again before episode’s end.

In other news, Bobby came into some money from the success of overseas Penny Can revenues. Grayson wanted Bobby to spend the cash paying off his bar tab, but instead Bobby bought a new/used hot tub. In the end, the two bros hugged it out and shared some hot-tubbing time. Meanwhile, Andy was paying the price for letting Stan watch A Nightmare on Elm Street. (I’m pretty sure the kid playing Stan is a new actor again. Old habits die hard.) Anyway, Andy and Bobby concocted a plan to gruesomely “murder” Freddy Krueger in front of Stan, with help from Tom. Ellie shot down this idea and came up with one that would be less emotionally scaring: Tom dressed up as Freddy and told Stand he had to move to Canada because Florida’s too expensive. Being a grown up is hard! Even for Freddy.

Best lines and moments from the season 5 premiere:

++ “Scissors for hands? Good luck with that, Edward.” —Jules, a now self-proclaimed movieslut

++ “So much skin! A pale and tan swirl.” —Jules, after walking in on Travis and Laurie showering together

++ “You know what’s so amazing? That this is the first time one of us has walked in on Jellybean getting jellyrolled.” —Ellie

++ “Naked, Sexy, Touchy, Grabby” the name of a sure-to-be-popular dance song, according to Jules

++ Grayson’s beer-amid, a pyramid made out of beer cans

++ “I don’t know exactly what’s going on, but this feels a little ambush-y. And I’m not talking about the nickname that my friend Amber named her lady poof.” —Laurie

What did you think of the season 5 premiere? Do you like Travis and Laurie together as a couple? And really, is there anything Big Tippi can’t fix? I found the season opener to be a little underwhelming, but I’m excited about things to come. (There’s a Monica and Chandler reunion coming. Could I be any more excited? Answer: No.) Sound off with all your thoughts in the comments.


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