On the high heels of an alleged Vogue ouster, Miley Cyrus is the October cover girl of Harper’s Bazaar. Though it’s similar to most high fashion shoots, the cover is a bit unsettling. Here, we see Cyrus in rare buttoned-up form, looking refined in an icy blond Sharon Stone vein, nary a dangling tongue nor spiked hair tip in sight. Is it just me, or is it frightening seeing Cyrus with her mouth almost-closed?
But then she opens up in Editor at Large Derek Blasberg’s profile, quickly going back to shock-jock form. What’s surprising about her interview is that she says nothing unsurprising. She gives Blasberg line after quotable line, asserting that she is, in fact, an adult and the architect of her whole cropped-cut-perma-twerking persona. It’s almost as if she’s verbally (and, unfortunately, visually) dictating the Miley Manifesto — the world is her foam finger, and we’re just watching at home via GIF.
Here are seven of her craziest quotes from the interview:
On her Mary Poppins-like prop bag of Versace necklaces, stilettos, and gold chains: “I never know when I’m going to be like, ‘Photo shoot!’ And need some weird stuff to whip out.” (You mean like that poor, sullied little American icon known as the foam finger?)
After Hannah Montana ended, girlfriend needed a break: “I was an adult when I was supposed to be a kid. So now I’m an adult and I’m acting like a kid. There are times when I’m sitting in my big ole house and I’m like, ‘I can’t believe I’m allowed to be here alone.'”
Her advice to Justin Bieber: “I’m not saying you need to take a break because you’re crazy. I’m saying you need to take a break so you can be crazy, and people aren’t going to judge you. You’re going to do dumb stuff from here on out. But do it in your own time. Do it safely. You can afford to protect yourself and still have fun.”
On her “We Can’t Stop” video: “I told my label: ‘This is the first time I’m showing you what I’m bringing to the table as an artist. If this goes wrong, you never have to trust me again. I’ll be your little puppet. But if I’m right, then you know I’m on to something.'”
On her twerking target audience: “There is no girl out there speaking on behalf of the country girls who are turnt up.”
On her “We Can’t Stop” styling: “I feel like every girl is trying to have a beauty shot and prove that they’re ‘fashion.’ But I can be in white leggings and a white sports bra and I’m on a whole other level of sh– that those girls don’t even get yet because they don’t know how to do it.”
And perhaps the most worrisome of all: “I’m someone who cares about the real things in life. There are things that are personal that stress me out, but my career? That doesn’t affect me. I know I’m doing what I’m supposed to be doing.”