WARNING: This story contains spoilers from tonight’s Supernatural finale. Don’t read if you haven’t watched.
UPDATED: This season of Supernatural was frequently referred to as season “GR8,” so Wednesday’s finale had a lot to live up to.
So how’d it do? Two words: Holy crap.
In fact, I probably uttered those two words about a dozen times during tonight’s episode, starting with the first moments, which revealed that Crowley’s next victim was Sheriff Jody Mills! (As you’ll recall, he was going down the list of people the Winchesters had saved and undoing their good deeds.) But before Crowley could off her, the boys came up with a proposal: an exchange. The demon tablet for the angel tablet.
So they met up at Bobby’s old junk yard (awww!) to make the switch, but the boys ended up pulling a fast one on ol’ Crowley by locking him up in demon-proof handcuffs. (The look on Dean’s face was priceless.) “You’re the last trial,” Sam told him. Sam was going to cure Crowley.
They took him to some consecrated ground to start the process, and for a while, it looked like all was going to go according to plan. Sam purified his blood, via Confession, and was on the road to getting the last trial done. “For the first time in a long time, it feels like we’re going to win,” he even told Dean. That, to me, was pretty much the sign that things were going to go horribly wrong. Then, Castiel showed up and requested Dean’s assistance. Hello, even bigger sign of Horrible Things to Come. (Up to that point, Castiel had continued to pursue the Angel Trials, but his progress was stalled when Naomi showed up and taken Metatron.)
At first, Dean hesitated, saying he didn’t want to leave Sam alone. (“If anyone needs a chaperone while doing the heavy lifting, it’s Sam,” he said.) But in the end, Dean ended up going with Castiel, and Sam was left alone with Crowley. Sure enough, once Dean was gone, trouble brewed. Crowley was able to get his hands on some of Sam’s blood (by biting him) and called for some help from the underworld. I fully expected an of army of baddies to show up, but it was Abaddon who answered and unleashed her fury. She honestly could have sabotaged the entire trial — and killed Sam — but she got greedy. Instead of helping Crowley, she tried working herself into a position of power, which gave Sam just enough time to sneak up behind her and burn her meat suit. I can’t wait to see how she comes back next season. She’s a pretty badass demon woman.
Back in Heaven, Naomi ended up finding out that Metatron was a big fat liar and that Castiel was NOT completing trials — he was a pawn in Metatron’s plan to carry out a spell that would expel all the angels from heaven. (She found this out after getting inside Metatron’s noggin.) Naomi tried to warn Dean and Cas, telling them that Metatron had bad intentions and that Sam would die if he completed the trials, but Castiel didn’t think she was telling the truth.
Dean, however, immediately ran to Sam to talk him out of completing the last trial. When he arrived, he found that Sam was extremely close to curing Crowley, who had been slowly fraying. (One of the best “Crowley is breaking” moments is in the quotes section below. Bravo to Mark Sheppard for those scenes.) The last step was upon Sam when Dean stumbled into the church.
When he tried explaining to Sam the “slight change of plan,” Sam resisted. Sam argued that he’d already gone through so much to get as far as he had, and added that even if Naomi was telling the truth, he was willing to die to close the gates of Hell forever. Dean’s counter argument? They could “turn the tides” with their new bevy of knowledge. “But I can’t do it without you,” he said.
Sam: You can barely do it with me. You think I screw up everything I try. I need a chaperone, remember?
Dean: C’mon, man. That’s not what I meant.
Sam: It’s exactly what you meant. Do you want to know what I confessed in there? What my greatest sin was? It was how many times I let you down. I can’t do that again.
Sam: What happens when you decide that I can’t be trusted again? Who are you going to turn to next time instead of me? Another angel? Another vampire? [Crying] Do you have any idea what it feels like to have your brother…
Dean: Hold on! You seriously think that? Because none of it — none of it — is true. Look, man, I know I’ve said some junk that set you back on your heels, but, Sammy, c’mon, I killed Benny to save you. I’m willing to let this bastard and all the sons of bitches that killed mom walk because of you. Don’t you dare think that there is anything — past or present — that I would put in front of you. It has never been like that. Ever. I need you to see that. I’m begging you.
Sam: How do I stop?
Dean: Just let it go.
Sam: I can’t, Dean. You don’t know what it feels like.
Dean: Listen, we’ll figure it out, okay? Just like we always do.
[Sorry that was so long, guys. I basically want a transcript of the last five minutes of the episode because it was THAT good.]
By the end, Dean stopped Sam from finishing the trials, but as a result, Sam is suffering some very bad effects. But that wasn’t even the worst thing — Castiel, who went back to Heaven to sort everything out, ended up finding out that Naomi was, indeed, telling the truth about Metatron. (RIP, Naomi and her suits.) Before Castiel could put up a fight, Metatron tied him down and cut out his “essence and grace” in order to complete the spell. The last image of the season? A bunch of angels coming down from heaven. Woah.
So, to recap: we have Sam still down for the count, Castiel without his grace and essence (does this mean…he’s human?), Crowley VERY close to being cured of his demon-ness, and angels falling from the sky. Yup, it’s a Supernatural finale, y’all. Season 9, get here now!
Your turn: Tell me your thoughts.
Dean: You hit the demon tablet under the devil? Seriously?
Kevin: What? I was delirious.
Dean: This is a secret lair, understand me? No keggers.
Kevin: I don’t have any friends.
Dean: Show us yours and we’ll show you ours.
Crowley: Really, Dean? I’m trying to conduct a professional negotiation and you want to talk dangly bits?
Dean: The contract?
[Crowley rolls out a giant scroll]
Dean: Yeah, I’m sure there are no hidden agendas in there.
“Would you say say you’re looking for a partner in crime or someone who’s into nurse role play and light domination.” — Castiel to bartender
Dean, giving Sam ideas for Confession: Hey, what about what you did to Penny Markel in the sixth grade? Lead with that.
Sam: That was you.
Dean: Carry on.
Castiel: You really think it’s wise you be drinking on the job?
Dean: What show you been watchin’?
“All those motels, you never once watched HBO? Not once? Girls! You’re my Marnie, Moose. And Hannah just needs to be loved. She deserves it. Don’t we all? You, me — we deserve to be loved. I DESERVE to be loved.” — Crowley, breaking.
“Earlier, when you were confessing back there, what did you say? I only ask because, given my history, it raises the question: Where do I start to even look for forgiveness?” — Crowley