Raise a glass to a stellar sophomore season of The Walking Dead and shake up a zombie — well liquor only, of course.
Remember how there was supposed to be a 13th sign of the zodiac, and it was a big deal? And then it wasn’t? Toss back an Oh, Phew, There’s No Ophiuchus snakebite to commemorate the terror-inducing, tongue-twisting sign (whose name translates to “serpent bearer”), then double down with a Rapture-rita for all the cosmic disasters that weren’t in 2011.
What would 2011 have been without Courtney Stodden, Doug Hutchison, and their shameless antics? In honor of the May-September romance that sent shivers up our collective spine, quaff a Pumpkin Divine to commemorate that time they got kicked out of a family pumpkin patch (a pumpkin patch!) for being… well… too divine.
Honey Badger don’t give a what if you’re drinking in his honor or not, but still, you might as well raise a glass of honey bourbon and cola (to match that sassy beast’s silky, black coat).
Even though dancing, singing, Patronus-ing Daniel Radcliffe won the year, there will always be a special place in this girl’s heart for Neville Longbottom (Matthew Lewis). As such, I invite you to join me in knocking back a Neville Longbottom Iced Tea, which is basically the same as a Long Island iced tea, but with pumpkin juice instead of cola. For those who are extra crafty, throw in a dash of polyjuice potion to drink in the deliciousness as Neville himself. Fair warning: If you have enough, you’ll feel like you’ve been hit by the obliviate spell.
And, for what seems like the millionth year running, we can’t let any glass empty in 2011 without acknowledging vampires. They’re not going anywhere. For Twilight, a glass of sparkling wine will suffice. For True Blood, try a reader-suggested concoction, the Red Headed Vamp (a down-and-dirty shooter composed of Jägermeister, Chambord, cranberry juice, and grenadine, topped with a cherry in Jessica Hamby’s honor). While you’re at it, have some mead for Richelle Mead’s super-popular Vampire Academy series. And that’s without mentioning another series of Buffy comics (thank you, Joss Whedon!) and the continued awesomeness of The Vampire Diaries.
Flying this New Year’s Eve? Try Alec Baldwin’s Words with Blends inflight whiskey. It may not be as calming as playing digital Scrabble, but it’ll take the edge off when you want (inevitably) to mouth off to your flight attendant or slam the plane’s lavatory door into oblivion.
On New Year’s Day, your party-ravaged vocal cords will likely need some TLC — not unlike Adele, Keith Urban, and John Mayer. Try a Throat Coat teatini, equal parts Throat Coat tea and tea-infused vodka (if you like), plus soothing lemon juice and soda water with a dash of simple syrup.
If tea’s not your thing, do a 2011 twist on an old morning-after classic: A Tiger Blood-y Mary. It’s made just like a regular Bloody Mary, but with a dash of Charlie Sheen’s Adonis DNA and tiger blood. Warning: After too many of these, the room will be #spinning!
In anticipation of next year, sip on The Girl With the Dragonfruit Mojito, much like Lisbeth Salander would have sipped in her Caribbean exodus during the first chapters of 2012’s upcoming The Girl Who Played With Fire. Irene Nesser would approve.
And don’t forget to pour one out for these homies: Friday Night Lights, Clarence Clemons, Andy Whitfield, Amy Winehouse, Harry Morgan, Heavy D, Jerry Leiber, Nick Ashford, Sidney Lumet, Liz Taylor, Peter Falk, The Playboy Club, Ryan Dunn, H8R, Patrice O’Neal, Jack LaLanne, Jeff Conaway, Cliff Robertson, Gil Scott-Heron, Rescue Me, Jane Russell, Betty Ford, Pete Postelthwaite, Nate Dogg, Lanford Wilson, Entourage, Bill Hunter, “Macho Man” Randy Savage, Sherwood Schwartz, All My Children, Bubba Smith, Sylvia Robinson, Sue Mengers, Bil Keane, Jerry Robinson, Dan Wheldon, and Jani Lane
So, PopWatchers, what sweet nectar will you be enjoying in honor of your favorite pop culture moments of 2011?