'Millionaire Matchmaker' Patti Stanger gives controversial, uh, 'advice' during 'Watch What Happens' visit


Image Credit: FilmMagic.com

If you tuned in for the season 5 premiere of Watch What Happens Live Sunday night, you watched horrified host Andy Cohen listen to Millionaire Matchmaker‘s Patti Stanger giving advice making judgments and sweeping generalizations about the gay community.

While visiting the Bravo talk show, Stanger took calls from fans, including one man who asked what her feelings were on open, long-distance relationships. After giving a vague, not-entirely-helpful answer (“Long distance relationships are great because they go faster and are quicker to close to a serious [relationship], almost marriage”), Stanger then asked the caller if he was gay. Not that that should matter, right PopWatchers? If a straight person called with the same question Stanger would give the same response, right? Wrong! We are so very wrong.

According to Stanger, “In the gay world, there’s always going to be open [relationships].” After telling caller Dustin “You’re going to be okay” because he’s gay and in an open relationship, Cohen gave a stink face that could have matched or trumped anyone’s on Project Runway. Cohen, being the journalist/rational human person that he is, wanted clarification. “So wait, gays can have open relationships?” he pondered. Thank goodness he asked.

“There’s no curbing the gay … I’ve tried to curb you people,” Stanger responded. “I’ve decided to throw in the towel and just say, ‘Do what you want. But when you find the right person, you will know.'” Stanger then went on to say that when that love is found, gay men will no longer want to do things like use social networking sites, prompting Cohen to make a face that would rival this.

After hearing enough of Stanger’s sage advice (“When you love that person, you don’t wanna be with anyone else … There’s your right hand”), Cohen interjected. “I’m a gay and I’m down for the monogamy,” he told her. Naturally, Stanger (who later told a fan who Skyped in, “You’re very handsome. I thought you were straight … that’s a compliment”, watch here around the 4:28 mark) laughed in Cohen’s face and asked when his last serious relationship was. Cohen shared that it was a three-year-long courtship that happened six years ago. “So since business took off, you kicked him to the curb?” she asked. No wonder people pay her top dollar for expertise! As Cohen put it best during one point of the horrendously awkward interview, “I’m uncomfortable!” (Check out that NSFW moment below around the 4:01 mark.)

The now-single Stanger has always been something of guilty pleasure television, but at this point, are we just guilty of letting her get away with saying some truly absurd things? (Case in point: On her magical misery press tour, Stanger told local gab fest New York Live about her feeling on single Manhattan women: “The girls are jaded and I think they have a bitter complex, which means they have to get out of their zip codes and date in the suburbs.”) So should we really be giving another show to someone making outrageous statements like these or will her car crash appeal make her that much more interesting to watch what happens? Share in the comments section below, PopWatchers!

UPDATE: Stanger has tweeted in response to the comments she made on Watch What Happens Live, “Attn male Gays: I support you & my comment on WWHL was to a LA guy who can’t find commitment.” That tweet came a few minutes after Stanger posted from her page, “…It’s true LA gays toughest nuts to crack to monogamy!”

Read more:
‘Millionaire Matchmaker’ Patti Stanger may get another show
‘Millionaire Matchmaker’ star Patti Stanger calls off engagement
‘The Millionaire Matchmaker': 17 Prime-Time Character Fixups

Comments (117 total) Add your comment
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  • freddy

    She is ugly, inside and out.
    Not all gays want open relationships and not all straight are in monogamous relationships.

    • Michelle

      Very true…on all points. I am a straight female and out of my friends, gay and straight, the gay couples have more of a monogamous relationship than my straight friends. This woman needs to take a long look in the mirror (if she can stomach it) and fix herself before trying to impose her bigoted views on others.

      • Cathy

        Thank you Michelle…I’ve been in my relationship for 13 years….She doesn’t have a clue what she is talking about.

      • MultiPass

        I’m gay. And, as irritating as I find hearing these things coming from someone like her, she isn’t off the mark. Most gay MEN are not monogamous and the majority of couples do sexplay together or separately. It’s REALITY. And it sucks for those of us who prefer monogamy – we exist! But we’re not the majority, plain and simple.

      • Melly

        ITA with you, Michelle. Patty Stanger is the one who is jaded and bitter. She is filled ill/ pre-conceived notions about people. Her “match-making” is a combination of knowing how to pick up on key words/phrases, reading body language and stereotyping. She knows nothing about real life outside of the LA dating scene.

    • Eric P

      She didn’t say all gays want open relationships. But frankly as a gay man, it is more common than ppl think. I’ve seen friends in relationships have a husband AND a BF. And Andy is the worst kinda gay he’s one of those “my Sh1t don’t stink” kinda gays. The kind of person who acts like they wouldnt and then you see out and about misbehavin’.

      • SS

        A husband and a BF? How stupid. And as if you have any idea what Andy Cohen does in his private life. He said he hasn’t had a serious relationship in a long time (also he seems to be the head of a network, pretty sure it’s hard to find someone in his position).
        Shut it.

      • MultiPass

        Andy Cohen is a typical LA power queen. He is hardnosed but facile on the surface, annoying, rich, and full of himself. However he is not particularly good looking compared to most of the blown dry girls in the LA gay scene. So it’s no surprise he is single.

      • @Multipass

        Well except for the fact that he lives in New York you moron…

    • Reality

      Dan Savage says this – no one cares. She says it and it’s big news!?!? Why? Because she’s not a gay man?

  • ‘Lish

    What an unbelievable b!tch.

  • Nicole

    How this troll stays in business is beyond me.

  • Frenchie

    Who actually pays her for advise and hook-ups? Has anyone she brought together actually lasted beyond a couple of dates. Seems like a reality show ‘star’ and nothing more.

    • Chris

      Anyone think she’s Mel Gibson’s matchmaker? It would explain a lot.

      • Anna

        After her comment about jewish men being liars, I have to agree with you.

    • kate middleton

      I know, right? She says she has a 99% success rate in her intro. She must be setting up a lot of perfect people outside the show…because no one on the show works out. Does not compute.

      • Laura K.

        Actually, she’s said “extremely high” for the last couple of seasons (“an extremely high success rate.” Guess she couldn’t back up the 99% thing.

  • Michael

    If you watch her show, and really listen to what she is saying, she makes a lot of sense.

    • Kevin

      You know when some crazy person starts talking about having seen an angel perform a miracle and there are people that listen to the ridiculous story and believe it? They say, “if you actually listen to the story, it makes total sense?” Well, the reason that second person believes the story is because they too are crazy. Much like you.

  • JB

    I really dislike her. That’s why I can’t watch her stupid show.

  • hannah

    I don’t totally agree w/ the gay comments but for the most part, I think she says the truth. For example, women want this “perfect” man but they aren’t perfect themselves. If you want a hot, rich man who doesn’t cheat then you should have a slammin body, be smart but not think too much and cause unneeded drama. Likewise, if you’re a slob with money who attracts hot women, realize the true reason.I personally think Sex and the City ruined things for women b/c it taught us that if a relationship isn’t perfect, then move on … nothing is perfect, people. It’s like Oprah telling everyone to “follow their bliss”. Reality is that we need garbage men and ditch diggers and maids, everyone can’t follow their bliss and it leaves them feeling like losers when they aren’t.

    • Sara

      SATC taught us if the relationship isn’t perfect then move on? Really? Charlotte ended up with someone Jewish who she admittedly doesn’t think is handsome or as pretty as her… Carrie ended up wtih a dirtbag who’s dumped her and stayed distant for most of the series.. Samantha was rarely tied down and Miranda made her marriage work even though he was a bartender and wanted to move to Brooklyn.
      You’re an idiot.

      • bob

        this is definitely true, but i think what the OP is saying is that satc did have an underlying message of waiting for mr. right. you can disagree, but you don’t have to call anyone an idiot.

      • lily

        How many good guys did they turn away for dumb reasons? And in the end, they “settled” imho. She’s not an idiot.

      • KJ

        did you really just apply a fictional TV show to real life?

    • jr

      Wow. I can’t believe you just applied FICTIONAL television to reality. Seriously honey, you need to get with it. Patti is an idiot and she gives very very bad advice. If you think Patti’s advice is sage, then you really need help.

  • meme

    i’ve never seen her show where her ‘matchmaking’ leads to a relationship.

    • Linda

      Guess you haven’t watched them all! One darling couple are madly in love. He was from Louisiana, I believe, and a total gentleman. She was classy and a beautiful woman. Family was very important to both of them.

      • SaraInSeattle

        Oh great, so you watched 62.5 episodes and saw one match. Great, so you wasted 63 hours.

  • SandaSavi

    Fortunately my DRV stopped recording and I didn’t mind at all. I stopped watching Millionaire last season. And, Andy is getting boring too. I am losing my interest in Bravo, Top Chef is the only thing I want to watch, but with the Texas Season coming I’m not sure I want to watch what happens…

    • Laura K.

      Top Chef Texas is kind of scary. How many barbecues and chili cook-offs can they have? (And yes, I’m sure there’s more to Texas cuisine than that, but TC DOES tend to take a theme and play it to death).

  • BobS

    As a gay man, I have to admit that most of the couples I know in monogamous relationships, will take a discreet tickle here and there if the situation arises, the guy is hot and they don’t think they will get discovered. Just the way it is. All men are dogs and when you put two dogs together…..well, you see the picture.

    • Linda

      Thanks for being honest!

    • Eric P

      If you’re looking for a tickle then it isn’t monogamous.

    • bob

      ita. there is a significant portion of the gay community that is fine with open relationships. full disclosure, i’m not one of them, and i prefer monogamy, but i have plenty of friends that have flings while being, ahem, “monogamous.” also, i don’t think stanger is the be-all-end-all of dating advice (i mean, hello, girlfriend isn’t even in a relationship herself!), but i understand what she was saying. she could have had more couth, but she rarely does.

  • farkennel

    BobS,saying all men are dogs just reinforces my disgust at you and those who do what you do.Run along now and infect all your fellow dogs.Those of us left standing will laugh you all the way into the grave.

    • lily

      He’s just telling it like it is, men are sexually driven. Sorry if you don’t want to believe it. While you’re eating ice cream complaining about some girl at work who annoys you, he’s tuning you out and thinking about the hot chick on tv. So if you want to keep your man happy you better get your freak out b/c that laying like a dead fish is going to get you divorced.

    • Eric P

      There is something called safe sex farkennl. And as for dying dont be so smug because you’ll be getting there too.

  • Susie

    Although I agree with some points she made I don’t agree one hundred per cent. I am not a gold digger and I took wedding vows of for richer or poorer. I am 16 years into bliss in my marriage and not all of it has been icing on the cake. I married out of LOVE and money was not the # one factor. It won’t keep you warm at night or get you off. It isn’t there if you are sick and all of a sudden you are not Mrs perfect.
    She is almost 50 and has never been married. I was single for many years and stopped looking. He found me. He was “THE ONE”. Gay or straight everyone deserves to be loved and when the times are tough you don’t leave the sinking ship. I will not always be perfect but the love has grown and that is all I wish for the world and for Patti. She needs real love and needs to not boss the man around. It is an equal firty fifty relationship. I only hope cupid hits her and her own list of Mr Perfect fades when she looks into the eyes of her own soul mate. Good luck Patti. Remember The Beatles once said that money can’t buy you love and they were right.

  • GeeMoney

    Oh please. As polarizing as Stanger’s comments are, I bet that there is a lot of truth in them. I mean, the woman has been matchmaking for over 20 years now, and I’d like to think that she has seen it all. Stereotypes and generalizations suck, but they wouldn’t exist if there wasn’t some type of truth to them.

  • Brian Wallace

    Stop trying make controversy out of nothing. This is why Entertainment Weekly will be gone in 2 years. She speaks the truth. You may not want to admit it, but almost everything she says is correct. Sorry to burst your I-live-in-Manhattan-and-am-completely-out-of-touch-with-the-real-world bubble.


    • Squishmar

      I think EW is doing okay. They’ve been around since 1990 and don’t seem to be slowing down. They’re just trying to get hits on articles and look– it worked! Both you and I are commenting here. Plus the fact, it seems to me that GLAAD is the one making a controversy out of nothing (as usual); EW is just reporting on it.

  • Louise

    I have WWHL on season pass, but when I saw that she was going to be on, I cancelled recording of that episode. She makes my skin crawl.

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