Image Credit: Todd Williamson/WireImage.com
Today marked the biggest event of the year. No, I’m not talking about the Super Bowl. Or the Oscars. I’m not even talking about the Royal Wedding. I’m referring, of course, to the nuptials involving America’s version of a Royal Family, the Kardashians. Who needs a dashing prince and his demure bride when you’ve got a former sex tape star and her boyfriend of less than a year? That’s the American way! Today, before family and friends (including Demi Lovato, Eva Longoria, Lindsay Lohan, and more) — and, of course, E!’s cameras — Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries finally said their “I dos,” satisfying a tabloid-obsessed nation hungry for another derrière to examine since Pippa Middleton walked the aisle in April. We’ll have to wait until Oct. 9 to watch the proceedings ourselves — and see if Bruce Jenner convinced the deejay to spin some tunes from “Can’t Stop the Music” (please!) — but, until then, let’s just all think about the fact that Kardashian and Humphries will make more money posing for one photo than we’ll ever collect in one lifetime. Say it with me Keeping Up with the Kardashians executive producer Ryan Seacrest: “Oh, hell no. Say what?“
Follow Kate on Twitter @KateWardEW
Read more:
One day before Kim Kardashian’s wedding: How to kill time until the blessed event
Kim Kardashian sends out her wedding invitations: Did you get one?
Kim Kardashian’s wedding registry: Hurry up and buy the $195 ice tongs before someone else does!








I was hoping al-Khaida crashed the wedding…
to the divorce has begun. I give them 8 months or less.
Here’s hoping its one of the those Chris Benoit/OJ Simpson type “divorces”
I give them 3 months, let’s make a bet
Really Nathan? You should probably see a therapist if you find yourself wishing such terrible things on someone you’ve never even met. I get that you might think her life is shoved down your throat by the press, but your reaction to her marriage is more distasteful than anything she’s ever done.
Do you think this Bimbo has any clue how much she is hated or is she just laughing all the way to the bank?
I like the body language in that photo.
Kim is clearly saying “don’t touch my hair or my dress”.
Either that or his arms are shorter than I imagined and that giant caboose of hers is pushing him too far back.
I think this whole thing was just a “production” in the true sense: Casting notices were sent out early in the year, In March, they cast the male lead. The performance was in August, and after post production, it will air in October. WHAT A SHAM!
Heard, but didn’t care…
The traditional Armenian wedding present is brand new unopenned rolls of T.P. for the spare guestroom.
rachel…It’s not quite *that* fake. If it were, they would have cast a better looking leading man.
Bibi wins the bet. LOL!
Wow, you managed to be racist and perverted at the same time. Yeah you.
Get a grip. She did make her name for a sex tape with an African-American guy, so jay is sorta correct.
jay’s actually 100% correct, sucking that black snake was the only convincing acting that moron’s ever done.
This is to Nathan,,,At least she knows that Blacker the berry the sweeter the juice. Plus, Kris is also Black,so what is your point?
Well Jay, you can be sure that guy on the sex tape is one of many. That Kris Humphries must sure feel like a lucky guy. Marrying that piece of trash must be like buying a very, very used car that’s been given a new paint job and was just serviced. Everything works, but the mileage figures are horrendous.
Cindy,, how can you call Kim trash? I bet you have had just as many men crawling between your legs as she,or maybe not . Maybe that’s the reason for you calling her trash. If you slept with any man that you wasn’t married too,you sinned. So,Kim sin is no different from yours. Trash recognizes trash,you get my drift.
No one with half a brain cell or a ounce of class cares.
famous for nothing but being plastic! no one cares! and its nota big event
Worse…famous because of a sex tape
Will, you are wrong. It is a big event (adding to the decline of Western civilization). And judging from the around 185 comments on this post, some people care. (Idiots.) She’s also not famous for being plastic (?), she’s famous for being famous- i.e. having a sex tape and a successful reality show (Paris Hilton style!).
summer- if you dont care then why are you taking the time to comment you dont care?? Wouldnt that be pointless.
I’m surprised Reggie Bush didn’t show up and pull a “Graduate” move…..just think of the ratings!
This is such a joke.
Reggie, Austin, Shango (sp)…even the no-talent Ray J are such a step up from this guy. He reminds me of the cavemen from the geico ads. And sounds just as intelligent.
So, in other words Dort,you are jealous.
armo slut likes the big fat black penis what a surprise there
I am a nurses,young and beautiful.and now I am
seeking a good man who can give me real love , so i got a username Anna2002 on
——Meet’Wealthy.C óM—— .a nice club for y’ounger women and old’er men, or older women and younger men, to interact with each other.
Maybe you wanna check it out or tell your friends.
———-
Only a racist would care what color the penis was. She made a sex tape, profited from it, and pretended she was a victim. That’s the How to be a Star 101 course taught by Paris Hilton.
What if the penis is green?
Then you probably shouldn’t stick your mouth on it…
A lime flavored man? Yummers.
@@@Tom,
You’re a reallyt sick puppy, man!
If you’re talking about the comment above yours, I’m not the original poster and I’m not a man. And how can it be sick to like lime?
WHY IS THIS ‘NEWS’ ON EW!?!?! THEY’RE BEGINNING TO LOSE ME AS A LOYAL READER
SNORRRRE – boring and sad
Demi Lovato? Lindsay Lohan? Not exactly the A List of Hollywood. More like E! List…
Is Pipa Middleto is A list for you then.
You spelled it wrong. It’s “Pippa Cameltoe”
To think I used to have some respect for Demi Lovato…..
Okay, this was actually the first clever thing said in these comments.
The kardashians are a embarrassment to the USA
so, you think Kate Middleto is good for USA, please give me a break.
I never said that
Pretty sure the Middleton sisters have more class in their pinkie fingers then those Kardashian sluts.
You totally said that!
Uh…WHAT! I’m confused. Are you assuming that “Katie” is Kate Ward? The writer of this article? Otherwise your comment makes zero sense. The writer’s always use their whole name when responding.
Who cares if Kate (not Middleton but the Duchess of Cambridge) is good for the US. They aren’t your Royal couple. The point is some people in the US think this news is just as big or bigger than the Duke & Duchess getting married. Regardless of your feelings toward the Royal couple or the British Monarchy…Kim Kardashian is miles below the two “Middleton” sisters & certainly the woman who will one day be queen to several countries. I am thankful to Catherine for presenting herself as a respectable human being.
Why is this even NEWS!? These people have absolutely no talent, and yet E! and the idiots who watch this reality show think that they’re great and entertaining. Really??!! I wish they, L. Lohan, C. Sheen, P. Hilton……….you know what the list is too long, but all these annoying talentless people should go away. Yes, I know that at one point in his life Charlie Sheen was a good actor, but right now he’s just annoying.
Sofia…..you obviously reading this and commenting on it so its some news to you. Otherwise why are you on here commenting on these annoying people and what they do???? I think if they want to put their life on National TV and make a fool out of themselves then so be it. But i watch this and realize how lucky i am to have been brought up the way i was and not like that.
Wonder how many times the camera zooms in on her wide-angle butt for the filming of the sure-to-be tasteful wedding-for-TV. That Kim – she’s a CL-ASS act.
yeah, nothing says class like a bride that likes golden showers. when, oh when, will her 15 freakin’ minutes be up?
That is K-l-a-s-s. You spelled it wrong.
Kim said I was too fat to be in her wedding so I ate the 8 tier wedding cake during the ceremony. E! filmed me binging on her Happy Cake – be sure to tune in some night at 3:00 am for the world premier!
LAME!
Doing a fat joke with Khloe!
Never heard that before buddy (Rolls eyes).
I’m going to take a wild guess here, Amy – you’re a porker too?
@Joe….LOL!
Yes, just because she slightly resembles Chewbacca and has the maturity of an 11 year old boy doesn’t mean she doesn’t have feelings.
WAAAAAHHHHHH
*eats 2 bags of Cheetos and chugs a 2-liter Mountain Dew*
I was visibly moved during the ceremony – my face almost moved a few times.
Did you buy a special set of earrings for the ceremony too?
Wow, how extremely hilarious. (how many times have I heard that one before?)
So, wedding special in October. Divorce Court for November Sweeps?
Oh I really want to know if Scott Disick and Kourtney get married. He’ll probably pull a Sean Penn and sucker punch every photographer or man who lays a hand on his new wife at the wedding reception (after being drunk 3 drinks deep)! And even in his retro ’80s Miami Vice like pastel suits! THAT would make a good wedding special on E to match with the trainwreck mentatlity of some reality shows!
I think you meant “kate” not “pippa”
Aww, it’s love the awesomest?!?
WHO CARES!
waiting for some jerk to post…..”well obviously you do or you would not have read the article”
Who cares? THE MEDIA, that’s who. Nobody cares about the Kardashian litter but the media thinks that they can make us. They can’t. I don’t care about them.
Yeah, it’s annoying when people use that response.
Thanks Toronto Tom!
Why is the media forcing them down our throats? It seems like most everyone is completely tired of this crew while the rest of us are wondering why they are famous in the first place.
Please stop it with this!
For some reason, their show gets the ratings. So you can’t blame EW or other magazines for “reporting” on these things… blame the viewers who keep them on tv.
…..”well obviously you do or you would not have read the article”
This is what I was coming to comment. Except I was going to add “who THE F cares”.
I agree completely. I didn’t read the article because *I* don’t care. I think the whole crew are a blight on the American psyche.
I just puked in my mouth.
Just stop. America’s royal family would be the Kennedy’s and not a family that only got famous because the father was a member of a lawyer defense team and the stepfather was an Olympian. I know that sound rude but this is just shows that America is tumbling down into stupidity if the Kardashian wedding is getting this much attention. It is just a barely C list celebrity marring a player that might start or play for a team that was barely a basketball team.
“marring” is right.
America’s version of the royal family? Are you s hitting me? That’s the biggest joke of the year and it’s not even funny! Americans are embarrassed by this trashy family and feel that IN NO WAY are they anything but royal pains in our a$$es!
you are the one who is embarrassed, not Americans. what is trashy family for you, if you dont like them dont post comment.
People who don’t like them are the exact ones who SHOULD comment on this ridiculous post. EW should know that everyone thinks this family is a JOKE. I wonder when we should expect the honeymoon sex tape.
No, every American I know hopes they die, myself included
America loves crap.
America’s royal family- really ew, beyond sad!
That’s the joke.
Andi, it’s beyond sad that you don’t get the joke. Britain has the Middletons, America has the Kardashians.
Who really gives a crap about this woman – other than Kris. Wish she would climb in a dingy with Charlie Sheen and start rowing to China.
If you dont care why you post comment on it.
She didn’t say she cared, she asked why YOU care. And lets face it, why anyone cares about these hos and trash is puzzling to a great deal of people.
I agree, who cares! She is famous for her sex tape! Has no talent at all… only in America would a talentless ho become a millionnaire because of the public! Unbelievable! USA! USA! USA!