Today marked the biggest event of the year. No, I’m not talking about the Super Bowl. Or the Oscars. I’m not even talking about the Royal Wedding. I’m referring, of course, to the nuptials involving America’s version of a Royal Family, the Kardashians. Who needs a dashing prince and his demure bride when you’ve got a former sex tape star and her boyfriend of less than a year? That’s the American way! Today, before family and friends (including Demi Lovato, Eva Longoria, Lindsay Lohan, and more) — and, of course, E!’s cameras — Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries finally said their “I dos,” satisfying a tabloid-obsessed nation hungry for another derrière to examine since Pippa Middleton walked the aisle in April. We’ll have to wait until Oct. 9 to watch the proceedings ourselves — and see if Bruce Jenner convinced the deejay to spin some tunes from “Can’t Stop the Music” (please!) — but, until then, let’s just all think about the fact that Kardashian and Humphries will make more money posing for one photo than we’ll ever collect in one lifetime. Say it with me Keeping Up with the Kardashians executive producer Ryan Seacrest: “Oh, hell no. Say what?”
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