Hide yo’ kids from the TV set, PopWatchers. The reports are true: An Antoine Dodson reality show is currently in the works. According to ”leading international entertainment content and distribution business” Entertainment One — which confirms to EW that it is developing a pilot starring Dodson — “The show tracks Antoine, the oldest of six siblings, using the money he is making from his hit song on iTunes and his best-selling Halloween costume to make a fresh start for the Dodson clan on the West Coast. With a potential new record deal in the works and money coming in from a variety of avenues, the show tracks how a news story sparked a new life for him and his family.”
Naturally, this news got me thinking about other viral video stars who I would watch on the small screen. And, for your ease, TV producers, I’ve even gone through the trouble of developing the plot and title for you. Let’s do this, Leroy!
- Grape Stomp Lady: The newswoman famous for taking a nasty tumble while attempting to squash grapes travels to Napa Valley, where she opens a winery. The one caveat: In order to sell her wine, she must go through a series of Wipeout-esque obstacle courses in order to get to her grapes. Providing commentary for the show, of course, will be two pseudo-sympathetic news colleagues. Title: Grapes of Wrath
- Dramatic Prairie Dog: After years of being unfairly pegged an evil genius, Dramatic Prairie Dog sets out to prove to the world that he is far from evil, and is just a cuddly, cute, anim — why, yes, that is a picture of him with Dick Cheney, what of it? Title: D.P.D.’s Road to Redemption
- “So She’s Enjoying Penis” anchor: New Orleans news anchor Michael Hill is searching for love in the Big Easy with plenty of, ahem, easy ladies. Title: Are You Enjoying My Penis?
- Double Rainbow guy: Paul “Bear” Vasquez hosts a series that challenges a pool of 10 contestants to take some hallucinogens, spin around 10 times with their head on a baseball bat, and attempt to buy a pack of Skittles. Prize: That talking unicorn they saw sail over the glitter patch on their way to the 7-11. Title: The Surreal Life (We’ll deal with copyright issues later.)
- Surprise Kitty: Just Surprise Kitty. On a loop. Non-stop. For hours. Title: Who Wants to Feel Pure Bliss?
Your turn, PopWatchers: Create your own reality show for a viral video star!