Ricky Gervais says he will not return as Golden Globes host. Too bad, since he scored 6.4 on the Lange/Colbert Scale.

Gervais-at-Golden-GlobesImage Credit: Paul Drinkwater/NBCThis hour, Ricky Gervais is making headlines for telling TMZ that he would decline an invitation to host the Golden Globes for a third time, following his controversial turn Sunday night. And, really, that’s incredibly unfortunate, since 40 hours after the ceremony, we’re finally getting official measurements of the host’s performance on the Lange/Colbert Scale. For those of you unfamiliar with that particular scientific metric, the Lange/Colbert Scale assesses the cleverness, cajones, and comic reverberations of a guest’s performance. At one end of the sliding scale is Artie Lange, whose irreverently crude hijacking of Joe Buck’s HBO sports talk show scored an awful/awesome 0.2 on the LCS. At the other end of the scale was Stephen Colbert’s in-the-face heckling of a sitting U.S. president and the White House press corp: an unprecedented 10.1 on the LCS, which until that incident, only went up to 10.0.

Somewhere in between was Gervais’ act on Sunday night. He ripped into several easy celebrity targets, metaphorically knocked the teeth out of Hollywood Foreign Press Association prez, Philip Berk — before joking that he helped put them back in — and left some of the audience in the theater simmering. He even rocked the Hollywood third-rail: Scientology. But just as some angry HFPA members were promising retribution, Jon Stewart and Chelsea Handler’s minions were lauding Gervais’ feat. Popular opinion was also strongly in his corner, according to our poll.

But now, we have official scientific evidence: Gervais’ eruption measured a 6.4 on the Lange/Colbert Scale. It’s a complicated formula, so I won’t bore you with the math, but he certainly got points for screaming to millions what many only dare whisper to their friends. Clearly, he also lost points for being a party-pooper, and planting the mental image of Hugh Hefner without his smoking robe. Sure, Gervais has announced that he would not return as Globes host, but can we all agree the ratings for such a show would dwarf anything the Globes can imagine?

So there you have it. The debate, for some reason, continues, but if someone asks you how Gervais did at the Globes, you can tell him with confidence: 6.4.

Read more:
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HFPA on Ricky Gervais: ‘Outrageous’; Gervais responds with ‘everyone took it well’
Ricky Gervais’ rudest Golden Globes jokes

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  • Brenda Barrett

    I thought he was hilarious — the comments were no rougher than what you hear on Comedy Central or old Dean Martin roasts, and he’s a comedian, for Pete’s sake. I tuned in specifically for his remarks, and I wasn’t disappointed.

    • um

      He was at times a little bit too crazy. I’m fine with sarcasm, but he got a little bit too mouthy at times. The Tim Allen joke was wrong.

      • Jane

        Why? Tim Allen is a nobody compared to Hanks. I doubt he cried himself to sleep that night anyway.

      • GOB

        No, the Tim Allen joke was hilarious and true. If Allen hadn’t had the good fortune to get the Buzz Lightyear gig all those years ago, he would be a footnote in the history of entertainment by now.

      • tomm

        Oh boo hoo, Tim Allen is a big boy. He’s doing tons of commercial voice overs, and rolling in $$.

      • Lesley

        The Tim Allen joke was one of my favorites. I was still giggling the next morning!

    • Mick

      I honestly can’t think of another award hosting job that has garnered this much press after the event. He must have done something right.

      • JackieM

        Press does not equal “did something right”. If you follow that logic, you believe Adam Lambert did right by sticking his tongue down his guitarist’s throat and flipping off the audience at the AMA’s, Chris Brown did right by beating up Rihanna, etc. People were up in arms and commented a lot in the media because there was something WRONG THERE.
        Ricky was a total jerk the last half of the show. Drinking problem maybe??

      • Walden

        So a comedian making some jokes that made a few celebrities a bit uncomfortable is the same to you as a man viciously beating a woman?
        You’re a strange one Jackie, that’s for sure. I haven’t seen the performance, but I will make a point of it now. So if getting me to watch a show I would ordinarily have zero interest in can be considered ‘doing something right’, then he must have done something right. Wait, don’t tell me, watching it would be the same as beating my wife. *shakes head*

      • BLT

        JackieM…i don’t follow you. What does Chris Brown have to do with Gervais and the Golden Globes? And, Adam Lambert?! What does he have to do with Brown or Gervais?

        I don’t follow your logic.

      • Miss Talk

        @JackieM : I’m missing something. Did the Chris Brown/Rihanna thing happened live on TV? What does it have to do in your point?
        The press is talking about Ricky Gervais ‘s performance clearly because this was the HIGHLIGHT of the cough*snoozefest*cough show. I’m usually a sucker for big awards shows but I had no interest for the GG this year. I knew Chris Colfer Christian Bale , Nathalie Portman and Colin Firth were mortal locks. Let’s face it, the competition this year is pretty boring. Last year at this same date, Glee, Modern Family, Avatar, Hurt Locker, Precious were making all the buzz.
        I don’t think Ricky Gervais will be back anytime soon – or else, those A-listers might not show up anymore -but I would suggest the HFPA to keep him around, in case the 2012 GG is a snoozefest as well.

    • Liz Lemon

      Agreed. He was hilarious and he didn’t even say anything THAT offensive. The only controversial joke he made was the one about Scientology. Other than that…I think he could have gone a bit further. I loved every minute of it. I’m sick of all the cheesy/lame/stupid jokes other hosts use. They’re repetitive and old. He did something new and I loved it.

    • Leo

      Jennifer Lopez was on Ellen today and she said that the reason the audience was so quiet is cause they were scared – am I on camera? I don’t want so and so to know that I thought that was funny…so they were all looking at each other and paranoid at who was watching and who Ricky would talk about next.

      • A

        That reminds me: remember at the Globes a couple years ago, Sacha Baron Cohen was on stage as a presenter. He made a joke about Madonna (can’t remember what exactly, but it had something to do with her divorce from Guy Ritchie). Most of the audience wasn’t too pleased. Except when they cut to Salma Hayek (who, like most, didn’t seem pleased), you could spot Drew Barrymore in the background laughing her a** off. It was pretty awesome lol.

      • Miss Talk

        But in that case, Sacha and Madonna are good friends he appeared in the “Music” video. We can assume they were still good after that.
        Ricky Gervais picked out random people. I mean Hugh Hefner The Walking Dead? LOL That was really brave.

    • ann_p

      i really dont gete this whole thing. this is america isnt it? the same america who LOVES shows like jersey shore and the myriad of housewives shows, where they are not only meaner than gervais, they engage in criminal activity and you all love it. but along comes a brit who lives here now, tells a few jokes and people are going nuts? what a mess of ridiculous hypocrisy the usa has become. no wonder we are the laughing stock of the planet.

      • AuntSassy

        I agree. The same people bashing Gervais are the ones that scream and yell about Palin and her right to free speech. This country is FULL to the rim with hypocrits who are too stupid to realize that they are hypocrits.

      • cee

        couldn’t have said it better myself.

  • rich

    Thats a shame..maybe next year they should try someone tamer like Kathy Giffin :)…

  • e4ia

    I keep hearing that he “made fun of Scientology”. He did not. He was making a reference to Tom Cruise and John Travolta who have been hounded by rumors of being gay for years (including Carrie Fisher “outing” Travolta in an interview recently). But to avoid getting sued for calling them out by name, he referred to them as well-known Scientologists knowing that everyone would know who he was talking about.

    • A

      Agreed. I don’t know why people keep claiming that he attacked Scientology. He did not.

    • Brea

      Agreed. Not a Scientology joke. Or an anti-gay joke as some have claimed.

      • minty the candy cane

        Exactly! In fact, it was more or less a rehashing of jokes we’ve all been making for years! (or do I need to host a screening of South Park’s epic “trapped in the closet” homage for everyone?)

  • javi

    i thought he was awesomely hilarious better than any actual comedian if the people at the globes meaning if the producers want a host than can carry 6.4 million vewers or more get some one funnier than gervais i doubt there are any one funnier than him in my mind conan could host or the can ask russel brand if they want another brit to host.

  • Alli

    I thought RG was BRILLIANT!!!!

  • harry

    King Ricky!!

  • Bette

    If Ricky Gervais does go 3 for 3 next year, I am sure a lot of the A listers will stay away in droves. The image conscious actors have been taking themselves way too seriously and when Ricky showed what was really underneath the facade, it was fantastic. Bravo !

    • Buffy Freak

      Sorry but there is no way these ego-centric celebs would stay away. If there is a chance of getting an award or being on TV or getting their picture taken in an expensive gown, they’d show up if Hitler was hosting.

      • anonymous

        Ah, right. Maybe Mel Gibson.

      • Voodoo

        Hitler hosting. Now THAT would be interesting.

  • Randy Shabro

    Actualy, I saw him n a commerical prior to the Golden Globes where he said he was surprised they invited him back this year and he was going to make sure (do a “proper job”) they didn’t invite him back next year! So, he kep to his word. It was crude, but really the Hollywood types need it, and of course, even bad press is good press when you need press!

    • Liz Lemon

      I know right…he got his wish. I have a feeling Ricky is estactic about this news. No other host will be able to top him. I loathe seeing what Anne Hathaway and James Franco do at the Oscars. There’s no way they’re brave enough to do what Ricky did.
      The only person I think can top Ricky if they did go with another GG host is maybe Robert Downey, Jr. He’s hilarious.

  • LH

    RG was terrific!! I thoroughly enjoyed it. Hope he does go 3 for 3 next year.

  • Briony

    He put some of these arrogant stars in their place. I love it. It’s just a silly award show. These actors get up their cry aftera win, like they’ve done something amazing, like find the cure for cancer. Many take them selves way too seriously and Gervais just took them down a notch. Well, done!! He’s hilarious. He should host the Oscars next year!!

  • Buffy Freak

    This has to be the most overblown entertainment story in a long, long time…

    • Lola

      I’ll second that.

  • Logic

    Much ado about nothing…

  • Ray

    PLEASE EXPLAIN THE LANGE/COLBERT Scale!!! I don’t see how you wrote the article using this as your basis and then didn’t explain it. Or, wait is this just a big joke and there is actually no such silly scale. Are you in turn making fun of the idea of ratings and how networks base their entire advertising on these arbitrary numbers which are a poor basis for real critical conversations about content and viewership. Too much?

  • ichorwhip

    He was lame. Using tired old insult jokes is like reusing toilet paper.

  • Drone

    Er… isn’t it “cojones”?

    • Chinita

      Thank you, Drone! It IS “cojones”, which roughly translated, means balls in Spanish. Seeing it misspelled is like nails on a chalkboard. Mr. Labrecque, PLEASE correct your article!

      • Landylan

        Oh yeah, couldn’t have describe it any better. Seen that word misspelled makes me think that the writers don’t even take the time to make sure that words they use are spelled correctly.
        And Mr. Labrecque, cajones means big boxes or big drawers. See no relation what so ever to cojones, which is one of the reasons why it is so annoying seen that word misspelled.
        As for comments on the article, I think Ricky Gervais did an excellent job hosting the Golden Globes, it’s fun to watch the other actors react to his comments. :)

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