Image Credit: James Fisher(2)Rough estimates indicate that there are an estimated 547,000 characters who are considered “X-Men.” I am not effing with you. (And that doesn’t count future selves, alternate-reality duplicates, and omniscient trans-universal bird clones.) And X-Men fight each other all the time: because of mind control, because of puberty, or because they just plain don’t like each other. None of the fights are ever particularly decisive — they’re a family, after all — but it still takes some serious mojo for Ryan Reynolds to unilaterally announce that Deadpool could kick Wolverine’s shiny adamantium butt. After all, unless I’m forgetting anything, Deadpool has fought Wolverine in comic books, movies, and television, and always lost. (Although who ever really loses when both characters can heal from decapitation?) Still, Reynolds’ cheerleading can’t help but make you wonder: Which X-Man would stand triumphant in a knock-down drag-out fight?
You may disagree, but I think this comes down to three contenders whose powers are not based on line-of-sight (to counter telepathy): Storm, because her powers don’t require line-of-sight, and she could just create absolute environmental chaos; Multiple Man, because he’s an army unto himself; and Nightcrawler, because he can keep teleporting constantly and sneak-attack anyone. I envision Storm drowning out the entire country in a massive tsunami/tornado/hurricane/volcano attack. Multiple Man would stay afloat by making ships out of his dead clone-bodies and ultimately drowning Storm in Madrox corpses. Finally, Nightcrawler would bamf-attack his way through every Multiple duplicate until he got the final guy. Nightcrawler victorious! (Of course, centuries later, Wolverine would probably swim to the surface of the now-flooded Earth. Because Wolverine is awesome.)
PopWatchers, who do you think is the Ultimate X-Man? Any Cyclops fans want to make an argument for why Scott Summers wouldn’t go out in the first round? Is it weird that I want Maggot to win everything? His power is that he has worms digest things for him! Why isn’t there a spin-off yet!
Wow… this is like a glimpse inside the mind of a 14 year old geek. Congrats Darren… you’ve accomplished something most men past the age of maturity would not be able to do.
Untrue. I have found my mutant power is to revert back to the mental age of 14 on a whim. I think most men carry this ability as well.
While i can see the logic in your argument, clearly the correct answer is Jean Grey as Phoenix. She can create black holes and literally drain the life force from you. Plus she totally rules and is maybe the coolest character ever created!
When I played this one X-Men video game, I’d always choose Phoenix. You’re right, she totally rules!
Jean Grey/Phoenix was my favorite character in the 90s X-men cartoon. She got even more awesome when she became Dark Phoenix.
Best X-Man ever! She’s of of the most powerful mutants. No contest.
wasnt it proposed at one time by stan lee that if he was prepared for a fight, the hulk would beat anyone cause every time he gets beat down it makes him larger and more powerful?
oh. my friend just told me that the hulk was an avenger not an x man. nevermind
Lol. Yeah Hulk is in many ways unbeatable because he gets stronger the madder he gets and the more he gets beat down. There used to be a limit even to that but since Planet hulk i think it’s pretty endless again.
Oh dear, still a comic book geek at my age!
Cyclops would easily last three rounds, he is a strategic genius! I think Emma would win, she would just turn to diamond wait for everybody else to kill each other then bitch slap whoever is left into oblivion.
That Wolverine mental image is hilarious…yup, just him, left alone on an abandoned Earth, older and more crotchety than ever, floating on a piece of debris, and reaching into the water and grabbing an unopened beer can just happening to float by.
Let’s get it straight: Hulk is the most powerful non-God in Marvel because his strength is infinite.
As for mutants, don’t forget Magneto, who could simply remove the adamantium skeleton from Wolverine or just turn the minerals in your bloodstream into spikes that would kill you from the inside. I always made up the concept of “Marvel Extremes” in my mind, comics where the heroes and villains used their powers to their realities; Magneto always turns out to be the most efficiently deadly.
i know very little about comic books but i do know that the hulk beat thor at least once [well he beat thor into a pulp, got bored and lept away] so hulk can beoome more powerful than a god.
Yeah that mineral control thing of Magneto’s is garbage; I thought they’d ret-conned it out?
My money is on Prof. Xavier. If he taught Jean Grey, I’m sure he has some tricks up his sleeve that he didn’t pass along.
Magneto. When he taps into the electro-magnetic feild of the earth, all things are merely his puppets. He could raise all of New York off the earth, mash it into a ball, and hurl it at L.A. if he wanted.
Wow, scary image there! You make a good point. Since Phoenix is out of the vote, then I’m giving mine to Magneto.
I would say Storm because she can control the weather, she can just increase the rate of global warming and destroy the world.
There is not a wet vagina anywhere near this conversation.
LOL. Let’s be clear, I’m not addressing the, um, specifics of your post, but rather the general meaning – and you’re quite wrong. I find guys geeking out to be a huge turn-on (I married a superhero nerd, and I love when Darren Franich does this kind of article). And I never even cared about superheroes until I started learning about them from said husband (back when he was my boyfriend). Plus, a discussion of X-Men always creates the possibility of a Gambit shout-out, and there aren’t too many sexier mutants than Gambit. (Even if he’d never last long against some of the more powerful mutants…)
Mmm, Gambit..uh, yeah, I agree with everything you said!
I agree as well. Gambit is the tastiest of the bunch even if he’d get his Cajun a$$ kicked in an all out battle. And some girls not only enjoy watching these little geekboy spats, we can hold are own in the discussion.
And I’d go with Professor X. He didn’t train all those mutants and keep Jean/Pheonix under control without learning a thing or two.
In order to judge this contest, I’m going to need Ryan Reynolds and Hugh Jackman wet and shirtless.
There ya go, Me.
That is the best thing I’ve heard all day.
We all win in that case!
I think the real fight is between Jean Grey and Professor X.
Jean Grey b/c Phoenix is awesome.
Professor X b/c he contained the Phoenix in Jean’s head for all those years
Phoenix is the only right answer. But in a pinch I’d also stay in Polaris’ corner.
Rogue, no question.
I agree. I mean she could just steal every one elses powers and kick their trash.
Professor X, easy.