Image Credit: Todd Williamson/FilmMagic, George Napolitano/FilmMagic, Alberto E. Rodriguez/Getty ImagesAnother week, another round of American Idol judges’ table rumors. People.com reported yesterday that (le gasp!) Jennifer Lopez’s much-buzzed-about deal with the show might’ve fallen through. Kara DioGuardi’s dad told Capitol Tonight (file this news using the oh-no-they-did-NOT tab!) that his daughter heard her neck was on the chopping block via media reports only. And Nick Cannon got a little loose-lipped with the Hollywood Reporter and declared that his wife Mariah Carey “would love to” be the next Simon Cowell. (Reps for Fox and FremantleMedia declined to comment on these stories; reps for Lopez, DioGuardi, and Carey did not respond to EW’s interview requests.) But an Idol insider tells me the only thing certain is that Fox is loving the 24/7 cycle of media speculation about a show that’ll enter its tenth season in January 2011. “It’s the perfect position to be in,” says my source, who wouldn’t be surprised if Fox waits till the end of the month to make an announcement about which celebs will play the roles of Randy-Paula-Simon for a new generation of Idoloonies.
But hey, if speculation is what Idol wants, who am I to deny ‘em? I already yapped incessantly about J.Lo (I think she could be an awesome choice — if she learns from Ellen DeGeneres’ mistakes) and Kara the (Formerly) Terrible (this is how Fox thanks arguably the most astute voice on the season 9 panel?), but what about the woman whose “We Belong Together” is a staple on my iPod?
When I first read the Mariah-as-Idol-judge proposition, my mind went completely blank — and stayed that way for hours — which I guess says a lot in and of itself. (Or maybe my brain is fried from considering Chris Isaak, Shania Twain, Bret Michaels, etc.) I mean, yes, Mariah’s sneezes have more vocal authenticity than J.Lo’s entire musical oeuvre, and yes her season 7 mentor stint resulted in a night of fantastic performances (remember David Cook’s “Always Be My Baby” or Jason Castro’s “I Don’t Want to Cry”?), but it’s hard to envision the sometimes, er, spacey diva offering tough, lucid critiques in a live TV setting. Isn’t she just too nice for the gig? Then, this morning, it struck me: Idol producers could devise a wordless critique system in which Mariah judges the performances by holding up one (or more) in a series of eight flash-cards: Unicorn, sparkles, rainbow, butterfly, lamb, cotton candy, negligee, and sad clown. What would it all mean? Who cares! From a TV theater standpoint, it would be kind of amazing, and at the very least, more succinct than a Randy Jackson riff. In other words, J.Lo, Kara, or Mariah…I could learn to live with any one of ‘em. Perhaps even more than one of ‘em. But while Fox suits are still brainstorming in the boardroom, we might as well put it to an official vote, no? Who knows, maybe Nigel Lythgoe and Cecile Frot-Coutaz are rabid EW.com readers and value our opinions. (I’ll pause here so we can all laugh it out.) Vote below, then head down to the comments with your own left-field picks for Idol judge!
As much as it pains me to admit it, I think Kara deserves to stick around. She was the most lucid on the panel, and at least she’s got current experience (and a record of success) in the pop music world.
Still think J. Lo would be a nice addition, but I doubt FOX and ‘Idol’ producers will ever have two women on a three-person panel.
I’ll take Mariah or Jennifer, but NOT Kara!!!
Definitely Mariah
I pick Jennifer, she has the good experience for this.
Of course, by your definition, Slezak.. MAriah would be the perfect match for the “Paula” seat… she would provide hours of water cooler fodder and an occasion lucid moment of recognizing genius early on (ala Paula’s spot on opinion of Adam Lambert)….
I don’t want any of those girls to be a judge. I want someone like Rihanna to be a judge, someone with real talent.
Kara – Knows a bit about music, but gives contradictory advice to performers. Is irritating. Is flamingly biased for or against certain performers. From audience feedback polls, she is ratings poison – not entertaining, full of herself. Had bad chemistry with other judges.
It’s a big world out there. Randy is staying, but why not look around at the hundreds of people who would be a better fit on Idol than Dioguardi?
And only one celeb at the table of THREE judges, please!!
I agree – I doubt they’d have two women out of three judges, but whatever. I think Kara should stay mainly because she can form a quick opinion and she knows what she’s talking about. Let’s face it – there is a learning curve to being a judge on “live” tv – you have to be quick. So I am forgiving her season 1 and based on season 2 I have every confidence that she would only get better.
Kara’s not quick at all. She takes forever to think, and she talks way too much on the show.
Have you ever heard Mariah or JLo speak? They sound like MORONS. Although it really pains me to say this, Kara speaks better than those two.
PS – GET RID OF RANDY!!! Good lord – how can Nigel or any of the other producers seriously claim that he adds any value to this show? He doesn’t. He is as useless as Paula was and needs to be replaced ASAP.
I would love Jennifer Lopez — but I have to agree that Kara should remain a judge, i was not a fan of her in her first year — but if she is not there — there is no one else who will give anything constructive. Hey, Dawg, i’m looking at you.
The people that they put there, will give a lot more constructive advice than kara. I’m so sick of you people acting like she’s a genius, when the truth is that she is just so lost.
Ugh! Just say no to Kara. Bleh.
Won’t watch if Mimi is on. Would love to see Cher or Billy Joel on board.
Kara is easily the most qualified and capable. They’d be foolish to lose her. (What, exactly, qualifies RANDY?)
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Uh, wrong site sport-tard.
Mariah Carey would be the best choice! Her celebrity alone would send ratings thru the roof. Besides she is the greatest vocalist of our generation.
are you drunk??
This is NOT me^ I have been posting here a long time, I would not reply that way, just for the record!
It’s Randy.
Mariah usually is…
I could see Mariah still doing this for a while. It’s a good thing for her.
Mariah would be a better choice than J-Lo and Paula since she’s the best singer and writes songs. She’s wacky like Paula and I wonder if she could be honest with people like Kara. So, of these choices Kara should win because at least she isn’t afraid to tell someone who stinks that they stink. Mariah would probably just call them her “lambs.” Oy.
Ya right, Kara has even faked that someone stinks, just to make herself seem smart and great. Kara is a lousy judge!!!
you are 110% correct. mimi is gonna create millions of new viewers that respect her views
The 8 flashcards – hilarious!!! I love it!!!
I agreed..
“What would it all mean? Who Cares!” hahahahaha
Agreed.
“What would it all mean? Who cares!”.. hahahaha – priceless.
I think I would give Kara another shot. Yes she can be annoying most the times but she is the only kid-of-reasonable voice left on that panel.
Testing! My last comment did not post:(
I would have wanted J Lo despite not caring for her personally. To me she seemed like a bit of a, you know, ahem, pain to say the least, but that would have worked well on a panel without Simon. Now that J. Lo’s apparently out, grudgingly Kara makes the best choice.
Mariah is a real talent, I dont see her doing this. She actually has a career.
Kara / Shania (or Mariah) / Harry Connick. That’s what I want.
The 8 flashcards! Hahaha, Still laughing, OMG! Soo true… MARIAH AS A JUDGE? It just hurts thinking about it. Too diva, too drama queen, too arrogant, too ice-lady… No, No, NO
If you read TMZ.com Shania Twain is the Plan B if it’s not Jennifer Lopez. I don’t think Mariah is even in consideration. And I don’t think she is right. Even though she was an decent mentor. I think Shania would be much better…
I can’t believe people want Kara to stick around. She is so annoying to watch it is painful. Also, she inserts this element of judgmental criticism that just sucks the soul out of any performances. Simon, for all his scripted nastiness, did not render the performances shlock. She is extremely off putting and I am not sure Idol has enough pluses in the other column to offset her negative influence. Must give her props though, she has sucked up to all the Idol media critics and gotten them much more on her side. Good politics on her part.
Kara made sense more often than not this season. And we know she has the guts to offer up stern critiques. As much as I used to loath her, I’m on Team DioGuardi. Although I think Mariah would make for an excellent Paula/Crazy panelist.
My dream panel would be Elton/Kara/Shania. If there must be a fourth, I’d like it to be a non-celebrity producer like Greg Wells.
Let me see- pop tart Mariah, stuck-up J Lo, or down to earth Kara? I vote for Kara!
Fake Kara is what she is, fake people are not down to earth.