ABC’s True Beauty continues to teach me important life lessons on how to be a good person. Help people look for their phantom lost jewelry (which I would do anyway because they’d be hidden gems). Do not accept free vests from salesgirls who really want to give them to me. Never peek at the contents of an envelope in an elevator that seems private, because chances are a merry band of Oompa Loompas — Vanessa Minnillo, Carson Kressley, and Beth Ostrosky Stern — are watching me. They are watching, and they care. It’s their life’s work. Anyway, last night’s episode, “Bride in Trouble,” totally threw me for a loop!
During this week’s Inner Beauty challenge, the “Beauties” had to earn the chance to stand in the weddings of complete strangers based on short speeches along the lines of “I like puppies and kittens” (Erica), “I’m here from Canada” (Craig), and “I love to travel” (Amy). Then, as the “Beauties” changed into bridesmaid and groomsmen outfits in private dressing rooms, a “mother” berated her “daughter” in the town square of the bridal boutique. The “mom” kept calling the “daughter” fat and complaining that her dress didn’t fit. According to a plane of logic that exists only on this show, the “Beauties” would PASS if they cut the tension with a supportive comment in favor of the “daughter,” but if they minded their own business they would FAIL.
I am 95 percent sure that, if thrown into this situation, I wouldn’t say anything to either woman. Would you? Am I a bad person or just not a true beauty?! Maybe, maybe, I would hurl a bitchy comment to both women as I huffed out of there — probably “Shut up” to the Momzilla and “Size up” to the Bride. I feel like both of those comments would help. This is why I could never win a ridiculous reality show. It is one of about a billion reasons, including the small stipulation that I would also never try out!
In the end, Michelle went home because dear, insecure, utterly stupid Amy keeps coming up with such tremendous lines. My favorite was right after she learned that Michelle would be going home: “Home as in Planet Hollywood, or home as in home?” This gem was closely followed by her terrified inquiry just before the wedding chapel challenge. “Are we getting married? Do we have to marry each other?” They should have let her continue to speak because I really wanted to hear what I suspect would have been her next question: “Do we have to have each other’s babies?” Yes, Amy. Next week! On True Beauty….
Who else watched this mess? Would you have butted in to tell the “daughter” she was lovely? And was this week’s True Beauty an even bigger trainwreck than Vienna’s meltdown in the face of Jake, who seems like one of those scary John Stamos Lifetime husbands? I say it was not!
Annie on Twitter: @EWAnnieBarrett
I wouldn’t mind Criag or Taylor walking around naked and changing in front of me all the time… I’m just sayin’
I wouldn’t mind them doing that either. Really the whole show could have been them dropping their pants all night. LOL
I’m officially in love with Taylor, I don’t care if he never comes out of the closet. (Tho Craig’s bod… whoa, hello!)
Agree! (just don’t tell my husband!)
Don’t call Beth Stern an oompa loompa. She is cool. She isn’t a famewhore and gives all her salary to Northshore Animal League. She is a very nice person.
She is a great person! She’s still bright orange. Most reality show creatures are at this point.
She looked great in the wedding dress -nice hair and makeup. The makeup they put on her is so dark and heavy – ugh! It often clashes with her outfits. She looked so fresh and light in the wedding dress with the softer make up.
The make up on Beth is horrendous She’s really soft and very pretty & they make her look so hard, and really awful !
the most hilarious thing about this show is when Vanessa Minnillo walks out at the end expecting shocked recognition from the booted contestant, only to get nothing but a blank stare coming back from them. Hah!
LOL! So agree. It’s the part I wait for every week and probably the main reason I even tune in, now.
I love it too! The big “reveal” of Vanessa (who??), that she’s also been judging (gasp!!) means nothing to anyone (including us!!).
I know, I’m still trying to figure out who she is (and why I should care). It isn’t like she’s showing up in disguises in each episode. I think it would be far more dramatic if the actors that were part of the test were the big reveal.
I concur, also. I’ve (sadly) watched every ep from both seasons and still last night found myself struggling to even remember Vanessa’s name. (Kept thinking Maria Menounos, but knew that was wrong.) I doubt Nick Lachey remembers Vanessa’s name either.
I kept thinking it was Jessica Alba … not Vanessa Manillo! lol
Sara! I LOVE you for saying that! I’ve been thinking the same thing for weeks!! Yo Vanessa, FYI – big reveals only work if people know (and CARE) who you even are!!!
Sara RULES!!!!!!
That’s my favorite part of the show, too, along with Amy’s comments. The rest of the show–well, let’s just say it’s summer and there’s nothing else on.
My absolute favorite part of the show is that Vanessa can’t be shown to the contestants until after they get eliminated. As if these people would really know what was going on if she was the host like last year.
I doubt I would have said anything because I don’t think it’s my place. I might have tried to give the bride an encouraging smile but that’s it. I agree that minding your business isn’t a sign of ugliness. The standards for inner beauty on this show are weird.
Has anyone even heard people having an actual conversation like that in real life?
Um, yes. A friend of mine had me as her personal attendant for her wedding and I got the joy of intercepting a number of comments from her mother about how she needed spanx to really wear her dress and how her back fat stuck out with her dress like that. It was really awkward. So yes, to answer the question in the post, if the bride was my friend, I would tell Mom to shut up and tell Bride that she looked beautiful. But these people weren’t really friends, now were they?
Eww, I was hoping no one was going to answer that. How horrible for the daughter.
I did once. It was on an airplane and the mom and daughter were right across from me. The mom reeked of smoke and weighed like 90 pounds (with 10 lbs of makeup) and she was berating her daughter for “spilling out” over to her seat. The girl was plump but by no means obese. The poor girl was humiliated and there was no where she could go. Everyone could hear her mom’s comments. Anyway, when the mom went to the bathroom, I asked if she was okay and told her “I love your outfit, I think you look great.” AND THE BEST PART, 3 other people around us spoke up (including the cute guy in front of me, which made her smile from ear to ear). En masse, we are sheep, but when one person speaks up, other people are more willing to take a stand.
I was in a very similar situation. I worked at Macys in college and during prom season, some of the moms were down right rule. Honestly, if I told you all the stories, you would be shocked at how mean some moms can be to their own kids. In my 3 years working there, I had to console at least 20 girls after their mother made them cry. I don’t think the test had any thing with butting in to someone’s business, it was about being compassionate to someone in hard situation.
I would have given the mom a dirty look, and I MIGHT have said something to the bride about how the color of her dress was so good for her, or something a LITTLE encouraging. Wouldn’t have gotten into the mom’s face or anything.
I think what Erica said was the best — just reminded the girl that her wedding day was HER day and no one else’s. I think that’s something every bride with an overbearing mom needs to hear at some point!
All that said, I think the premise of that whole “set up” was really condescending — like, the judges wanted to see how the contestants deal with “the little people,” i.e., “the not-as-attractive people.”
I agree! It’s just reinforcing the fact that these “beautiful people” need to stick up for and encourage the rest of us!
so true beauty comes only … when you are on a candid camera type of show – wow how shallow the american people have become – to get your reinforcement of good-ness via a tv show…
sweetie, if you think anyone takes this show seriously you are very confused.
I agree! A very uncomfortable situation all around! I was very impressed with Erika, but a little disappointed with Taylor just laughing. I kinda expected him to pass…sigh
I have to say, that while this show is pretty entertaining, some of the “tests” are a bit weak.
And I think you left out Amy’s line which she sobbed after failing the challenge: “I never thought I’d be so miserably bad at something!” She’s my fave though.
Last night’s hidden challenge bothered me too. You just never know how strangers will react to someone they don’t know talking to them during a tense moment. I thought Craig handled it well by just saying “that dress looks beautiful on you” and Erica did a great job of talking to the bride, but I don’t think that Amy and Michelle were insensitive by not saying something to her. I just think they were uncomfortable and didn’t know what to say. When my oldest daughter (now 17 years old) was just a 3 month old infant, I was meeting a friend with her toddler son at the zoo, and I saw a lady beating her 10-year-old daughter because the girl had wandered off. I kept staring at the lady, frozen, not knowing what to say and whether she would come after me and my baby if I did say something. The lady saw me, stopped hitting her child, then drug her around to the back of a building and started doing it again. I’v had nightmares about that incidient.
Another thing about the challenge last night, you never know how people are going to react because that was a larger sized actor playing the bride and all the 3 female contestants look to be petite sized. You don’t want to look condescending either if you say something.
I think that the only person who “failed” was Taylor because it’s one thing to “mind your own business” and quite another to laugh at someone else’s misery.
Amy’s such a squinchy-faced sourpuss, she had no right being kept on. She’s more like the face of kaopectate.
She is so ugly. That mouth and teeth – YIKES!!!!
I don’t see how she got on this show with those teeth. I guess they just didn’t have enough tryouts?
I was a bit mean saying Amy is so ugly, but she is just not attractive and her stupidity and whininess (sp?) have a lot to do with that. Ericka, however is gorgeous!
I actually liked Michelle – she seemed like a nice person, I felt bad the show made her feel like an awful person.
I think it was the right decision but her send off shows what a nice person she is. You could tell she really felt bad when they showed her clips (the few that existed).
Me too. I think the tests that she failed were just minor stuff.
I mean they shouldn’t have been so harsh on her like that. She passed so many other tests. Give her some credit for that.
Michelle got a raw deal. She seemed like a total sweetie who got edited to look more nasty to justify keeping Amy.
Amy has no fortitude, she’s no Face of Vegas or a contestant for this show, she has to be in the Top Ten of reality whiners. I definitly would have said something reassuring to the teary bride.
I love this show BUT there are lots of instances of the contestants “lacking true inner beauty” that are really just them being human and normal! As if Vanessa or Carson has NEVER trash-talked someone behind his or her back!! If everyone in this world lived up to Vanessa’s idea of “true beauty” it would be the most *boring* place ever…seriously, trash-talking has been a main-stay of female bonding since (probably) the dawn of time! We need to vent!!
Having said that, I felt sorry for Michelle – I think she probably is a pretty nice person in real life. A little vain maybe, but she’s only 22, and she wasn’t as psycho or overtly self-absorbed as someone like Liz.
The fatal flaw with this show is the casting dilemma they must face: they could easily stock the suite with 10 Liz-style reality TV fame-whores, but nobody would be able to win, as they would be nasty all the time. BUT they also need to collect footage of everyone being “ugly” for when they get voted off. PLUS they want to keep the Liz-types around for as long as possible, as they are far more entertaining to watch than a house full of goody-goody types would be.
I have to agree with you about the tests on this show being questionable. I consider myself a nice person and I like to try to help people when I can. In the first challenge, the woman at the store was basically begging them to take the stuff, I think she should have been a little less pushy about it. Also, I’m not sure if I would have hugged any stranger on the sidewalk, sweaty or not, because I wouldn’t feel comfortable being a small girl myself. . . And as for the bride challenge, I don’t know if I would have said anything. Some people would be upset if you said anything to them. They might not necessarily be upset with you, but the fact that you had overheard the conversation and might snap back at you instead. I probably would have given a smile, but I’m honestly not sure if I would have said anything encouraging.
I agree re the “tests”. I would have failed the woman on the phone test (“get off the phone and sort out your own damn dog…”), and I would have struggled with letting a sweating fat guy hug me (and I suspect most of us). I probably wouldn’t have accused the florist of trying to help me cheat and I would quite possibly have left the poor bride to her dignity. I don’t think I’m a bad person. Finally, I am terrified to find myself agreeing with Liz (last week’s expellee) when she said that the show would be worse off without her. She was barking, she was utterly devoid of moral fibre but hell, she was entertaining.