Superman might visit your hometown, unless you live in the South

supermanImage Credit: DC ComicsSooner or later, all great men take a road trip across America. John Steinbeck. Lewis & Clark. The dudes in Easy Rider. Forrest Gump. And now, the Last Son of Krypton. Today, the 700th issue of Superman hits stores, beginning a year-long storyline called “Grounded,” in which the superhero will walk from sea to shining sea. But wait, there’s a meta-twist! According to DC’s website, Superman might visit your town. All you have to do is write an essay “describing why Superman should visit.” I assume he’ll only do so in the comic book and not in real life, but hey, who knows what kind of contract Brandon Routh signed?

Unfortunately, Superman’s travel plans are pretty set in stone at this point: beginning in Philadelphia, Penn., he visits Chicago, Ill., Des Moines, Iowa, Omaha, Neb., Denver, Colo., Salt Lake City, Utah, Las Vegas, Nev., Los Angeles, Portland, Ore., and Seattle, Wash. (Yeesh, Supes really likes the Pacific Northwest. Guess he must prefer coffee to mint juleps. Or maybe he just really wants to go skiing? Err, super-skiing?) The essays are supposed to be 75-1,000 words. Here is my humble plea:

Dear Mr. Superman,

I’m not going to ask you to visit me here in New York, since you live in Metropolis, which is basically just New York sans Brooklyn, the Bronx, Queens, Staten Island, and Manhattan above midtown. But please, oh please, couldn’t find it in your heart to visit San Francisco, my old hometown? SF hasn’t had a good superhero since Joe Montana went to Kansas City. (The X-Men moved out there, but they live in Marin – bridge and tunnel alert!) You could compete with Mayor Gavin Newsom in a contest to see whose hair is more indestructible. And we could all learn a valuable lesson about gay marriage, or the Internet, or something. Plus: the Golden Gate Bridge! Come on, you don’t really want to go to Los Angeles, do you? All L.A. has to offer is beautiful people, sunshine, and happiness. Lamezors!

XOXO,

Darren

PopWatchers, do you want Superman to visit your town? Why or why not? And seriously, he’s not even going to stop over in Kansas to say hi to the ol’ gang in Smallville? Who does this guy think he is?

Comments (22 total) Add your comment
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  • ObiHave

    Dear Lex Luthor,
    On Superman’s latest potential itinerary he failed to list any Southern cities. We would like to invite you to set up shop in one of our fine cities in the South…unless you’re too busy running WalMart.

    • Castiella

      Yes, Lex, Dallas/Fort Worth would love to have you. Especially if you’re being played by Michael Rosenbaum.

      • J Law

        As a long-time Smallville fan, I just couldn’t see Rosenbaum in the tights and cape.

  • V

    Umm…There are only two cities in the Pacific Northwest listed. And the skiing is probably better in Denver and Salt Lake City (which are neither Pacific nor Northwest).

    If he’s already coming to Portland, I’m not going to ask for anything…I already got it. =D

  • Joe

    Does Darren know what the Pacific Northwest is? Because there are only two cities listed above that would be considered Pacific Northewest cities, but I guess two means alot to him?

  • MWC

    Dear Superman,
    Can you come to Baltimore and bat clean-up for the Orioles? Cuz man we stink.

  • Eyeball

    Superman is coming to Portland? That’s not nearly as exciting as having Special Agent Dale Cooper in town last week.

  • Chaz Winterbottom

    Is this idea really going to fly?

    • Castiella

      No, apparently it’s going to walk.

  • RP

    Is he literally grounded and can’t fly? If that’s the case I won’t hold it against him that he won’t make a detour through the South if the west coast is his goal.

  • Myrna Loy

    I’m seconding Darren’s plea for San Francisco. I would like to see Superman stop a runaway cable car with his bare hands. Also I’d like to see Clark Kent have to duck into a leather bar to turn into Superman. Thank You.

  • BlackIrish4094

    Metropolis is also supposed to be Chicago, Gotham is supposed to be the comic version of NY.

    • Aliza

      which is funny, since Chicago has the corruption of Gotham and the two latest Bat movies were filmed there. I go to school in Chi-town and I call it Gotham

      • wpd

        Over the years I’ve heard mostly (from DC creators) Metropolis = NY and Gotham = Chicago. But then they’ve also sometimes been shown to be connected via bridges, so the above comparisons don’t work. And since both are fictional anyway they can be whichever you want in your own mind.

    • Alex

      In the Smallville universe, Metropolis is within driving distance (though no one’s quite sure how far) of Smallville, in Kansas. So that might confuse the theory that Metropolis is either New York or Chicago even further.

      It doesn’t really matter since they’re both fictional places, but in my mind Metropolis was always New York and Gotham was Chicago.

    • Kristen

      Metropolis is south of Chicago, actually closer to Cairo (IL, so it’s pronounced KAY-ro). It would be great if Supe would visit the town that already has a statue and museum!!

  • gigi

    Maybe Superman can make a stop on the Mississippi Gulf Coast. I think he’s the only person who hasn’t been consulted to stop the leak and clean up the place.

  • Alex

    I’ll take Tom Welling over Brandon Routh…he’s not Superman yet, but he’s pretty close….

  • Kimber

    Great show and sugardaddiesmatchmaker

  • Julian

    I sure would love to meet Superman aka Brandon Routh in person!

  • Stacey

    Ha ha. My girlfriend actually did meet Tom Welling at LAX. She said it was all she could do not to fall into hysterics or drool. LOL. She also said he was surprisingly tall. Well that’s my only meet Superman story :)

    • Mary

      IT’s well known that Welling is a giant. He’s at least 6’3” and several people have said he’s closer to 6’4” or 6’5”. He’s easily the most gorgeous man on the planet.

      As for Superman….I’m really getting tired of him missing in action from his life as Clark Kent. I doubt I’ll buy a comic again until he’s back at the Daily Planet with his friends and his wife.

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