'Celebrity Apprentice': Eric Trump's sinister debut

Eric Trump, giant son of Donald, lion-like brother of Ivanka, guest-starred on his first Celebrity Apprentice last night. At 6 ft. 5 inches, the 26-year-old Executive VP and possible vampire is the tallest in the family. As EW’s Dalton Ross, the person who cares the most about Celebrity Apprentice in this universe, wrote directly to Eric Trump in his recap: “I had no idea your father had sired a giant. But what struck me most was not your freakish height, but rather the way you continually kept bringing your hands in front of you and tapping the fingers together like a maniacal Ernst Stavro Blofeld.”

Indeed, Eric Trump could huff and puff and blowwwwww your remaining Celebrity Apprentice contestants out of the studio! We’re not saying he will crush them. We’re merely marveling at the ease with which he could. Here’s how we see it playing out. Timber!

  • Holly: Eric would tragically lose his balance around her (preferably when she’s “laying down tracks” at a recording studio)
  • Maria: Blow-dryer war; settled within seconds
  • Curtis: “sitting pretty” staring contest
  • Bret: Those aforementioned constantly tapping fingers would only need to nestle themselves a few feet within Bret’s weave to wreak pure havoc. Once the fluttering knockwursts found themselves attracted to the rocker’s latest “blue raspberry jam” head scarf, forget it. Eric likes beautiful things. Look at him. He’s delighted.
  • Sharon: tragic 240-degree swing of the left arm
  • Cyndi: friendly pat on the head (Ivanka aiming aerosol hairspray from her own boardroom seat, but dude, Ivanka, you’re not helping, Eric’s got this)

*
Then he’d race to find Selita Ebanks sitting calmly at her laptop, having just tweeted “Hahaha” in response to @doobieman21’s observation that “don’t donald trump son eric look like a #2 pencil! while he sittin up there snitchin’ on holly! lol.” And it would be bye-bye to Selita, then, too.


Annie on Twitter: @EWAnnieBarrett

Comments (26 total) Add your comment
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  • annie

    He’s kinda fug.

    • bet

      agreed GROSS

  • Sarah

    My husband commented that he looks like a vampire.

  • Karen

    So that was a different son last night- I thought it as the same son that’s usually on- we just thought he had bleached his hair!

  • AD

    Erik was scarry looking; unadolturated arrogance. I thought the other son was bad; this guy is a caricature of his father’s pomposity (without the years of experience to back it up).

  • Brian

    How has science not dissected the Trump men yet to discover what clearly has to be a gene for bad hairstyles. Think of all of the suffering in the world (like, mine for instance) they could cure if they could only learn about the horrible disease that afflicts Donald, Donald Jr. and now Eric.

    • orville

      They must find a cure before the little one hits adolescence.

  • deedee

    he looked like gary busey’s son

  • judy

    he needs a styled hair cut, and a suit that fits better. we all aren’t handsome princes or beauty queens..work with what u have

  • Ambient Lite

    Eeeeevvvillll! He is indeed the epitome of sinister-ness.
    I’m glad someone is confident enough in Bret’s prognosis to go on making fun of his weave/bandanna…I guess.

  • tammy

    I don’t believe there is another son old enough. I believe it is Don, Jr with dyed Blonde hair. A bad dye job. So my advise tell whoever that was to dye his hair back to dark brown/black.

  • Angela

    He couldn’t have been more than 15-16 yrs old when in an interview along with his older brother and sister he said that he was looking forward to the day that the trump name would be on every building in NYC…at that time when I heard that I felt sorry for his arrogance and was hoping he would outgrow it. Apparently he has not.

  • lucy

    I thought his comments in Summers team visit were very Trump like and biting- I think he will do well in anything-I think Donald Jr is softer in his presentation and Eric comes across more like Donald’s toughness-It was nice to see him on the show-And I love Ivanka-She is a lovely fierce, pretty and intelligent woman.I enjoy her comments and interviews she gives-And her books

  • lucy

    I think that Ivanka should have made Peoples Most Beautiful list and “has been” Aniston should not have been on the list-Ivanka has beauty, wit, class and intelligence-Beauty inside and out-
    Jolie made the list and should have-She also has beauty (inside and out)-intelligence-and ddoes things for others constantly-and is a great mother

  • keith

    I couldn’t understand why he criticized by Holly and then later Curtis for “not speaking to me” when he was with them during their challenge. Dude, really? Weren’t they busy? Not speaking to you??? come on, grow up!

  • brian

    his mouth looks like a butthole

  • jam

    I LOVE that, despite all his riches, The Donald couldn’t buy himself better-looking kids. They are all FUG! The ugliest mouths I have ever seen, they look truly deformed.

    And no way is Ivanka attractive. She paid a lot to spruce herself up, but not beautiful by a longshot.

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