The Biggest Loser has arrived on the Wii. You should be skeptical. There’s never been a good videogame based on a TV show (the Simpsons arcade game being the grand exception.) And the Wii has a bad habit of attracting overstretched franchises that use Balance Board Compatibility to cover up shoddy animation and repetitive gameplay (Don King Boxing, anybody? Anybody?) Here’s a few things I learned about the game after a week of yoga, core training, and stretching muscles I didn’t know I had:
1: This videogame is specifically designed for people who have never played videogames. When you point the controller at any part of the menu, trainer Bob Harper reads out the menu item and offers some helpful advice (“Hold the Wii controller over the cursor and tap A to scroll to the year of your birth!”) He does this every time, even with menu items you’ve already pointed at. I couldn’t find any way to turn it off. If you’ve been looking for a videogame that’s user-friendly enough for your deaf great-grandma, this is it, assuming that your deaf great-grandma is totally lame.
2: Jillian Michaels is mostly absent. Her psychologically intense training style (last week, she made three people cry!) rips through the show’s gooey sentimentality. Unfortunately, she’s barely in the game. Even if you choose Jillian as your trainer, Bob will narrate your entire workout. Jillian’s vocal performance is limited to non-specific exhortations like “Beautiful!” “Perfect form!” and “Make me proud!” (No bleeped F-bombs = travesty!) Guess she was too busy focusing on her own Wii Franchise, Jillian Michaels Fitness Ultimatum, which looks kind of like a Lara Croft exercise video.
3: The music is all wrong. The elevator-techno that hums along during the workouts will disappoint fans who are used to the television show’s bombastic, Carmina Burana-meets-Sergio-Leone-plus-exploding-Taiko-drums soundtrack.
4: It doesn’t feel very much like The Biggest Loser. If you’ve never seen the show, then you’re missing out on the most thrilling exploration of human nature on broadcast TV. The show’s warm-fuzzy “Let’s lose weight together!” attitude falls away by the middle of each episode, as elimination draws near. Competitors practically have to stab each other in the back to stay, meaning that the thinner they get, the more morally despicable they become. The Wii game, by comparison, is just candy-colored inspiration-delivery software. There’s a great videogame to be made from The Biggest Loser. This isn’t it, but maybe that’s okay, because…
5: …if all you’re looking for is a workout video with a calorie-loss display, then you’ll be totally satisfied. As Wii Fit proved, exercise is just a little bit more fun when you’re waving around a motion-capture controller. I can honestly say that I burned more calories in ten seconds of playing The Biggest Loser than I have in my entire wasted lifetime of playing every Super Mario Bros., Metal Gear Solid, and Legend of Zelda.
So, The Biggest Loser for the Wii is one of the worst videogames ever, but it might just save your life. Put that on a poster! Loser fans, do you want this game? Loser haters, would you ironically buy this game for your skinny friend’s birthday?
Comments (1-10) of 10 Add your comment
A Biggest loser games – Biggest Winner in money for Wii – look at all the amazing things Wii bowling has done for seniors – Wii Biggest Loser – for those people who want to lose the weight but are so not ready to be publically humiliated with the “WEIGH INS” – BRAVO
This review confirms what I was thinking. From the commercials and videos i’ve seen, it doesn’t look that great, but a step above Jillian’s Ultimatum, which was horrid. Too bad Jillian’s not on this game very much. Sounds like she’s slowly distancing herself from BL in prep for her own show. A friend of mine said she was going to try BL for Wii, I told her she should try the Wii Personal Trainer. Looks like I was right. I love Personal trainer and have toned up quite a bit after a couple of months. I’m so looking forward to the next version coming out in a couple of weeks!! Still love the show though.
Thanks for the reco. I love Wii Fit, but I’m getting bored. I needed a new balance board game.
Do you mean “My Fitness Coach”? There is no Personal Trainer for Wii.
Um…yeah…have you totally missed the point here? First, the Wii is not built for graphics. If you want that, get a Playstation. The Wii’s demo is not the hard core gamer. As for “repetitive game play,” duh, it’s a work out video. What were you expecting? Levels and bosses? This is not an average game. I’m really not sure why any workout game is compared to regular video games. They are not the same. The Wii is made to get people’s behinds off the couch and actually DO something. The graphics are a distant second to that.
I agree, but judging by Tina’s comment, it sounds like there are better workout game products available for Wii.
This review is totally off! I am working out to this game and have gotten great workouts and am definitely building muscle. I love that I can work out different muscle groups. I bought Jillian’s title as well and it’s horrible!
Did you buy Jillian’s 2010 or 2009 title? The 2009 title is known to be horrible, from what I read so far Jillian’s 2010 is actually supposed to be pretty good (but HARD)
There is a Personal Trainer for Wii–it’s by EA Sports. It’s pretty good, actually.
Hi there! Your site iis cool!,