George Clooney tofu: Are you effin' kidding me?

Georgeclooneytofu_l_2Um, come again? PETA, the animal-rights group best known for throwing blood-red paint on the fur-encased Anna Wintours of the world, would like to make a George Clooney-flavored tofu. The name? CloFu. In a letter addressed to the dashing star (who, yesterday, made my Thursday night TV a lot more exciting), PETA explained that they’d got their hands on a gym towel soaked with Clooney’s sweat, and that thanks to some wacky technology, they could harvest said perspiration into something akin to the meat flavoring that turns up in instant gravy. “Of course your fans would swoon at the idea of eating CloFu,” the letter explained. “But what interests us most is that we would attract many people who don’t try tofu because they worry that it would be bland or that they wouldn’t know how to cook it.” Now, I am a vegan-ish vegetarian going on 20-plus years of a meat-free diet, but even I can’t deny that this is a) nothing more than PETA’s latest attempt to grab headlines (mission accomplished!); and b) GROSS! I do not want to eat tofu that is infused with Clooney’s, or for that matter, anyone else’s sweat! I am perfectly happy to keep my tofu in the fridge and my Clooney on the screen. If ne’er the twain shall meet, a happy herbivore shall I be. Thank god Clooney seems to agree. “As a mammal, I am offended,” he said. (Leave it to him to be funny when responding to such ridiculousness.)

What’s your take? Are you as grossed out by PETA’s latest publicity stunt as I am? Or does the idea of throwing a CloFu steak on the grill have you all hot and bothered? If the latter, are there other celebrities whose essence you’d like to see infused into tofu or other forms of mock meat? A little Viggo Tempeh for lunch? How about some Jackman Seitan?

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addCredit(“George Clooney: Paul Morigi/”)

Comments (18 total) Add your comment
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  • Lisa

    Ugh..I have been a vegetarian for 20 years and I am the biggest animal rights person you will ever meet but PETA is insane. They are ridiculous in the way they go about things.

  • Kayla

    This write-up of the situation answers my question best:

  • orville

    This *has* to be a hoax. If not, ick. Just ick.

  • Karen

    While reading this, I actually checked the date… because this sounds like an April Fools joke.

  • Brody

    Hehe. PETA should ask Rob Pattinson. He looks like he’s got plenty of B.O. to go around. Plus, vampire-flavored tofu would be so very ironic.

  • Snarkle

    I’m sure there are many, many women and a few men who have sampled a couple teaspoon’s worth of George Clooney’s protein.

  • eyeheartnyc

    I’d rather get it straight from the source…

  • Marina

    This is an example of how life can get weirder. Or maybe PETA jus have weird vegans running the place :)

  • Toddie

    That’s GOT to be a joke. It sounds like something THE ONION would come up with.

  • vw

    PETA is an organization filled with people who have no common sense and militant attitudes. they act like they’ve had total lobotomys. this is the most disgusting, outrageous thing yet!!!!!!!!

  • Nix

    Hey, this is pretty tame and amusing, in a gross way, for PETA. Usually they’re nonlethal terrorists.

  • BJW

    Ever considered a grammar check? God had a capital letter last time i checked, even if you don’t believe in Him.

  • Skepacabra

    Yeah, I also blogged about this, only I was much harsher on PETA ( This is not a hoax or an early April Fools prank but rather just PETA doing what they always do. Remember, only a few months ago they dressed up like KKK members to protest dog breeding.
    Really, these guys are media whores who are willing to behave like jerks to get attention. I have zero respect for them.

  • Nancy

    This is sick!!!! Sick…Sick ….Sick!! PETA rejects dog breeding but wants us to eat sweaty-tasting tofu! F*#@!% Sick!!

  • lucas s

    I love it! i’ve volunteered with peta over the years.. and experience has taught us that provocative and controversial campaigns make the difference between keeping important yet depressing subjects invisible and exposing them to the public. PETA makes a point of offering something for all tastes – from the most conservative to the most radical – and this approach has proved very successful. PETA has conducted undercover investigations supported by careful documentation and tirelessly pursued justice through the courts and colourful demonstrations, stunts, and campaigns that drew international media coverage to previously hidden issues. These efforts have led to countless victories for animals. PETA does a great job at getting attention for animal issues while keeping things fun.. PETA hopes people will lighten up a little, get their attention in a playful way to get people to make a difference. I think this CloFo stunt is another success. it got your attention didnt it?

    • Myself

      PETA have struck me as a bunch of whackjobs. There’s a difference between making the public aware and throwing paint and all the other sh!t they do. WTF is wrong with these people? Seriously? Yeah this got my attention but in a very negative way towards their organization! It’s just more proof that several of their “advocates” are in serious need of institutionalization! So far, it’s appeared that collectively, there isn’t a spare brain cell among the group! It’s one thing to be an animal rights advocate–it’s quite another to be a fanatic. These people rate right up there with Scientologists.

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